


Brothers In Christ: A Wizzard's Love

by Sashataakheru



Series: Brothers In Christ [2]
Category: Electric Light Orchestra RPF, The Chaser RPF, The Move RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Steampunk, Angst, Body Worship, Catholicism, Christianity, Community: polybigbang, Depressive Thoughts, F/F, Georgian Period, Internalised Homophobia, M/M, Magic, Multi, Polyamory, Prayer, Redemption, Ritual, Scar Worship, Service, Sexual Experimentation, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, altered states of consciousness, anointing with oil, elemental powers, magical initiations, potentially coercive sexual situation, religion as a kink, religious devotion, spiritual ponderings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-15
Updated: 2013-11-15
Packaged: 2018-01-01 15:41:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 69,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1045644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sashataakheru/pseuds/Sashataakheru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hugh can hardly believe his luck. Just when he thought all was lost, he has reconciled with his oldest friend, Sir Roy, and gained a mentor and supervisor in Lord Aylesford. As he and Sir Roy work towards their first degrees, and adjust to life at the Earl's estate, Hugh finds he is in need of their love, and their acceptance, because feeling like an outcast is an all too familiar feeling.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** This is a complete work of fiction. Titles and estates, and some family names, have been borrowed from historical records, but the characters within this story who hold those titles are not intended to be based on anyone who has previously held or currently holds any of these titles, and should be considered entirely fictional creations.
> 
>  **Author's Notes:** Written for Poly Big Bang. This is a magical steampunkish world set in AU!Georgian England, specifically in and around the town of Birmingham, in 1772. It is an alternate universe, where magic was discovered in the 1500s. It is as historically accurate as is required for the world, given it is an alternate universe with magic. Also, in this AU, wizzards are a distinct class that sit between the nobility and the gentry. And before anyone asks, 'wizzard' is not a typo. That's just how they spell it in this world.
> 
>  **Short Cast List:** Carl Wayne as Lord Aylesford; Roy Wood as Sir Roy, Hugh McDowell as, well, Mr Hugh McDowell; Rick Price as Sir Richard; Bev Bevan as Lord Stafford; Mik Kaminski as Lord Capill; Charles Firth as His Majesty King Charles III; Craig Reucassel as Queen Charlotte; Andrew Hansen as Lord Darling; + various original characters.
> 
> Full Cast List with titles and such can be found here: [illustrated](http://3evilmuses.dreamwidth.org/63910.html#cutid1) \- [text only](http://3evilmuses.dreamwidth.org/63910.html#cutid2).

Sir Roy entered the Academy library with a sense of joy and belonging. He'd finally been officially enrolled as an Apprentice at the Birmingham Academy of Magical Sciences after a summer spent in what he felt was limbo. His older brother had died, he baronetcy had been thrust upon his young shoulders, and his mother had almost thwarted his attempts to continue his magical education until Lord Aylesford had intervened. Now, with a supervisor and a project in mind, things were beginning to look up. The school year had begun, and seeing all the children there made Sir Roy glad to be back. 

The library was quiet, and he spent a moment in front of the book of exam records, seeing his recent addition on the bottom of the list: _Sir Roy Wood, 7th Baronet of Castle Bromwich Hall: music magic - full pass with distinction_ , was scrawled there, with a notation for where to find his exam papers and essays on music magic. He'd spent the past three weeks writing up some final essays for Lord Albion, Archmage of the Academy, so that they would be there for future generations to play with. Sir Roy smiled as he brushed a finger over his name. 

"Roy, oh, you're here! You, sir, are late," Hugh said cheerfully, coming over to him as he saw him there by the exam book.

Sir Roy smiled, saving a more intimate greeting for later. "Is he really angry? I'm sorry, I couldn't leave any earlier, and you know how fast Castella walks. I got here as soon as I could."

"Oh, it's fine. We're just going over our projects today, and we've only just started. I thought we'd have a bit of time to talk before, but it's alright. Come on, we'll talk afterwards," Hugh said. 

Hugh took his friend's hand and took him over to the small meeting room at the back where several other students were gathered with Lord Stafford and Sir Richard Whateley, two of their teachers and supervisors. The students were among the newest group of Apprentices to begin their studies, and while most still lived at the Academy, Sir Roy did not. He took his seat towards the back next to Hugh, hoping he wasn't in too much trouble for being late. Hugh sat beside him, smiling eagerly with anticipation. 

"My apologies, my Lord, Sir Richard, I got here as fast as I could. I hope I have not delayed the meeting very much," Sir Roy said.

"Do not apologise, I know you had a way to come to get here, and I appreciate your coming today. It's important for us to get an idea of what you're all planning to work on this year. I'm glad you came, Sir Roy, as I'm interested to know what you should wish to work on," Lord Stafford said.

"I had not particularly thought of anything much yet, my Lord, except perhaps continuing my work on music magic. I feel that is where my passion lies at this moment," Sir Roy said.

"Have you seen Lord Capill yet? I have heard he is interested in assisting you with your experimentations, if you are willing," Sir Richard said.

"I was hoping to see him today, Sir Richard, if that is possible, to talk about that. I would appreciate his assistance," Sir Roy said.

"He is in London today, as it happens, but he said to tell you that if you are here on Friday, he will gladly see you to talk over your project," Sir Richard said.

"Then I shall see him Friday. Thank you, Sir Richard," Sir Roy said.

Sir Roy relaxed after that, sensing that his teachers were moving on to other students. He still did not particularly like being so exposed, but at least he'd got his idea out, and he could now relax and just enjoy the process of hearing what everyone else was planning to do. He was aware that Hugh still had not really decided on his project yet, though he had several ideas he was thinking about. Sir Roy had spent many hours already talking with him about which he should choose, though Hugh was not under immediate pressure to decide just yet. He would have to settle on something sooner or later, though, if he was going to finish it in a year.

"I still think you should do the pebble food," Sir Roy whispered to Hugh as Sir Richard began talking about procedures and timelines.

"You really think so? It's not that clever, is it? It's just some pretty magic," Hugh whispered back.

"It is like perpetual fire. You can't really see its potential right now, but it will revolutionise the whole world if it works on a large scale. Isn't that what you wanted to do with it?" Sir Roy replied.

Hugh glanced at him, unconvinced. "You really think it's that good?"

"Imagine making a whole large pot of the stuff. Throwing it all together into a giant cauldron. You could feed the poor with very little and make sure they had enough food. With perpetual fire to keep them warm, we could make life better for them," Sir Roy said.

"Since when did you care for the welfare of the poor?" Hugh sneered.

"Since I can see how that pebble food could be used. You could have a legacy like His Majesty's. He brought fire to the people. You could bring food. You could feed the whole world," Sir Roy said.

Sir Roy could tell immediately that Hugh was uncomfortable with the comparison; Hugh shifted and turned away, pretending he was not listening. Sir Roy let the matter drop, and did not speak further, except for offering a brief whispered apology to Hugh for insulting him. Hugh could be rather sensitive when the matter of the King came up, and Sir Roy decided it was not the time to pursue that any further. Instead, he took out his small notebook and a pencil and decided he ought to be taking notes on the dates Lord Stafford was currently talking about, for when they would have to produce samples of their work to ensure they were progressing adequately. He had no desire to miss any, and potentially fall behind on his work. He did want to graduate into his first degree in a year, if possible. Then again, he felt he was further along than most, given he was continuing his work on music magic for his Apprenticeship, rather than beginning a new project from scratch. Most were not so lucky.

* * *

Hugh took Sir Roy back to their old room once the meeting was over. It had been too long since they'd been able to be together like this, and not just because their relationship had been so fractured over the summer. Hugh had not taken on a new room mate, leaving Sir Roy's old bed and chest unused. Sir Roy felt the room looked emptier than it had been, even though his old bed was now strewn with papers and books. It was not an unusual sight; Sir Roy had grown used to Hugh spreading his work all over the place when they shared this room, particularly during the periods of intense exam preparation. A few old scorch marks were still visible on the old floorboards, evidence of their magical practice when things had not entirely gone to plan. 

"Do you miss it here? I mean, I know you're probably never coming back here, but do you still miss it, anyway?" Hugh asked as he looked over at his old friend.

"Yes, I do miss it. I cannot fault the joys of living at Packington, but it isn't the same without you here with me. I pray every night that Lord Aylesford will allow you to move in with us, because I miss you so much. The time we spent apart, when we were frightened and fighting, has made me crave your company now that we are reconciled. Has Lord Aylesford made any promises yet about that?" Sir Roy said.

Hugh shook his head. "Not yet, my friend. I believe he said he would make his decision based on what my teachers thought of me during the meeting today. You know, how solid my project ideas are, how committed I am, that sort of thing. I've been busy trying to convince my old teachers that I've changed, but it's not always easy. I have to prove it, and that's not always easy when all they know is the way I used to be." 

Hugh cleared some space on his bed for them to sit, and gestured for Sir Roy to join him. Sir Roy felt it strange to be there, as if nothing had changed, when really, so much had changed in such a short amount of time. He noticed Hugh glancing at his companion's ring, bearing Lord Aylesford's arms, and instinctively covered it with his other hand, not wishing to trigger an argument about it.

"I hope Lord Aylesford lets me move in soon, though. I do miss you too, and I would love to share a room with you again. He did say we could share the room, did he not? I hope he would not make me take another room. I couldn't bear to be so close and yet so far away from you," Hugh said.

"I have been talking to Lord Aylesford about that, yes, to ensure he understands what we need. He says it's unusual to have a companion with a companion, but apparently it isn't unheard of, and, God willing, you will be sharing a room with me again. I think my Lord is willing to extend you some freedoms to ensure you are still willing to allow him to teach you," Sir Roy said.

Hugh visibly relaxed at the news. "That's good to know. I was afraid he would keep us apart, but perhaps I was worrying unnecessarily. I hoped he would understand my need to be physically close to you."

Sir Roy reassured him. "Yes, he is aware of that. He understands how hard it is to be apart from someone you have lived most of your life with. I just hope you will not throw away the chance my Lord is giving you. I should not wish to lose you again."

Hugh took his hand firmly. "Not a chance, my friend. It was hard enough the short time we spent apart. I do not wish to repeat it. I only wish you will remember me when you are out with your Lord while I am left behind. That, I fear, will be hardest to deal with. Do not forget me, my friend. Please, do not forget me." 

"It may be possible to take you with me to some events, but I cannot always guarantee it. But you will always be with me, in my heart. You never left, even when you cursed me in the streets. It will take more than that to make me stop loving you," Sir Roy said.

Hugh moved a little closer to him, and cupped his cheek. They had not shared any intimacy since they had started back here, and things were still somewhat rocky between them. Indeed, Hugh almost went to kiss him, but pulled away at the last moment and lowered his head, wondering what they were going to do.

"I am never sure what to do with you. You belong to the Earl. You wear Aylesford's ring. I feel I am leading you astray by kissing you," Hugh said.

"Aylesford loves his wife as much as he loves me. Lady Aylesford loves another, as well. I guess I am used to the feeling, but I would understand your jealousy. I do not know what to do about it, because when you come to live with us at Packington, you will have to learn to live with us too, and I am terribly afraid you will not be able to cope with it, and I will lose you again," Sir Roy said.

"Adulterers. Heretics!" Hugh cursed softly as he gently hit Sir Roy's shoulder with his fist, frustrated. His anger did not last, however, and he sighed, his body going limp. "Roy, I am afraid of that, too. I worry so much, but I love you. I love you. I must find a way to make this work, or I will be left alone again. I cannot bear that pain all over again."

Sir Roy brought his friend into a hug, doing his best to support him. "Just love me. That is all I ask of you. Can you promise me that?"

"I shall try, my friend. I shall do my best," Hugh said.

* * *

Hugh arrived at Packington just before ten o'clock a week later. Lord Aylesford had summoned him to discuss their progress together, and Hugh was nervous. He had done everything he could possibly think of to prove he was committed to the Earl, but he still worried he would be rejected. The Earl was offering something no one else had ever offered him before, but he could not quite feel optimistic. He felt it would just be taken away from him again. The world had not done much to show it cared about him, and he was still trying to believe the Earl would not back down on his promises.

Ushered into Lord Aylesford's office, he found the Earl sitting at his desk. Lord Aylesford looked up as he saw Hugh enter, and gestured him to come and take a seat. 

"Please, there's no need to worry. I'm very pleased with your progress so far," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh still wasn't entirely convinced, but he took the praise anyway as he took a seat opposite the Earl. "I - thank you, my Lord. I am grateful you think so."

"I took you on as an Apprentice just over a month ago. I said we would revisit your progress at this time to ascertain whether you are really committed to this, and to see whether I think you are ready to move in here with Sir Roy. That is your understanding of our agreement, Mr McDowell?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord. That is what I understood of our agreement. I have done my best to do as you ask, and focus on my magical education. I hope I have done enough to prove my worth to you, though I would not be surprised if I have failed you somehow. I am very good at letting people down," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford smiled. "I have heard nothing but glowing reports from your teachers back at the Academy. Indeed, they have noticed quite an improvement in your behaviour this past month, which I am glad to hear. They certainly believe you are capable of completing your Apprenticeship if you keep up your work. How do you think you're progressing?"

Hugh shifted a little. He wasn't used to hearing his teachers sing his praises. "I still haven't quite decided on my project, but I've been talking about it with Lord Stafford, and he's helped me work it down to about three that I'd like to discuss with you further before I make a final decision. Sir Roy still thinks I ought to do the pebble magic, but I'm not so sure. I fear it would give away that I was performing higher magics without permission as I developed it well before I gained my Apprenticeship."

"Has Lord Stafford said you would be in trouble for that? Does he know how you came up with that particular magic?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Well, yes, my Lord, I felt I really ought to tell him, just so he knew. He didn't seem to think I would be in any trouble, but I still worry, given how badly I behaved. I cannot help my fears. The world has not given me cause to expect anything else," Hugh said.

"If you are not going to get into any trouble for it, then I think you should pursue it. You still have not shown me how you make food from pebbles, and if it is true, I will feel like I am justified in nurturing your development. The world needs a wizzard like you, whether you believe it or not," Lord Aylesford said.

"I still find it hard to believe in myself the way you do, and the way Sir Roy does. But I would be foolish to turn down such an opportunity as this, and so I will try to live up to the promise you see in me. Sir Roy is right when he says I should not turn my back on kindness, even if you are a Protestant," Hugh said.

"Tell me, why did you create the pebble food magic? Was there a reason you wished to make such magic? I refuse to believe it was merely an accidental creation. You do not seem like the sort of wizzard to make accidental discoveries," Lord Aylesford said.

"You are right there, my Lord. I developed the magic because I wished to make sure everyone had food, my Lord. Maybe you never see the poor, the way you're living up here, but I'm Catholic, and I do see them. I'm lucky, because I still have the manor, and I was allowed to learn magic, but there are plenty of others who aren't so lucky. I see them every week in church, my Lord, where we gather as equals before God. We're taught to look out for those less fortunate. The Church teaches us to care for them. That's why I made it. I wanted to feed them in a way that would make five thousand loaves from five grains of sand, to mirror Christ's blessings and bring His love into the world," Hugh said, being as truthful as he dared.

"An admiral vocation, and one I wholeheartedly agree with. Why do you think I have not enclosed my lands? I will not deprive my tennants of food and shelter in order to profit from their misery and misfortune. Do you think this pebble food will be viable on a large scale?" Lord Aylesford said.

"I hope so. I haven't really tried it yet, because I didn't feel it was my place. I wanted to save it for my Apprentice year when I would be allowed to practice officially with the Vegetable and Mineral magics that are needed to make it work," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford sat back, considering him. "Alright. Say I allowed you to continue to develop this magic. What would you need to do that? What kind of space, what equipment would you need?"

Hugh allowed himself to look hopeful that he would be able to work on his magic the way he wanted to. "My Lord, all I require is a fire, a cooking pot, some pebbles, and some simple herbs and spices. I have only managed to make spiced buns thus far, but I hope in time to make bread, and maybe some sort of stew. Perhaps even a soup, if I manage it right. The sort of food that can feed an army with very little. It could be useful for that too, is that not correct? Because they would not need so much to carry with them on campaign."

Lord Aylesford nodded approvingly. "It could well be used for the military, yes. That's very prescient of you to have thought of that. I am surprised you need so little for it, but if all you really need is a fire, a pot, and some spices and herbs, then perhaps you have found your own perpetual fire."

"Yes, my Lord, that is all I need. It is very simple. The power comes from the spells used to cast it, not the ingredients used," Hugh said.

"I can only imagine. Have you had any of your second four initiations yet? I can only wonder at how powerful it will be when you have been properly tuned," Lord Aylesford said.

"I have not done them yet, my Lord. I wanted to wait until I knew I could do this project first so I would be sure I would be able to serve my Apprenticeship without worrying it would be taken from me," Hugh said.

"Sir Roy has not done his last two yet, either. Perhaps we will arrange to have your first initiations done over the next month or so to prepare you both for your future work," Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord. I would appreciate that. I am eager to begin work on this magic to see it fulfil its potential," Hugh said. "So does that mean - my Lord, I would not wish to be presumptuous, but-"

Lord Aylesford smiled as he gestured for him to be quiet. "Does that mean I will allow you to move here to be with Sir Roy? Yes, Mr McDowell, I am willing to let you come and live here. However, there will be ground rules, and I will not tolerate any neglect or laziness. If you come to live here, you will be diligent with your studies, you will report to me weekly so I can keep a check of your progress, a rule I will enforce with Sir Roy as well, and I expect your best behaviour. I will not have you embarrassing yourself before my Ladies. Is that understood?"

Hugh nodded. "Yes, my Lord. I will be on my best behaviour. Am I to have my own room, then?"

"For the time being, yes. I understand you desire to share Sir Roy's room, but I feel I ought to keep the two of you separate for the time being, just to see how you adjust to living here. If, after a month, I am sure you will be fine, then you may share Sir Roy's room. Do not think I am being harsh, but this is not a normal household, and with your relationship with Sir Roy such as it is, I would not wish to cause you stress or anxiety by coming into a household where you may have to see Sir Roy's relationship with me. I wish to make sure you are prepared for that, because while I can assure you Sir Roy does not love you any less than he loves me, he has duties as my companion he must fulfil along with his Apprenticeship duties, and it may be that I will have to take him away from time to time. I will do my best to limit those absences, however, because I do not wish to distress you or neglect you. If it is possible for you to come with us, I will allow it. I will also ensure you can spend some time alone with me, as I wish to get to know you better than I do right now. If I am to mentor you properly, we ought not to be enemies, yes?" 

Hugh lowered his head. "I was afraid of that, my Lord. I must admit I do find it ... strange, the way you live, and it does trouble me. I struggle to deal with your adultery and treachery, and I am still afraid you will steal Sir Roy away from me, because you are an Earl, and what am I but the hated son of a baronet with no land or title to his name? I am Catholic, and you are the King's beloved man. I do not feel worthy of your attention, my Lord."

Lord Aylesford got to his feet. "Come, walk with me, Hugh. I think this discussion is better had out in the sunshine."

Hugh stood, unsure. "Yes, my Lord."

* * *

Hugh had his first chance to see the gardens as he walked with Lord Aylesford. They crossed the lawns and walked along the path by the lake, strolling slowly. Hugh wasn't sure of the purpose of this, but he was willing to trust the Earl, if it was what he wanted. The weather was fine, and being outside in nature improved Hugh's mood. He felt more at ease, away from the trappings of the Earl's vast manor.

"Sir Roy was like you when I first met him. He felt he wasn't worthy of my attention, either. This is why I want to spend time with you, Hugh, so you can better understand where I'm coming from. I know you feel we are different, that even our faiths are different, but if we both have faith in Christ, how, really, are we so different? You are my brother as much as Sir Roy is, and I will defend you until the day I die," Lord Aylesford said as they stopped by the lake, taking a seat under the shade of a tree.

"Sir Roy said you believe in a God of love like I do. Is that true, my Lord? I thought your Church did not take to such a view, that it was heresy," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford gazed up a little, looking thoughtful. "This is where God is found, my friend, out here in nature. The magic we cast is a manifestation of God's power in the world. The power of the ten elements all come from here. from water and earth, fire and air, and the plants and animals around us. I have never seen anything by the loving face of God out here. I know I have a fearsome reputation as a soldier, but I am a man of peace in all things I do. Nothing good comes from war and bloodshed."

"That is a very Catholic teaching, my Lord. I did not know you believed magic came from God. I understood your Church believed it was an unnatural force that was barely tolerated," Hugh said.

"I am not my Church, Mr McDowell, and neither are you. We are but two men standing beside a lake, two tiny specks of existence made bright by the light of the Cosmos. What matters more than that? Religions are filled with politics, with divisions and hatred. I decided long ago I didn't want any part in that. I have my own faith," Lord Aylesford said. "You practice magic long enough, and this is what happens. You will probably find yourself doing the same in a decade or so once you are a more experienced wizzard."

Hugh looked over at him. "But you are the King's beloved Earl, his right hand man. How can you leave the Church?"

Lord Aylesford glanced over at him. "When did I say I had left the Church? The religious requirements of the King are not affected by my own faith, nor would I bring up these things with His Majesty. My faith does not belong in Court. It lives out here in the land. No building can confine it."

Hugh went to reply, but wasn't sure what to say. He had heard most of this from Sir Roy, but he hadn't really believed it. But here was Lord Aylesford telling him all about it, and it confused and disturbed him. "My Lord, you will forgive me for suggesting this, but you sound like a pagan. I have heard about the old gods in your bath house. It was bad enough that you were Protestant, but if you are pagan, my Lord..."

Lord Aylesford brushed him off. "I am not pagan. I am no heathen who worships false gods. I have pledged my life to Christ, and I will die knowing I have served Him well. If you are looking for reasons to hate me, that is not one of them."

Hugh looked chastened, regretting having made the accusation. "I am sorry, my Lord, I should not have spoken such a thing. I am sorry for any offence I have caused."

Lord Aylesford did not seem bothered by it. "You are young and fervent in your belief because it gives you certainty and love, which is all you crave. I cannot blame you for seeing the world as you do. You have caused me no offence. It has shown me more about you than I think you had planned."

"My Lord, if I may speak frankly, I am Catholic. My faith is deemed treacherous and false. I am sorry if I defend it so fiercely, but it is all I have. Without it, I am lost," Hugh said.

"Yes, I have witnessed that over the summer when you were in the Watch. I do hope there will be no repeat performances," Lord Aylesford said.

"I am sorry, my Lord. I acted out of fear. I have not had much reason to be joyful during my life, and Sir Roy was all I had. He made me happy. He gave me sanctuary from the manor at home and my drunken father. I have grown up in a manor, the son of a baronet, and I have been so utterly unhappy I can scarcely admit it to you. But I was alright when I had Sir Roy. He might've been the only man in the world who loved me, but it was enough. With Sir Roy, and God, I was happy. Content, even. But they were taken away from me, and I was lost, my Lord. God turned away from me, and Sir Roy fell in love with you in a way he had never loved me. I will not lie to you when I say that I felt betrayed when I heard about it. The one man I relied on had turned against me, and I was so frightened of being alone that all I could think of to do was lash out in hatred and anger. I felt powerless, my Lord. What am I to you, my Lord? I am not worthy of Sir Roy, not when you are vying for his heart. No, I will concede defeat where that is concerned. I cannot compete with you, and I ought not try," Hugh said, unable to hold back his words. 

Lord Aylesford considered him a moment before he spoke. "Do you really feel I am taking him from you completely? That you will never be allowed to be with him? I can reassure you that I mean to do no such thing. I was at the Academy too, Mr McDowell. I shared a room with a man I still consider to be my closest friend and companion. I know what kind of bonds are created in that kind of situation. I know what it's like to be so alone and afraid, knowing you have only yourself for comfort. You may find it hard to believe all of that, but it is the truth. Friendships are forged there that are impossible to break. I could not take Sir Roy from you no matter how hard I try. He will always be yours."

Hugh shook his head. "No, you lie, my Lord. You are an Earl, and you are offering him everything. What can I offer him? Nothing. I have nothing, my Lord. My father will disinherit me, and I will have nothing. Friendship is not enough, my Lord, not when you are his master."

Lord Aylesford touched his shoulder gently and looked over at him. "You are seeing this as a contest, that somehow I am vying to marry him and take him from you forever. He is my companion, yes, but he is not my wife. It is a different bond, a different sort of relationship, and it is not exclusive by any means. This is what you need to adjust to as you come to live here. If you cannot deal with all our relationships and how differently equal they all are, then perhaps you are better off back at the Academy. I desire nothing more than for you to be at ease with me and with Sir Roy, because I know you are at your best when he is with you. I wish nothing more than to nurture you both and make you into great wizzards. I will see you shine before I die."

"Then let me share his room, my Lord. I have been too long apart from him, and my heart aches to be with him again. Please, my Lord, I offer all penance to you if it will change your mind," Hugh said.

"Allow me a day to think on it, and talk to Sir Roy about what he would prefer. I do not wish to cause you pain if you are sleeping so close to me and I call him into bed with me, particularly if you are so new to our household that you are still coming to terms with how we do things. Jealousy is not agreeable to making this work, and that applies to everyone, including me, and my ladies. You must think on that too, Mr McDowell, because if for any reason you think you will not be able to cope with living with us, I wish to hear it. Your welfare is most important to me if I am to guide you in your Apprenticeship. We must learn to trust each other, and be open with each other, or this will never work," Lord Aylesford said.

"You would take him to bed, my Lord?" Hugh said, his voice soft. He had not really considered that he would be seeing that. He would hear them together. 

Lord Aylesford nodded in acknowledgement. "That is part of our relationship, Mr McDowell. I helped him love himself, so he could love you."

Hugh was quiet for some time before he spoke. "Then perhaps I would not mind so much a room of my own. Just, my Lord, I do not wish to know what you do with Sir Roy. I hope you will offer me the same courtesy."

"I am a gentleman, Mr McDowell. I would not dare share such details with anyone who was not there with me. I hope you think more highly of me than that," Lord Aylesford said.

"My Lord, I am not sure what I think about you right now. I feel more conflicted than I was expecting, and I am not sure how to resolve these issues," Hugh said.

"What are you worried about? Be honest with me, or I will not be able to help you," Lord Aylesford said.

"It is as I have said, my Lord. I am worried you will take Sir Roy from me, and I am not sure I could bear that. I am alone when he is not with me, and part of the reason I created the pebble food was so I could sustain myself once I am disinherited. I am sure it will happen one day when my father decides he's had enough of me. I will be cut off, and that will be the end of it. If I can create food with magic, at least I will have fire and food, if I have nothing else," Hugh said.

"Do you really believe your future is so fixed? What makes you so sure that will all come to pass? You will be able to make a life for yourself once you are a qualified wizzard. You will be able to make your own future. How have you come to see the future in such dark shades?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh shrugged, unsure. "What else is waiting for me, my Lord? My father will not let me inherit, so what is left for me but poverty and disgrace? I am not so important that I will be able to find a patron who will support me."

"My dear friend, you are looking at your patron! Why do you think I am investing so much in you? You have great talent and creativity. You will be a great wizzard one day. You'll be remembered for your creations, mark my words. The world will know you and honour you," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh shook his head sadly. "No one will remember a Catholic wizzard who ended up poor and ruined, no matter how great his creations."

"You are suffering from that dreaded melancholy Sir Roy told me about. He warned me you suffered from it. I may not be able to shift your mood right now, but give me time. I will make something of you. I will make you great, fit to enter God's heaven," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh found himself sitting down on the ground weeping, overwhelmed. He expected he would be left alone, as what Earl would spend time to comfort him? No one else ever did. But he felt the Earl's arms around him, and he held him close. 

"What is your favourite Psalm? Shall I chant it for you?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh didn't quite parse the question immediately. "Uh, Psalm 3, my Lord. It brings me comfort like nothing else does."

"Ahh, yes, I know it well. Just listen to my voice, Hugh. Listen to the words of God. Let Him touch your heart and sweep away the darkness with His grace."

Hugh couldn't find his voice. But he heard Lord Aylesford's voice in his ear. His Latin was very good, and it shocked him to hear a Protestant Earl chanting to him in Latin. But it had the right effect. It worked in the same way that Sir Roy chanting in Latin worked for him. The rituals surrounding those words stirred in his mind, and he could focus on those words, feeling how it moved him all through his body. Lord Aylesford was not speaking harshly; indeed, he spoke softly and with such kindness and compassion, his arms a reassuring presence around him. 

After a while, Hugh found himself chanting along with him. He wasn't sure how many repetitions of the Psalm they'd done, but Hugh didn't care. All he knew was that the words spilling from his lips were a prayer to God, begging to be relieved of his suffering. And, little by little, the darkness eased. 

"I think this is why my father hates me, my Lord. I have always carried this darkness with me. It consumes me, my Lord, and I know not how to rid myself of it. It is worse than the periods where all I want to do is rebel. I hate being reckless and I hate being melancholy. I just can't seem to control myself sometimes, and I do not know what is wrong with me. Perhaps I am possessed. Maybe I am being punished. I am never sure, and I am not sure I will ever be cured. Let me go, my Lord. I fear I am not worth your time," Hugh said after a while, his voice low and sad.

Lord Aylesford pressed a soft kiss to his head, and stroked his hair gently. "Every man is worth my time, no matter his ills. I will not let you destroy yourself. Find it within yourself to trust me, and let me help you."

In that moment, Hugh wasn't sure he could.


	2. Chapter 2

Hugh found himself in bed. He wasn't sure he remembered how he'd got there, but as he sat up, he became aware of a vague memory of being outside and then he saw himself leaping into the lake-

"Oh, that must be why. I wondered why I was so frightfully cold," Hugh murmured. He shivered as he spoke it and huddled back into the bed, seeking its warmth. "I wonder what possessed me to do such a thing?"

No answer was forthcoming. He still had sketchy memories and wasn't sure what had led up to that moment. He remembered he'd been talking with Lord Aylesford, though about what, he did not know. But he was not sure why he had leapt into the lake. What on earth had possessed him to do that? He was troubled by it. He was reckless, yes, but to leap into a lake?

He took a breath, wondering where he was. He assumed by the grandeur that he was at Lord Aylesford's house, but as his vision cleared, and he woke up a little more, he discovered this was not the case. That he was back at Cathedral Manor shocked him. It was not his home, not at all, and he thought he'd made it clear enough to Lord Aylesford that he did not wish to be back here. 

"Which one of my bastard parents brought me here? I must leave. I will not recover in this house," Hugh said as he slipped out of bed.

He looked around and saw a tray of meagre food beside his bed. Suddenly aware of how hungry he was, he ate it, not caring what it was. It gave him strength and he felt better after that, determined to make his way back to Packington. He found his clothes waiting for him. Dressing as quickly as he dared in case anyone wanted to come and stop him, he took his things and made to leave, unwilling to spend any more time in that house. He did not wish to confront anyone, if it could be avoided. However, as he got to the front door, he was accosted by his mother, who did not look especially pleased to see him there. 

"I see you did not drown, then," Lady Elizabeth said.

"No, my Lady, I did not. If you would please allow me to leave, I will get out of your house," Hugh said, being as polite as he could manage. 

"I wish you'd never come back. You're just like your father, always risking your life. Why did you come back here, anyway?" Lady Elizabeth said.

Hugh scowled at her. "I do not recall how I came to be back here. Last time I checked, I was at Packington House with Lord Aylesford. Was it my father who brought me back here? Why?"

"I do not know how you got here, but I do not care. I have not been here to see how you arrived. I was in London looking for a better son. Leave before Sir Jeremiah gets home and discovers you here. I do not want an argument, not in my house. Get out," Lady Elizabeth said.

"Then I wish you had let me out without wasting your breath speaking to me, my lady," Hugh said as he pushed past her.

Finally free of the house, he did not look back as he went round to the stables to find a horse. His own was invariably back at the Academy, but he felt a certain sense of righteous anger at taking one of his father's horses without permission, just as he had been taken without his consent from Packington. Once he had chosen a horse and tacked her up, he spent no more time there as he rode back to the Academy. His father could retrieve his horse from there, if he so desired.

* * *

At the Academy, Hugh found Sir Roy in his room waiting for him when he arrived. Sir Roy was reading, and he looked up and smiled gladly as he saw him. Leaving his book, he got up to greet him. 

"Oh, Hugh, I am so glad to see you, my friend. It has been days. I thought you dead," Sir Roy said.

"I am sorry to disappoint you, but I am very much alive. Do you perhaps know how I ended up back at Cathedral Manor? I have no memory of it," Hugh said. 

Sir Roy looked downcast. He was not sure how Hugh would react to the news, but felt it wrong not to tell him what had happened. "Your father came to get you from Packington. He was drunk and argumentative, and insisted he have you back home, rather than with a Protestant Earl. Lord Aylesford was not willing to argue with him, nor go against the wishes of your father. I tried to get him to leave you where you were, but Lord Aylesford did not wish to make trouble. You are still considered a child, and your father can do with you whatever he wishes until you come of age. I am sorry to have let it happen. I did try to tell Lord Aylesford what a toxic place it is for you, but he did not wish to upset Mage Jeremiah further. I also tried to visit you, but your father would not let me see you. He called me a heretic, but I was not willing to argue. I suspected that you would return here first, and so I have waited here for you ever since, hoping you would come back to me."

Hugh merely sighed. "I thought that is what might have happened. I jumped into the lake, didn't I? That's all I remember, really. I hate my father so much for this. I do not blame Lord Aylesford. There are times to argue with my father, but not when he is drunk. I am sorry you had to witness that, and I am sorry he offended you. He can be so tiresome. I wish I could disinherit him and take the manor and title for myself."

"You should go see Lord Aylesford. He wanted to see you as soon as you returned. He has felt responsible for allowing you to be sent back home, and I believe he wishes to offer penance for it," Sir Roy said.

"Will you come with me, Roy? I am in need of your company right now," Hugh said.

"Of course, Hugh. I was due to see him this afternoon anyway, so it is no trouble. I will be glad to accompany you," Sir Roy said.

* * *

Hugh didn't expect Lord Aylesford to greet him with a warm embrace when they were invited into his office. Hugh was not used to being shown such affection, and it startled him. He still felt better for being in his presence, though. In spite of what had happened, Hugh did not hate him for it. 

"I am glad you are alright, my friend. I have not heard word of your condition for over a week, and I feared you might have been taken ill from the cold water. But I am glad you are well and I am glad you are here with me. Allow me to offer my deepest apologies for sending you back home. I did not wish to do it, but I have more sense than to argue with your father in the condition he was in. I am sorry to see him in such a stage. He was a brilliant wizzard in his younger days, but it seems he has become bitter and old, and full of hatred. I am not surprised you never spend any time at home," Lord Aylesford said.

"It is as you say, my Lord. He was a brilliant wizzard, and I will be the first to defend his record, but as a human being, as my father, I hate him with a burning passion. What he has done is not your fault, my Lord. Greater men than you have bowed to his wishes, though not many more, I'd wager. I am sorry he came here causing trouble. I never wished for you to see him like that. He is nothing but a hollow shell, now. The brilliant wizzard is long dead to me. I am not sure I ever knew him," Hugh said.

"Indeed, it is a disappointment to see how he has fallen. But enough about him. How are you? Are you well? I was frightfully worried after you jumped into the lake. I was afraid you would suffer a chill and death, but I am glad to see you alive. It gladdens my heart," Lord Aylesford said.

"I feel well enough, my Lord. I have not had any physician check my condition, though, not to my recollection. Once I realised where I was, I left as soon as possible. I needed to get out of there and be back with the two people who care," Hugh said.

"I shall send you to mine, then, just to make sure you are not going to die on me. I will pay for any treatment you require as penance for what you have suffered," Lord Aylesford said.

"Thank you, my Lord. I appreciate your kindness," Hugh said, bowing his head respectfully.

Lord Aylesford touched his head, embraced it with his hands, and brought him close again. His arms soon found their way around Hugh's body, and he simply held him. 

"I am so glad you are alive, Hugh. So very glad. I was worried you wouldn't make it, but God has given you a second chance at life. I am so glad to see you again," Lord Aylesford murmured.

"I do not understand what I have done to win your affection so readily, but I am thankful for it. I like knowing someone cares for me. It makes the darkness seem less threatening," Hugh said, his voice soft and even.

"The light of God will always cast away the darkness, never forget that, Hugh," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh closed his eyes, feeling for a moment the love of God swelling around him. He had rarely felt God's love in his short life, but every moment brought him peace. He smiled, and allowed himself to hold the Earl back, embracing his love. It was sinking in that Lord Aylesford really did seem to care about him. It wasn't just words to calm him. His love and affection for him were real, as real as Sir Roy's affection for him, and it startled him to realise that. 

"I do not know why God has finally turned his face to me, but I will not question it any longer. I am tired of being alone, of feeling worthless and isolated and afraid. If this is where I am meant to be, then so be it," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford stroked his hair gently, whispering calming words to him. "You are never alone while God lives in your heart."

* * *

Sir Roy showed Hugh through to his room, adjoined to Lord Aylesford's room. Hugh was amazed by its finery, and he was suddenly envious of his friend's position in society. He had nothing like this. As he looked around, he saw his cases sitting on the floor by the desk, and he almost didn't want to believe what that meant. 

"Are they my- They can't be. But I never even packed them-" Hugh said as he walked over to them. He had not even noticed that his things had been missing from his room at the Academy.

"My Lord asked me to pack your things and bring them here for you. I didn't want to unpack them, though. I wasn't sure if you would still be comfortable sleeping here with me, knowing sometimes I may be called to share my Lord's bed. Another room has been prepared for you across the corridor, if you would prefer that instead," Sir Roy said.

Hugh ran a hand over the top case, recognising it as his own. He opened it and smiled as he saw how neatly Sir Roy had packed his things. "He will let me stay here with you? He has allowed it?" 

"He has, yes. I believe he has already outlined the conditions under which you will be living here, though I am not sure if you remember them, given it was the day you jumped into the water. But I am sure he will forgive you if you ask for him to go over those details again," Sir Roy said.

Hugh turned to look at him. "What would you have me do, then? I would not wish to come between you and Lord Aylesford, because you have a specific role to play for him. What am I but a friend to you and his Apprentice? I do not belong in this room."

Sir Roy walked towards him and took his hands gently. He gazed absently down at the floor before he spoke. "You belong here if I say you do. I thought this was what you wanted?"

"It is, Roy, believe me, it is. But I do not believe I deserve it. I am nothing to him," Hugh said.

"But you are everything to me. I have negotiated with him that he may limit how often he calls me to bed when we are here together with you because you are just as important here as I am, and he does not wish to upset you or drive you away. He is willing to give us space to find out what kind of relationship we have. Are you willing to commit to me?" Sir Roy said.

Hugh offered a fierce gaze. "I have been committed to you since we were six years old. Do not doubt me now."

Sir Roy backed off, unwilling to challenge him. "I have never doubted you. I have doubted myself many times, but never you. I still wish I could be as creative as you are. I will never be as good a wizzard as you." 

Hugh half-smiled to himself. "Yes, you are still too conservative for a wizzard. Learn to embrace your experimental spirit, my friend, or you will never amount to anything."

"So, will you stay, Hugh? Will you stay with me? We can share a bed now, if you so desire. But I would understand if you wished a room to yourself," Sir Roy said.

"Let me talk with Lord Aylesford again. I want to be sure he cares for me like you do. I need to know I'm wanted here, and that I am not intruding on something important. I know you have reassured me that this is not the case, but I wish to hear it from him, as well," Hugh said.

"I understand. He is our patron, and supervisor, after all. I will miss having you here with me if you choose to have your own room, but I would understand. It took me a long time to understand how this household works, too, Hugh, so don't feel like you are alone in adjusting to these things," Sir Roy said.

"I want to accept it, Roy. I really do. But every time I think about him taking you to bed, and his wife taking her lover to bed, I have to fight my own faith, my own beliefs. I thought I had found my peace with my sexuality. Clearly, that is not the case, or I would not feel so uncomfortable about it," Hugh said.

"But Hugh, it is the kind of marriage I have yearned for. I have seen how happy they both are, and how they have still managed to fulfil their marital duties by having children, but still finding space to be with who they prefer. Have you not spoken of this kind of relationship your whole life? Is that not why you rejected that marriage proposal all those years ago?" Sir Roy said.

"Yes, it is all I have ever wanted, Roy. That is the problem. I am both envious and torn apart about it. There is the part of me that feels compromised living with adulterers, and yet, it is all I could ever have wanted. I think, perhaps, I just feel like it will never be something I will be part of, no matter how long I am here. Lord Aylesford loves you, Roy. He does not love me, not like that. I am not part of this household in that way. This marriage does not include me, and that is why I feel I am intruding," Hugh said.

Sir Roy lowered his head a moment. "I did not know you felt so excluded, Hugh. I am sorry if I have made you feel that way. Is there anything I can do about it?" 

Hugh shook his head, unsure, as he walked over to the window. He stared out at the grounds, wondering if he hadn't made a grave mistake. But God clearly meant for him to be here, and who was he to disobey God's word? He stood there feeling utterly conflicted as he felt Sir Roy come and stand behind him, his arms slipping around his waist.

"I am feeling like I do not belong anywhere, Roy. I am an oddly shaped peg that will never find the right place to go. I am afraid of feeling so isolated, but I do not know how to fix it. I have lived this way my whole life. How do you stop feeling like that?" Hugh said.

"You let yourself be loved," Sir Roy said.

Hugh felt he knew that was true enough, but it was easy to acknowledge that. More difficult was allowing himself to do it. "Open my heart, Roy. I fear I have lost the key."

"You are afraid, that's why. You are scared of rejection, that we will both leave you like everyone else in your life has left you," Lord Aylesford said, approaching them as he interrupted them.

Sir Roy and Hugh turned to him, each offering a small bow of respect. Hugh found himself feeling angry that somehow Lord Aylesford knew him better than he knew himself. He was not expecting his words to hurt as much as they did.

"Sir Roy is the only one who has ever shown you any love, is that not correct?" Lord Aylesford continued, turning to Hugh.

Hugh nodded. "Yes, my Lord, that is true."

"It is no wonder you are so afraid of love. Your life has been so bereft of it, and your parents so unloving towards you, that it is little wonder there is any capacity within you to love at all. And yet, it is there, is it not? Your love for Sir Roy burns like a flame within you," Lord Aylesford said.

"It does, my Lord. I do not like the thought of him loving you, but it is not my place to challenge that," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford reached over and lifted Hugh's chin up. He smiled at him softly, and Hugh could find no hatred in his eyes. "You may take all the love you need from me, Hugh. It is freely given. I worry you will never be able to achieve all you wish to achieve while you are so lost and isolated. You need men around you who believe in you, who love you. Let us be those men. Let us lift you up to Heaven."

Hugh went to step back, but found Sir Roy's hand gently touching the small of his back, asking him to stay. 

"We may be companions to each other, bound together by God's love, but there is room for you, Hugh. There will always be room for you here with us," Sir Roy said.

Hugh wasn't sure he believed it, but as Sir Roy and Lord Aylesford embraced him, bringing him close, he felt their love for him surround him, and it made him want to cry. Sir Roy kissed him gently, and Lord Aylesford stroked his hair softly. Hugh froze as Lord Aylesford gently cupped his cheeks and kissed him just like Sir Roy did. Shocked by the attention, Hugh wasn't sure what to do except kiss back, and wonder later why Lord Aylesford was being so intimate with him.

* * *

Once he had taken his pleasure, Hugh found himself unable to stay as Lord Aylesford and Sir Roy consumed their passion with each other. It wasn't that Hugh had been forgotten, but he was troubled now, and he could not think while they were still content to kiss and touch each other tenderly in his presence. It did not seem right, but Hugh did not think he had any power to stop them. He was not sure he had ever wanted the Earl in that sort of intimate manner, and it bothered him. Had he betrayed Sir Roy by doing so? His head was a hazy mix of emotions, and he needed to find some space alone to sift through them. Wordlessly, he dressed and slipped away, trying to find somewhere he could think on his own, without being interrupted.

He was not at all familiar with the house or the grounds. The gardens felt the easiest to get lost in, and once he found his way out, he strolled silently, trying to forget about what his love was doing with the Earl. He had not expected it would actually hurt to leave them like that, even though he had known they shared that form of intimacy before he came here. Was it too late to leave? Perhaps he could still be Lord Aylesford's Apprentice and stay at the Academy. 

He found his way through the formal gardens to the woodlands beyond. It felt far enough away that he did not feel like he was intruding as he walked into the trees to find somewhere quiet and isolated to think. He was beginning to feel his dreaded melancholy creep back again for reasons he was struggling to articulate. 

He had woken in that accursed manor that morning. He could still feel its walls closing in, trying to trap him there. He had no good memories of that house. The only good memories about the house were when he was leaving it for the Academy. He could never wait to leave. His horse would take him away from a cold house, a place without any heart, if it still had one. It would take him away from the noise, from the arguments, from a place that had never welcomed him. 

He had found it so hard to love his parents. They had not made it easy, particularly not when he had his father's reputation to live up to. That was always the hardest part. Hugh would hear him praised in the Academy, and know that the man they praised was not the man he knew. Hugh felt he could not say anything, that to tarnish his name would have him thrown out of the one place he felt safe and accepted.

Hugh sometimes wished he had not inherited his father's talent for magic. It might not have made his life so difficult. He might have been disowned sooner, but at least he might have escaped the pressure to live up to his achievements. His father, after all, had been responsible for discovering healing magic, and had studied medicine alongside magic to see if the two could not be combined. His most important discovery was that open wounds treated with magical fire to seal them healed faster, and patients survived more frequently. No one understood just how this was possible, but it had been demonstrated countless times now before the Royal Society, and before His Majesty. 

His magical contributions were the reason Mage Jeremiah was made a baronet; it was a prestigious enough title for it to be meaningful, but as it was not a peerage, and they would still be regarded as commoners, His Majesty could not be seen to be pandering to Catholics, nor giving them a seat in the Lords. At least, that was how Hugh had always seen it. The title and manor had been given long before he had been born, but it did not stop him knowing why it had been given. Hugh felt His Majesty had invited them to a Royal Banquet, but all he was throwing them was scraps and crumbs. Hugh could find no respect in it, and it had just hardened his hatred for the King. He wished many times that his father had not been given a baronetcy at all. 

And of course, because they now had a title and an estate to pass on, and Hugh was the heir, he would now have to make a good marriage. From the time he turned eleven, his mother had schemed to set him up with any reasonable girl she could find to ensure the future of the line. 

Hugh hated all of them. It wasn't that they were unlikeable, but he had already been disinclined to marry, and no girl, no matter how nice she was, would change his mind on that matter. He already knew he was more inclined towards male intimacy, and he knew that marriage would deprive him of this. He had no hope he could ever be happily married to a woman; after all, his parents had not made a good marriage, and he was unsure he would manage it, either. He was not sure he could find it in himself to be intimate with a woman, and produce a son to succeed him. It felt too much like doing what his parents expected of him, and he would have none of that.

The last straw came during the summer he turned fourteen. His mother had brought some guests over, including a Baron from Gloucestershire, his wife, and their twelve year old daughter. Hugh had not paid much attention to them, thinking they were more fancy guests that his father was trying to impress.

But that was not the reason they were there. Hugh had not realised the Baron's daughter was intended as a future wife for him until he saw them out in the gardens with a priest. He had wondered why his mother had bothered to decorate the pavillion with ribbons and flowers. But at that moment, all he wanted to do was run as his father clasped him by the shoulders and marched him over to them.

"Ahh, here he is, as promised. One fine young wizzard to be betrothed. I think he will make a good match," his father said.

"What are you talking about? I am not marrying anyone, least of all this waif of a girl," Hugh protested. 

"You'll do as I say. This will be good for you. It's all been arranged. I'm sure you'll be very happy," his father said.

"I will never be happy while you are forcing me into marriage," Hugh said, struggling to break free. "I won't do it. I don't care if I am insulting our guests. I will not be married!" 

Hugh made one last attempt to break free and succeeded in pushing his father away. He was growing large enough to challenge him, though he was not quite man enough to entirely thrash him if he had need to do so. He was, at that time, still young and small enough to run fast, and as he finally broke free, shoving his father aside, he made for the stables. He did not spare the time to tack up, and took the nearest horse he could find to ride back to the Academy.

Hugh wished that had been the end of it. His father had not been pleased by his act of defiance, and had him thrashed for his trouble. He also sold Hugh's horse, leaving him bereft of his freedom. The profits from the sale had been paid to the Baron as compensation. But Hugh didn't care about the shame. He didn't care about their family honour. All it did was cut a deeper wound in his heart, adding to the melancholy and rage he already felt towards his father. 

The silence in the air slowly made the memories dissipate, though they did not lose their bite. It was difficult to imagine a more different end to the day. He had started out at the place he hated, and had come to a place of love, intimacy, and affection. He had shared sexual intimacy with both Sir Roy, and Lord Aylesford, and as he stopped by a tree, contemplating what they were now doing together, he felt his heart twist in his chest. He wanted to cry and rage, to run back to the house and take Sir Roy far away from him, where they would never be separated by anyone ever again. But he had no courage to steal from an Earl, let alone one who had the ear of the King.

"I am so utterly useless. Perhaps I ought to have drowned in that accursed lake," Hugh murmured darkly.

"If you had drowned, I am not sure I could have forgiven myself."

Hugh looked in the direction of the voice, not expecting company, and saw Sir Roy standing there a short distance away. Hugh wasn't sure why he was there at all, and the intrusion had left him wary and unsure. 

"What are you doing here? I thought you were with _your Lord_ ," Hugh sneered, his spite getting the better of him.

"I saw you leave, and I wanted to make sure you were alright. I hope the intimacy we shared just now was not too overwhelming for you. I would not wish to frighten you away," Sir Roy said.

"Why am I here? Why do you need me here when you have him?" Hugh asked.

Sir Roy took a step forward. "You're here because I love you. Isn't that why you wanted to be here?"

Hugh could feel his anger rising, but tried not to let it overwhelm him. His frustrations, however, were not so obedient. "I wanted to be here so I could be with you, not so I could watch you with - with him. My heart only belongs to you. How am I supposed to feel about this? You will stay with him, you will call it duty, but you will be lying, I am certain, because I am here to be laughed at. Why should it be any other way?" 

Sir Roy took his hand, trying to plead with him, but Hugh pulled away, upset and hurt. 

"I'm sorry, Hugh. I didn't think - I thought you would not mind such intimacy if I was there. I didn't think you would mind. You should have said something if you had not wished to stay. I would have let you go. I would have stopped it. Lord Aylesford would not have wanted you to have felt coerced into sharing intimacy with him. He is not like that at all," Sir Roy said.

"You and your devilry. Leave me alone. I need to be alone right now. I may not be back for supper," Hugh said. He took one last look at him and walked off.

Sir Roy did call out as Hugh left him, but he did not follow, for which Hugh was thankful. He needed time to himself. Walking through the woods, he was not going anywhere in particular. He just needed to walk, to let the silent air surround him. He thought about walking to town to the Catholic chapel, but it would be a long walk by foot, and the only other option involved stepping foot into a Protestant Church, which he was not partial to, either. But he would find no courage to confess, even if he went to a church. His silence was enforced by pressure he could not escape, and he needed to talk, or if he could not talk, keep silence with the empty world. And so, he walked to nowhere, the only option left to him.

There were many things he thought about as he walked, though only the night's events held his focus. The Earl had spoken of how welcome he was, how he would always have a place there, but how could that possibly be when he only cared for Sir Roy? Hugh felt like he had been used, that his presence had not mattered. He was a Catholic, and perhaps it was just that one thing that had caused him to be made fun of, insulted. Lord Aylesford knew well his feelings for Sir Roy. How he could have felt that was any indication he would be willing to be similiarly intimate with the Earl, he did not know or understand. 

Hugh had only ever wanted Sir Roy. He had never shown any inclination or desire for anyone else. Even through all the years where Sir Roy was unwilling to commit, Hugh never strayed. To have his devotion thrown back in his face that night felt worse than when Sir Roy left the Academy to become a soldier. It was far more personal, and the wound cut more deeply. 

After an hour, he finally stopped walking. He was far from Packington, but he didn't care. The night air was closing in, and he shivered a little, though it wasn't unpleasantly cold. He wasn't sure where he was, except perhaps that he had wandered to a field somewhere. There were no buildings, and all that surrounded him were flowers, and some trees. He turned around, and as he tried to remember where he had gone, so he might find his way back, he suddenly had no memory of the journey. 

"Pyrros," he whispered, conjuring a small lick of fire on his palm to light and warm him. "Little fire, show me the way back to Packington."

He blew on the flame gently before sending it into the air. It circled around him before it came and settled back onto his hand again. The flame was green now, indicating south, and the bearing to Packington. The flame changed colour depending on the direction he was seeking, and ss long as he kept the flame that same green colour as he walked, he would find his way back. 

Hugh wasn't sure how long it took to walk back. It seemed to take longer than it had taken to arrive at that field in the first place. Then again, he was not as angry and single-minded as he had been earlier, and now that he was not aimlessly tramping along, he was paying more attention to the route he was taking. He was walking slower, too, now that night had fallen, and it was harder to see where he was going. The flame helped, but not quite enough for Hugh to be sure he would not trip over in the dark.

Packington was mostly dark when he arrived. He had never felt so happy to walk back through the gardens to the house as he did that night, and as he let himself in through the servants' hall, excusing his presence to the maid who was still awake, he wondered whether he would be in any trouble for what he'd done. 

"Could I trouble you, miss, for some supper? Do not go out of your way, but I have come a long way, and I am rather famished. I should like to eat before I head upstairs to bed," Hugh said to the maid, hoping she would oblige.

A woman of about twenty five, she looked like she had been in service her whole life. "I hope you're not going to make a habit of this, sir. I can't be taking food from the kitchens all the time."

Hugh offered the kindest smile he could manage in his condition. "I am not that sort of gentleman. A simple supper, if that is all you can manage. I will pay if that is the problem. I would not wish to cause you to find yourself in strife because of me."

She curtseyed and shook her head, gesturing for him to follow. "It is no problem, sir. Follow me, sir."

She led him through to the kitchens, and offered him some bread, hard cheese, and wine. Hugh was quite sure that would do, though he declined the wine. He was not interested in getting drunk; it was an intolerable condition when his melancholy was at its worst, and he had no stomach for it at that moment. She offered hot tea instead, and that was more palatable. 

She did not speak as he ate, nor did Hugh expect her to. Hugh thought it was bad enough that he was eating in the servants' quarters. He didn't want to make any more trouble by fraternising with the staff. He did not think Lord Aylesford would think too highly of him if he found out. He did not stay long. 

Once he had eaten, he returned to the house, making his way to bed. As he came to the hall outside the Earl's room, he hesitated. Did he even want to intrude there again? No, he had a room for himself, and he decided to go there instead, crossing the corridor to the room opposite the Earl's room, where he found a bedroom prepared for him. He noticed his possessions had been moved here, as if in anticipation that he would be staying in this room after all. It hurt, but at the same time, he was glad of it. He would unpack in the morning. For now, he would sleep, and try to decide whether he really belonged in this large, strange house.


	3. Chapter 3

Hugh found Sir Roy waiting for him the next morning, knocking softly on his door as he called to him, asking permission to enter. Hugh felt tired and his body was sore from all his walking the previous night. He was still feeling conflicted about what had happened, but perhaps he might trust himself to talk to Sir Roy about it. It might not provide him with answers, but at the very least, it might help him sort out how he felt about it to the point where he might be able to talk to Lord Aylesford, if it came to that. 

Sir Roy held back as he greeted him, unsure, and he stayed outside on the threshold, waiting to be invited inside. "I am sorry to intrude, but I thought I ought to make sure you were alright. I was not sure you would be back, but I am glad to see you here. You are well?"

Hugh sighed. "I am as well as I can be, given the circumstances. I am sorry for my harsh words last night. I was not in my right mind. Come in, my friend, we ought to talk."

Sir Roy bowed his head to him as he entered. Hugh asked for some tea to be brought up before he joined Sir Roy, closing the door behind him, ensuring they would have some privacy. 

Hugh had not particularly taken in the contents of the room, apart from his possessions, before he had gone to bed. In the daylight, he noticed his room was much the same as Sir Roy's, with a bed, desk, bookshelves, and a pair of armchairs. He did not think he was lacking anything Sir Roy had, a detail he appreciated. He ushered Sir Roy over to the chairs, sitting in front of the fire, and they sat together in silence for a moment.

"I am sorry for last night. I should not have assumed you would have wanted that sort of intimacy with Lord Aylesford. I fear I have jeopardised our future together, and I very much wish to make amends. If you wish to move back to the Academy, I would not stop you," Sir Roy said.

Hugh dismissed his words. "No, my friend, I reacted badly. It is not your fault. I do not wish for you to think I did not enjoy myself, though. I understand better why you love Lord Aylesford. He is indeed an attentive and skilled lover, and I do not blame you for falling for him. I am still not sure how I feel about this, though. I feel I have betrayed you by what I have done."

"You have not betrayed me in the least, Hugh. I am sure Lord Aylesford does not wish to force you to be his lover if that is not what you wish to do. Do not feel you must force yourself to be with him. He is not that kind of man," Sir Roy said. "I certainly would not wish for you to be intimate with him if it only distresses you."

"I think I should not like to be present again when you are together, if that is not too much to ask. I do not feel comfortable with that at this stage. You forget, Roy, that the Earl is a stranger to me. He is not a close companion to me, such as he is to you. I do not know his heart yet. You say he is a good man, and I am inclined to believe you, but I would rather take my time and get to know him better before I decide if I desire a similarly intimate relationship with him," Hugh said. "He will not be angry if I say this to him? He will not send me away?" 

Sir Roy shook his head. "I do not recall that sort of intimacy being a required part of your Apprenticeship with him, Hugh. I am sure he will not be troubled by it. He is a kind man, Hugh. He will not hate you for your decision."

"Are you sure? I am still not sure about my place here. I would not wish to presume-"

"Lord Aylesford is not that kind of man, I assure you. You must learn to trust him, and trust yourself," Sir Roy said.

"I am sorry for my insecurities. I am still learning to accept all he is willing to offer to me. I am not used to anyone but you caring about me. It is taking some time to adjust to that. I am sure it will happen in time, but right now, I am not sure of anything, and seeing you together was not something I expected to witness, not so soon, and I am ashamed to admit I felt jealous and abandoned. I felt like I was being humiliated, and I am sure that was not the Earl's intent, but how am I to know that? I do not know him at all," Hugh said.

Sir Roy touched his shoulder gently. "I am sorry for what happened. I did not wish to drive you away, and I am sure Lord Aylesford did not wish to do so, either. Come, talk to him. I am sure he will not hold it against you."

"Not yet. Let me have some tea and refresh myself first. Stay with me, Roy, just for a while? You are the only person I know here. I would like to reassure myself that I still have a friend with me in this big house," Hugh said, reaching for his hand.

"Certainly. My Lord does not require my services in the morning, particularly not while we are staying here. I only act as his valet when we are away. Are you going to sleep in here for the moment? I wasn't sure if you would wish to share my bed last night, so I had your things moved in here for you, in case you needed your own space, at least while you get used to living here," Sir Roy said.

"I have not decided yet. I think I will keep it, though. Could we perhaps stay here if we are going to share a bed? We are close enough to the Earl's bedchamber that I do not think I would be keeping you away from him," Hugh said.

"I am sure that will be no problem, Hugh. I think it would be good to have our own room. I would not feel as if I am being a Lord's companion in here," Sir Roy said.

"It is not that I think your room is inadequate, either, but I think I need perhaps a little more physical distance between us, so it feels like our space, and not Lord Aylesford's space. I am sure I will not always feel so strange about it, but that is what I need, for now, if you are willing to indulge me, Roy," Hugh said.

"No, I understand you perfectly. I am sure Lord Aylesford will not mind at all. If you are more comfortable with this arrangement, I will agree to it. I keep forgetting how unusual this household is. It must seem so strange to you. No wonder you are so troubled," Sir Roy said.

"I am not troubled by it, it is more..." Hugh paused, trying to find the right way to describe it. "It is more, I am living with strangers, and if this were a normal household, perhaps that would be no problem, but things are different here, and I am not sure what I am meant to do, or how to fit into this place. The rules here are ones I am not familiar with."

"You do not need to apologise, Hugh. You have only been here one night. My Lord would not expect you to know everything right now. I suggest you do talk to him, though, because he will make things easier for you, if that is what you need. I can assure you he only wishes the best for you," Sir Roy said.

"I will talk to him later today. I do not think I am adverse to sharing intimacy with my Lord, if I feel I know him sufficiently well to know he is not attempting to harm me. I did enjoy my time with him last night. But it did feel very overwhelming, given I had only arrived that day," Hugh said.

"It is no problem, Hugh. I rushed into things with you and the Earl, and I apologise for any offence I caused. I did not wish to hurt you. I just wanted you to feel welcomed," Sir Roy said.

"I did feel welcomed, but you did not have to use sexual intimacy for that, my friend. My relationship with the Earl is not like yours," Hugh said.

"I understand now, Hugh. I am sorry. I will not make the same assumption again," Sir Roy said.

The tea arrived at that moment, and Hugh's mood improved. With the fire stoked, and the room light and cheery, Hugh began to settle. Sir Roy's company was appreciated, and they talked about their magical projects as they broke their fast with tea and scones. Hugh didn't think they'd spent any time like that for many months, and it was a welcome return. Perhaps their relationship was more resilient than he thought it was.

* * *

Later that day, Lord Aylesford took Hugh down to his new workshop. The building was a small solid building, situated close to the kitchens. It contained a fire pit, some wooden benches, a stool, and some basic tools. The only indication this workshop was only used for magic was the solid mahogany chest against one wall that had magical symbols carved into it. 

"I know it isn't much, but I hope this will be space enough for you to work. I thought you would appreciate a place of your own to experiment and work on your project while you are living here. My cook will avail you with any ingredients you desire, within reason. Do not empty my pantries, my friend! But that is the only restriction. You may make use of anything you find in here," Lord Aylesford said.

"Oh, my Lord. This is more than I could accept, but thank you. I will appreciate having a workshop here. It is a little far to travel to the Academy every day to make use of their workshops. This will save me the journey," Hugh said.

"That is the purpose in giving you this space, yes. You'd better not let me down, now. I don't just let anyone use this place. You may find Sir Roy here too. He is also allowed to use it, but as his project is more theoretical, you will probably make more use of it than he will. If there's anything you need, please let me know, and it will be made available, if that is possible," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh could not help bowing his head out of gratitude. "I thank you, my Lord. You have been most kind and generous to me."

Lord Aylesford smiled and brought an arm around his shoulders. "Now, why don't you show me this pebble magic of yours? I'd love to see it cast." 

"I would need to collect supplies, and bring down my spell books, but of course, my Lord. I would be happy to cast it for you," Hugh said.

"Good man. Get what you need and we'll begin. I would relish a chance to watch you cast. If you are half as good as your father, you will go far indeed," Lord Aylesford said.

For a moment, Hugh felt a small sensation of pride, though it seemed he could only feel proud of his father if he was just a wizzard. Still, to think he could be as good a wizzard as his father did make him feel like he might actually achieve something. 

A quarter of an hour later, everything had been gathered, and the spell well underway. The large pot sat over the fire, watched closely by Hugh. This would be the first time performed the spell for anyone other than Sir Roy, adn he was a little nervous. Indeed, he had only cast the spell twice before, and both had succeeded. But magic did not always go to plan, and perhaps his nerves had made him misgesture, just once, and the whole spell would be ruined. Even though he'd gone over every gesture before he'd cast the spell, and made sure he had everything he needed, there was always a chance something would go wrong.

Lord Aylesford watched carefully as Hugh prepared the ingredients. "What are you intending to make for me?"

"Spiced buns, my Lord. It is the only food, so far, that I have managed to create. But I hope one day to make other foods," Hugh said. He gestured over the last ingredient and threw it in the pot. "Choose me six pebbles, my Lord."

Lord Aylesford reached over to the pile of pebbles they had collected and picked out six of them. He chose ones he felt were the roundest, and handed them to Hugh. "Do you just throw them in too?"

Hugh shook his head. "No, my Lord. They require magic to aid the transformation. Like so." 

Hugh set the pebbles down on the bench nearby and gestured the correct spells over them. There was a brief flash of light, the only indication that anything had happened. The pebbles were then put into the pot with everything else. With one last gesture over the pot, the spell was finally completed. Flames engulfed the pot, though they seemed, to Hugh, to be more intense than he had expected, and they were not quite the right colour. Nevertheless, Hugh waited a moment for the flames to do their magic before extinguishing them. He then reached in to see what he'd been left with. 

"Has it worked?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh pulled out what looked like three small loaves of bread. He frowned. "I don't know. That's not what I wanted. I wonder if they still taste right. I have not had this spell fail me yet."

Carefully, Hugh pinched a small corner off one of them and took a bite, hoping it would taste just like the buns. Almost immediately, he scrunched up his nose. 

"Oh, my Lord, that is not right. No, no, no. I have clearly done something wrong there. I am sorry, my Lord. I have not had it fail like this before," Hugh said.

"Well, you will just have to keep trying. Was there anything different you did this time that might have affected it?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh thought a moment. "I do normally only use two pebbles. Perhaps the spell was not tailored to six. I thought the number of pebbles would not matter. It has always worked with two before. That may be the problem." 

"Would you allow me to cast it? I would like to try it for myself," Lord Aylesford said.

"Certainly, my Lord." Hugh retrieved his magical journal from the bench and handed it to the Earl. "That is the spell there. I trust you understand the gestures?" 

Lord Aylesford read over the spell. "This uses quite advanced magics, Hugh. How did you get away with using these magics without initiations?" 

Hugh shrugged. "I honestly do not know, my Lord. I was surprised it worked at all when I first tried it." 

Lord Aylesford offered a smile. "Perhaps it is your father's talent coming through. I know he was able to utilise magic in this way. Every element seemed to have a great affinity for him, and he could wield their magics with very little difficulty, and seldom did he need initiations. Indeed, I am sure that, in his case, initiations just made his power stronger. You seem to share that same affinity for the elements. I'm very impressed." 

"Thank you, my Lord," Hugh said, unsure what else to say to such praise.

"Come, let's set up again, and see if we can successfully cast it this time," Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord." 

It took another ten minutes to set the spell up once more. The old ingredients were discarded, and the pot cleaned out and prepared again. Ingredients were laid out on the bench, and once everything was prepared, they spent a moment going over every gesture. Hugh found it strange to think he was teaching a spell to a third degree wizzard, but the Earl did not make him feel uncomfortable in such a situation, and took his instruction as any attentive student would. Indeed, Lord Aylesford suggested two minor changes that might improve the spell, and Hugh appreciated the Earl's greater magical knowledge in these matters. Once they had practiced the new sequence of gestures a few more times, and Hugh had written it down in case it worked, Lord Aylesford began casting the spell.

It became quickly apparent that the spell was not going to work. As soon as the pebbles had been thrown into the pot, there was an explosion of flames that reached the ceiling, flames that burnt a lurid purple colour. A strong smell of burning permeated the room, and Hguh and the Earl made a strategic retreat once they'd finally managed to extinguish the flames. Standing outside, Hugh watched as black smoke drifted out towards them, the one final sign that the magic had not gone well. Hugh had to laugh, and Lord Aylesford joined him.

"My Lord, what have you done to my spell? It has never failed for me as spectacularly as it has right this moment!" Hugh said, incredulous.

Lord Aylesford sent a little wind magic to the workshop in an attempt to clear it. "You are not a real wizzard if you have not caused a few explosions while casting magic. And look, you have acquired a streak of gold in your hair for your troubles."

Hugh had not even noticed, but as he looked at his hair, he did indeed find a streak of yellow-gold now present, and it made his hair glisten in the sunlight. "Well, would you look at that. I was beginning to think I would have none at all." 

Lord Aylesford smiled and gently stroked his yellow hair. "Here's to many more." 

Hugh shivered at his touch, but he did not pull away. They were standing rather close to each other, but of course the Earl would not do something when they were so exposed. Perhaps he ought to talk to the Earl already about the previous night. He had been putting it off, not wanting to seem ungrateful. He still did not feel brave enough as the Earl gently brushed his cheek with the back of his fingers. 

"Let's leave that to air out. We will return to it later, I think. Shall we take a stroll in the gardens?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Certainly, my Lord."

* * *

"So, tell me, my friend, how did you sleep last night? Is everything to your liking?" Lord Aylesford asked as they headed down towards the formal gardens at the back of the house.

"I slept quite well, my Lord, yes. There is nothing I lack. Everything is more than adequate. It is more than I ever had at the Academy, nor even at home. I am most grateful for your generosity, my Lord," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford brushed him off. "Think nothing of it. Sir Roy tells me you have chosen the separate room I prepared for you, is that correct?"

Hugh nodded. "Yes, my Lord, just until I am used to this place. I do not mean to insult you or cause offence, my Lord, but you are a stranger to me at this moment. I do not know you as Sir Roy knows you."

"Yes, he did mention you were troubled by what we shared last night. I am sorry to have caused you any distress, and I am sorry for being presumptuous about how willing you were to be with us," Lord Aylesford said.

"It is not your fault. I ought to have made my feelings clear. I was carried away by lustful pleasure, which I do not regret, but if it is not too presumptuous to request that, perhaps, we could not engage in such a thing again, at least until I know you better than I do now?" Hugh said, finding his courage to speak.

"Of course, there is nothing wrong with what you ask for. I am glad you have told me now when we have just begun getting to know each other. I should like to think you would be honest with me, and not conceal the truth from me out of fear," Lord Aylesford said. 

"I did think at the time that it was what would be required of me, that you sought that from me as part of my Apprenticeship. I thought that if I refused you, I would be sent away, and I would never gain my degree. I was angry, jealous, and afraid, my Lord. I am ashamed to have thought such a thing. Sir Roy reassures me you are not the kind of man who would ask for such a thing, but I scarcely believed him. I hope you are not that kind of man, my Lord," Hugh said.

"I would not take advantage of anyone in such a manner, least of all you. You have been hurt too much. I could not risk damaging your potential, nor would I entertain being so cruel to you. No, do not be afraid. If that is not what you want, I will not ask you again to offer so much to me. We are still getting to know each other, after all," Lord Aylesford said.

"Indeed, that is true. I would like to clarify that I am not in any way averse to sharing intimacy with you again, but perhaps when we are better acquainted, and I am more clear about how we are all to live together, and love each other, without fracturing and breaking. I am only just beginning to love Sir Roy, and I do not wish to complicate our relationships to the point where I have lost you both," Hugh said.

"I understand. I would also like to clarify that in sharing such intimacy with you, I was merely seeking to give you pleasure, and to know you better. One can learn a lot about a man by taking him to bed, I believe. He is more true to himself than he is in polite society. I hope you are not above accepting pleasure, my friend. I would share it with you again, with no expectation of any ongoing relationship. Sexual pleasure for its own sake is not something to be ashamed about," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh stopped, then, his words asking for a reply. That part of him that would never let him leave the Catholic Church reminded him of how shameful and sinful it was to indulge in the pleasure of the flesh, let alone to do so with another man. He had been quite sure he had reconciled himself with that particular teaching, but perhaps not. Perhaps hearing it from a Protestant made it sound heretical such that he could not accept it.

Lord Aylesford turned to him. "Is something wrong, Hugh? I hope I have not offended you in any way."

"But it is a sin. This pleasure that we share - it is a sin. It is forbidden. We should not be doing such a thing," Hugh said, and even as he spoke the words, he was not sure how he felt about them, nor how much he really believed them. How much of this was a remnant of how he'd been brought up, rather than a belief he actually held? 

Lord Aylesford almost reached for his shoulder to reassure him, but thought better of it. "That is a fight you will have to win for yourself. And believe me, it has taken its toll on me, just as it has caused Sir Roy to suffer. All of us who are so afflicted have suffered for it. We all face that question, Hugh, and we all have to find our own peace with it. I cannot make you find that peace. You must find your own way through. Would you like to sit in the chapel for a while?"

"I am allowed in the chapel, my Lord?" Hugh asked, unsure.

"Of course. You are my guest here, and I would not bar you from entering, even though we are from different traditions," Lord Aylesford said. 

"Then, yes, perhaps it would be nice to sit for a while in the presence of God," Hugh said.

* * *

Hugh followed Lord Aylesford to St James' chapel. Hugh wasn't entirely sure he should step foot in it; he had never set foot in any Protestant church before in his life, and he was half afraid just doing so might be enough for a treason charge. Lord Aylesford sensed his hesitation, though, and gently ushered him inside.

"If you are worried you will be killed for this, you are mistaken. You won't be harmed for coming in here. Please, come and find sanctuary. We do worship the same god, do we not?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord, I suppose we do," Hugh replied, though he did stand there, bracing himself for a smiting. When it didn't come, he slowly began to relax. "Forgive me, my Lord. I am not used to being allowed anywhere near such a place, let alone be able to step inside it."

Lord Aylesford kept a reassuring arm around him as they made their way down the aisle. "You have done nothing you need to seek forgiveness for, not from me, or from God."

Hugh wasn't sure how to respond, and so he said nothing. He had never been inside a church so grand before. It was true that he had attended funerals in Sir Roy's chapel, and had not been smote for it, but Hugh always felt that was different. Even then, he would never have gone into the chapel at any other time. The times when he stayed at Castle Bromwich Hall, he only ever made his prayers out in the gardens where he would not be seen or discovered. There was a small sunken garden, hidden behind a hedge row, where Hugh found isolation and peace. He could petition the Blessed Virgin in peace without fear of being found out, though he would only ever pray with his rosary in his coat pocket, counting the beads out one by one where no one could see them. He would not risk being seen with them. 

But at least Sir Roy's chapel had been quaint and small in its grandeur. Lord Aylesford's chapel was on a completely different scale. Hugh had never been inside a Catholic church that was so grand, let alone a Protestant one. The ceiling was vaulted and was perhaps two or three storeys above them. Large columns stood beside the walls, and ornate decorations, mosaics, and stained glass made the building shine. There were things missing, of course, that Hugh would have expected to see in a Catholic church, but he was not in familiar territory, not at that moment. 

"Why would you let me into such a place?" Hugh breathed, unwilling to raise his voice.

"Why would I bar you from it? While you live at Packington, you have free use of everything here. That includes the chapel. It is still a house of God. I just did not wish for you to think you could not come here because you were forbidden. I tell you, you are free to enter here whenever you wish. If anyone bars you, tell them you have my authority and permission to enter. My word is law on these lands. If I say you can enter this church, so be it you will be free to enter. I do not expect you to attend services, of course, if that would make you uncomfortable, but you would be more than welcome to pray in here at any other time, should you desire it," Lord Aylesford said.

"I feel you are offering me too much, my Lord, but I thank you for your kind offer. I cannot imagine praying in a place like this. All I have ever had was a room above a public house in town. The only decoration was a crucifix, hidden at all other times in case we were ever discovered. If we met at night, the drunks would conceal our prayers from being heard by people passing by. But it is the only church I have ever known. Praying in here will take some getting used to, my Lord," Hugh said.

"I will not insist that you pray in here at all if it does make you uncomfortable, but I thought you ought to know you are welcome in here while you are living here with us. I would not be offended if you prayed elsewhere," Lord Aylesford said.

"I thank you, my Lord. I will consider it, of course. May we go somewhere less intimidating? I am feeling rather more overwhelmed in here than I had thought," Hugh said.

"Of course. Would you permit me to show you something first?" Lord Aylesford asked.

Hugh wasn't expecting the request. "What is it you wish to show me in here, my Lord?"

"Come, it is through here," Lord Aylesford said, gesturing towards the front of the church.

Hugh followed him down the aisle, and then to the left and through a small door in the side. Lord Aylesford led him up a narrow winding staircase before leading him into a small, plain chapel within the church itself. The walls were bare and the floor covered with drab terracotta tiles. A shrine, an altar, with a prayer rail was at one end, and on the wall was an image of St James. 

"Why do you show me this room, my Lord? Is there something special about it?" Hugh asked.

Lord Aylesford went to the altar and took out a box sitting just to the side, hidden from sight. He took out a dark-stained length of rope and lay it down before the altar. Hugh knew what he was about to do just as he removed his shirt, and something hurt deep inside as he saw the scars - deep and awful, covering his back. 

"My Lord, no. Do not make me watch such a thing," Hugh said, and he moved beside him to still his hand.

"I was not going to harm myself, not now. I have not done this to myself for many years. I was your age, or just a bit younger, when I started. I was trying to be a good son, make a good marriage, and all I wanted was to spend my life with another man, one I truly loved. I think I spent most evenings in here after supper. I was trying to beat it out of myself, that urge to lie with men, but I didn't succeed. All I did was scar my back," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh looked at him, then. His words struck him, as if it had never really occurred to him that anyone else might suffer the same affliction he suffered. Hugh had never particularly sought to hurt himself because of it, though, but he had spent most of his life rebelling, and refusing to apologise for it. His sexual desires were not something he was normally ashamed of. 

"Do not say such a thing. How can someone as beloved as you suffer such great pain?" Hugh murmured.

"I suffered, because I believed it would help. If I shed blood for Christ, perhaps one day it would be enough to atone for my sins. I do not believe that anymore, but it took me a long time to drive that belief out of my head. One day, Hugh, you will find your peace with your faith. It will not hurt so much as it does right now," Lord Aylesford said.

"It doesn't - hurt, my Lord. I don't know what you're-"

Lord Aylesford turned to him. "You would not have denounced it as a sin just now, if you did not hurt."

Hugh stared at the floor, unsure what to say. "But I don't - I do not know if I even believe it myself. Why do I still cling to this faith, anyway? It was my father's faith, my mother's faith. I rejected everything they tried to teach me, except this. Why is it so hard to shake, my Lord? I do not want to keep feeling like this."

"I cannot answer that for you. It is something you need to work out for yourself. You would not turn away from God, would you?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh thought a moment, and shrugged, unsure. "You just never stop being Catholic, my Lord. You can never leave, not really. I could convert to Protestantism, and I would still feel conflicted. I would feel like a traitor."

"Turning away from the Catholic Church is not the same as turning away from God, but I do not think you are quite at the stage yet where you are able to accept that," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh winced. The Church and God were indeed one and the same in his mind. He had also not chosen to be Catholic; it had been chosen for him, and it had been the one place where he had found love, apart from Sir Roy. Perhaps that was why he found it so hard to let go of. 

"May we return to the gardens, my Lord? I need some space to think," Hugh said after a moment's thought.

"Of course. We will go walk the gardens again, I think. This may be the last of the fine weather before winter sets in, and I should like to enjoy it," Lord Aylesford said.

Leaving the small chapel behind, Lord Aylesford led him back outside. Hugh felt better for being in the fresh air again. It wasn't that the church was making him feel unwelcomed, but he was not used to the awesome power of a sacred space so large as that, and it made him feel dreadfully unpleasant. He had too many thoughts in his head, and he did not know how he would resolve them all.


	4. Chapter 4

The next month passed with relative speed. Hugh had not seen as much of Lord Aylesford as he had expected, as he had spent two weeks in London. Sir Roy had been left behind at Packington to work on his magic, and Hugh appreciated having someone there that he knew. It was not that he could not have coped on his own with the ladies present, but at least he and Sir Roy could share a bed most nights. 

Hugh had kept his separate room, and before Lord Aylesford had left, they had spent some time discussing sleeping arrangements so that no one felt they were being excluded. They had come to the agreement that Sir Roy would not accompany Lord Aylesford while he was travelling, at least until both Sir Roy and Hugh were finished with their Apprenticeships. Lord Ayleford wanted to give the two of them time to be together, and he felt the constant travelling would distrupt that. Lord Aylesford also agreed that he would not call Sir Roy to his bed when he was at home, which made Hugh feel a little better about the situation. It wasn't that he was jealous, either, because he had a better understanding of what their relationship was. Lord Aylesford had made it clear that it was for Hugh and Sir Roy's benefit, to give them a chance to forge their own relationship in a space that was supportive and safe, away from prying eyes and men who did not understand. 

It took Hugh a long time to accept how great a concession that was. Lord Aylesford had stepped back to give them a chance, now that Sir Roy felt more confident in his capacity to love him. Hugh had always hoped they might one day be able to love each other like that, but Sir Roy had always been so hesitant and conflicted about being so intimate with him, Hugh had almost given up hope that it would ever happen. But that was not the case anymore. 

Sir Roy lay beside him in bed, willing to be close to him. They shared soft kisses, Sir Roy held him close, and Hugh didn't feel like he was an unwilling partner anymore. Knowing they had the space to explore and see where their relationship might go had given them permission to be intimate in ways they had never been before. Indeed, they had consummated their relationship at last, and Sir Roy had finally allowed sex between them. It had been gentle and lingering, and Sir Roy had enjoyed being with him without feeling ashamed. Hugh was a little upset that their first sexual encounters had not been with each other, but it was not something he could particularly change, and knowing how Sir Roy had grown able to love him after being with Lord Aylesford, Hugh was not willing to complain. Sir Roy was more comfortable with himself now in a way that Hugh had never seen before, and Hugh silently thanked Lord Aylesford for what he had done. 

They would begin each morning with prayer, finding a way to worship together that did not cause conflict. One day, Hugh would lead their prayers, and perhaps they would pray the Rosary together. Another day, Sir Roy would lead, and Hugh would find himself praying in English. Sometimes, they would compromise and use both Latin and English. The very act of praying together, and finding common ground in God, had lessened the sense that their Churches were entirely at odds with each other. Hugh felt, at the very least, that he could remain friends with at least one Protestant, and not feel like he would go to Hell because of it. 

They spent most days working on their projects, either at Packington, or at the Academy. Hugh spent more time at Packington, trying to make his pebble magic work. Sir Roy, conversely, spent most of his time at the Academy. He had work to do with Lord Capill whenever he was free, and there were books in the library he could not access anywhere else. Hugh did feel a little sad that they did not spend as much time studying together as they used to, but their projects were quite different, and as Hugh had already exhausted the resources the Academy library could offer, he did not see the point in spending any time there. So he spent his days casting his spell over and over again, failing more often than not, and rewriting the spell to try again the next day. It was tiresome, but at least it was not boring.

Lord Aylesford had also given them work to complete while he was away that was intended both as an aid to their projects, as well as further tuition in the higher magics. They would have to complete their first initiations into the second four Elements of Electricity, Mineral, Animal, and Vegetable by the next summer, and part of the reading they would need to do was intended to prepare them for this. Sir Roy had already been initiated into Electricity and Mineral, but Hugh had not had any of his yet. They would be arranged throughout the coming months, ensuring there would be time to recover from them.

Hugh was not entirely looking forward to his initiations. He'd been reading the initiation logs in the Academy library, and some of the things that other students had experienced did not sound entirely comfortable. The initiations he'd already had into the first four Elements of Air, Flame, Water, and Earth, did not sound as terrifying as meeting Mineral, or perhaps encountering a hostile face of Animal. Elemental initiations were not intended to cause physical harm, but Hugh doubted that was entirely guaranteed with the second four. If he had not cared so much about acquiring his first degree, he would have preferred to sit them out. Initiations into the second four, however, were required for all Apprentices, and there was no way to get out of them. It was a requirement of graduation. Hugh did not much like this, but he wished to graduate more than he feared initiations.

* * *

Sir Roy was sat in the library at the Academy, pouring over an old magical tome. He was studying chants in a bid to find a way to make music magic work with more than just his flute. He had met with Lord Capill earlier in the day, and had discussed possible experiments and methods to try in a bid to make other instruments work. Sitting up, he set the book aside. He was getting nowhere. 

He stretched, and got up, taking a walk across the room. He'd been working at this all week, and hadn't had any success. Standing by the window, he wondered if he was just working too hard. He'd barely spent any time at Packington, and he was beginning to think he was losing touch with the place. 

"I wonder how Hugh's been progressing. I ought to go back home and spend some time with him. If my Lord is so willing to give us time together, I would be foolish to spend my time reading old books. Perhaps the ride home will offer some inspiration," Sir Roy said to himself.

After a moment's thought, Sir Roy returned to his desk and packed up his things. The old book was returned to its shelf, and with his research notes safely stashed in his bag, he left the library to head to the stables. Castella was happy to see him, and she was eager for a walk. He brushed her down and saddled her up, and with one final look back at the Academy, he headed back home to Packington House.

* * *

Sir Roy arrived back at Packington to find Hugh and Lord Aylesford heading towards the bath house. Lord Aylesford waved him over, and Sir Roy rode over to them, wondering if Lord Aylesford was about to show Hugh the magical wonders of the bath house. 

"Ahh, you are back just in time, Sir Roy! Come, you look like you could do with a dip in the baths before supper. You have been working too hard, my friend, and it has made you grouchy," Lord Aylesford said, offering a teasing smile. 

Sir Roy could not help but acknowledge his words as he dismounted. "You know me too well, my Lord. I think the baths are just what I need. I have been pouring over old books all week."

"Leave Castella with the groom, and join us. We will meet you in the tepidarium," Lord Aylesford said. 

"Yes, my Lord. That would be wonderful," Sir Roy said.

Sir Roy waited until they went inside before leading Castella over to the stables, leaving her in the capable hands of Lord Aylesford's groom. He smiled as he walked back to the bath house, remembering all the times he'd spent in there with Lord Aylesford. He wondered if similar things might happen this time with Hugh. 

As it happened, they were still in the apodyterium getting undressed when Sir Roy arrived, and he willingly joined them, taking the opportunity to look upon both their naked bodies. Lord Aylesford waited for him to finish undressing, leaving his clothes with the servants, before leading Sir Roy and Hugh through to the tepidarium where the warm baths were.

"Come on in, my friends, and let the healing waters take away your stress," Lord Aylesford said as he stepped into the pool. 

Sir Roy took Hugh's hand. "You will enjoy this, Hugh, I promise you."

Hugh only half-heard him, as he was still awestruck by the building itself. He had never been inside the bath house before, and seeing the Roman art and sculptures around the place astounded him. As they entered the tepidarium, he came face to face with the large statue of Mars at the other end of the room. He was overwhelmed by its power, and had he not been such a devout Catholic, he felt he might have given in to the urge to bow down before the war god and offer praise and reverence. Instead, he just felt awed, unable to voice the sensations flooding his body at that moment.

"My Lord, this building is astonishing. How have you created such a jewel?" Hugh murmured.

"With great care and attentiveness, Hugh. You will not fully appreciate it staring at it, however," Lord Aylesford chided. "Anyone would think you did not wish to spend time with us."

Understanding the implied meaning in Lord Aylesford's words, Hugh stepped into the pool, Sir Roy right beside him. The water was pleasantly warm, and Sir Roy boldly drew Hugh over to Lord Aylesford, allowing them to sit close together against the wall. 

"Sir Roy and I have shared many wonderful hours in here, my friend. You are welcome to use it any time you wish, either on your own, or with me or Sir Roy. It is utterly private. The servants are selected for their trustworthiness and discretion. They are never allowed into the bathing areas to ensure no one will know what we do here. I am telling you this, Hugh, so you understand the importance of this place and what you may do here," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh nodded, appreciating Lord Aylesford's gift in offering him use of this bath house whenever he liked. "I thank you, my Lord. It is greatly appreciated." 

"I think we should anoint him, my Lord, once we have had a chance to relax. It would be good to bless him and cleanse him spiritually while we are here, particularly as it is his first time," Sir Roy suggested.

"Yes, that sounds like an excellent suggestion. I have delayed too long in bringing him here, or I would have done so by now. Yes, we will relax in the baths, and let the water cleanse us, and then he will be anointed with holy oil and we will ask for God's blessings over him and his work. Yours, too, if you wish, Sir Roy," Lord Aylesford said.

"You wish to anoint me, my Lord?" Hugh said, intrigued. 

"Indeed, Hugh, I do. I am no priest, and I am no Catholic, but our God is the same God, and I will ask Him to bless you, nonetheless. Trust me, you will enjoy the process," Lord Aylesford said.

"If I am understanding your true meaning, my Lord, then I suspect I will," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford turned to him and cupped his cheek as he kissed him. Hugh still found it strange to be sharing such intimacy with him, but as he had grown to know the Earl better, Hugh felt more comfortable at his touch. He felt Sir Roy move in behind him, and pressed between the two of them, he tried to relax. 

Sir Roy had a chance to explore Hugh's body in much greater detail, and he noticed, for the first time, the scars he bore. He had seen them before, of course, particularly when they had washed together, but he had never quite noticed them in the way he did at that moment, as marks he was rather quite drawn to. He knew the stories behind them, though, which did take out some of the mystery of them, but what he didn't expect was how much greater it increased his arousal. He had been with Hugh when he had acquired many of his scars, and remembering those times made it all the better. Sir Roy found himself tenderly caressing a scar breaking across his right shoulder, knowing that was where he'd been caught by a piece of glass that had broken in the middle of an experiment, flying towards them both as their potion blew up in their faces. Sir Roy had his own scars from that particular incident as a memento.

Hugh's scars were different to Lord Aylesford's. Lord Aylesford was a seasoned warrior, his scars caused by blades and weaponry. Hugh was a wizzard, and his scars came from less violent causes. Sir Roy was intrigued to notice that Hugh had finally acquired a streak of colour in his hair, a bright yellow streak cut into his fringe. Sir Roy already had some of his own, and his hair was wild and uncontrollable, growing faster than it could be cut. Most wizzarding students acquired their first coloured streaks in their last two pre-Apprentice years, and it was generally lauded as a sign of maturity and progress. The more a young wizzard had, and the earlier he acquired them, the greater he was destined to be, or so everyone believed. 

Hugh turned around, then, and drew Sir Roy close to him. Sir Roy could not help brushing his wet hair away from his face as he offered a smile in return. It felt good to be with him, to know he was no longer so ashamed of his desires. Here, they were safe. Hugh would leave the issue of Lord Aylesford's affections for another time, particularly when his touch was reminding him why he had enjoyed himself so much before his jealousy had taken over. He was giving in, in spite of himself.

"You have a blaze of yellow in your hair, Hugh. I was beginning to think you were immune to them," Sir Roy said, gently teasing him.

Hugh could not help smiling at the reminder. "You have been too busy, lately, or you would have noticed it by now, my friend. It is such a glorious colour, is it not?" 

Sir Roy could not help brushing a finger along the yellow hair. It was still bright in spite of his wet hair. "It is indeed. It is like the sun has kissed your hair. I love it."

"I wish you had told me about this place sooner, my love. I hate to think you have been keeping secrets from me," Hugh murmured.

Sir Roy was astonished he would suggest such a thing. "I - I am a gentleman, Hugh. Do not expect me to tell you about the things I have done in here. I would not break my Lord's privacy like that, even when he is with us." 

Lord Aylesford came over to them and stroked Sir Roy's hair, running his hand down his back. Sir Roy shivered. "Come now, Sir Roy, I think you could elaborate just a little. Hugh ought to know what he is getting himself in for."

Sir Roy swallowed, both out of nerves and arousal. Hugh grasping his prick to stroke it didn't help, not when Lord Aylesford wrapped his arms around them both, bringing them all together. Lord Aylesford kissed each of them, and Sir Roy felt peculiar sharing the affections of them both. He didn't feel envious, but he could not quite isolate what it was he was feeling as he watched Lord Aylesford kissing Hugh hungrily. He wondered if Hugh would mean anything more to the Earl than a man to share intimacy with, rather than someone to love. He did not wish for the Earl to break Hugh's heart. Their relationship may become irreconcilable, and Hugh may end up in a ruinous mess if he put Sir Roy in a position where he was meant to choose either the Earl or his best friend. Sir Roy was not sure he could make that choice, nor did he wish to be placed in such a position.

That was when Lord Aylesford took their hands and led them out of the pool. With a quick gesture from Lord Aylesford, the building changed all around them. Hugh watched, amazed, as the Roman figures and artwork disappeared, and a grand Cathedral emerged. Figures of gods and heroes became figures of angels and saints, and the frescos now told the story of Christ. Hugh felt it was the most beautiful building he had ever been in. 

Hugh gazed at the ceiling again, awed and amazed. "My God. What kind of magic can do this? My Lord, this place is incredible," he breathed. 

"I'm glad you think so. I spent a lot of time and money on this place. Besides, if I am to anoint you, it would be better done in a more appropriate setting than a Pagan bath house. I like the Roman art because it is authentic, but there is a time and a place for it. I would rather not have Mars overlooking our activities," Lord Aylesford said. 

"Indeed, I feel more at home here. It is beautiful, my Lord," Hugh said.

Taking stock of the room around him, Hugh could barely believe it. And yet, it was all real. He reached out and touched the altar and felt solid, cold marble. Lord Aylesford stood beside him, taking the jar of sacred oil in his hand. Hugh saw it, and wondered if he would go to Hell for being blessed by a Protestant.

"I know we are of different faiths, Hugh, and I have no official authority to absolve you of any sin, but that is not the purpose of this anointing. I do it as an act of service. I do it so I may know my lovers intimately. I am the Magdalene washing the feet of Christ. Put aside our differences, just for a while, and allow me to serve you," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh seriously fought against it for a moment, trying to reconcile the use of sacred ritual in what was obviously not a sacred context. It would probably not even be a correct Catholic anointing, and Hugh scolded himself silently for even thinking that. He felt he was better than most Catholics in their attitudes towards Protestants, but it was still something he had to fight within his heart. Sometimes he wondered why he still clung so stubbornly to the Church of his parents when he had rejected everything else they had ever given to him. 

"Alright, my Lord. You may anoint me. Forgive me, Father, for the sins I am about to commit," Hugh said as he crossed himself, deciding to allow Lord Aylesford to anoint him with oil.

"How would you best like me to proceed? I have never done this for a Catholic before, and I can tell you are hesitant in your consent," Lord Aylesford said.

"How can you perform such a sacred ritual in such a carnal manner? I do not understand how this is not a sin," Hugh said.

Sir Roy approached him. "And yet, I have seen you desecrate the rosary in the name of carnal pleasure. You are not one to condemn us for this."

"Ah, yes, well, I..." Hugh trailed off, understanding the situation much more clearly. "I had not considered those aspects of it."

"It is an act of service, an act of love, Hugh. Would you feel better if I allowed Sir Roy to anoint you? I will recite blessings over you both, if that is what you would like," Lord Aylesford said.

That changed things for Hugh. He was able to understand why they did this ritual, and the very idea that Sir Roy would perform sacred acts on his body did arouse him, just a little. He still felt he was being quite shameful and sinful in thinking that, but he was willing to go along with it. 

"Well, Sir Roy, I have always loved how beautiful you look when you pray. Offer your sacred words to God. Cleanse me of the sin I have committed," Hugh said.

Sir Roy bowed his head. "Yes, Hugh, of course. I will bless every part of your body. I will care for you just as I have cared for my Lord."

Lord Aylesford handed the oil to Sir Roy, and then lit some incense upon the altar. Sweet smoke soon drifted up to Heaven, and the candles offered a soft light. Lord Aylesford stood at the altar and chanted scripture in Latin. The Earl had a sweet, clear voice, and Hugh could tell he was no novice at chanting. Hugh found it a highly effective act, shifting him right back to church, and the services he was used to. Sir Roy held up the oil and Lord Aylesford censed it with the incense, adding further blessings and purifications. Standing still, Hugh waited for Sir Roy to begin. 

"In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen," Sir Roy prayed as he made one final blessing over the oil.

"Amen," Hugh replied.

Hugh shivered as Sir Roy poured a little oil into his hands, repeated the blessing and made the sign of the cross on his brow, sealing it with a kiss. There was no sense of carnal lust in how Sir Roy was treating him. It was, as they had said, a sacred ritual. Sir Roy had that beautiful glow about him, the one Hugh always saw when he was praying. Hugh loved that in him, and knowing Sir Roy was praying over him felt incredibly touching as he anointed and blessed every inch of his body. 

Lord Aylesford's chanting echoed around the room, and Hugh appreciated how accommodating they were being towards his traditions. That, more than anything, helped Hugh relax into it. They might both have been Protestants, but they were blessing him like Catholics. That they cared enough to learn his Church's rituals and traditions, and be willing to use them with him to make him feel more included, was a highly generous gesture, one Hugh had never expected. 

Hugh smiled as he gazed down at Sir Roy, who was kneeling at his feet as he blessed his prick. There was so much tenderness about his actions. In spite of their arousal, Sir Roy did not provoke him. He merely marked the sign of the cross on the shaft, and the head, and kissed the marks chastely, before he moved on to other parts of his anatomy.

Once Sir Roy was done, he led Hugh over to Lord Aylesford. Sir Roy began chanting now, and Lord Aylesford asked his permission to bless him. Hugh nodded, silently, and watched, amazed, as Lord Aylesford repeated what Sir Roy had done. To see a Protestant Earl treating him this way...

Hugh had not felt so accepted in a very long time. There was nothing deceitful in the Earl's actions. Everything he did to him was done out of genuine love and affection, and Hugh drank it all in, feeling as if perhaps they might all find a way to love each other, in their own ways, in spite of their differences. Perhaps he had been wrong to think the Earl did not care for him, or was only using him as a distraction so he could have Sir Roy all for himself. He did not think any man would act like this towards someone they did not love.

Lord Aylesford ended their ritual with a kiss on his lips, bringing Hugh into a soft kiss. Sir Roy gently circled them, wafting incense over them by way of a final purification. All Hugh was aware of was Lord Aylesford standing before him. He smiled softly, kindly, and there was no judgement in his expression.

"I know it was not a perfect service, but I hope it was enough to bring you peace, my friend," Lord Aylesford said, his voice soft and comforting.

"It was beautiful, my Lord. Thank you," Hugh said. "I do not understand why you even care for me. Some days, I do not even know why God cares for me. But I have seen proof of your love for me and I dare to accept it is genuine. I have never felt this way before, to feel so utterly blessed and loved. I do not think I deserve it. Please allow me time to adjust to this. I am not used to this feeling."

"Yes, I worry about your bouts of melancholy, my friend. I fear it will get in the way of your quest for love and acceptance unless you conquer it. I have seen it destroy men less able to bear it than you. Use God's light to push it away," Lord Aylesford said.

"I will do my best, my Lord. It is hard, but you have had such patience with me. I cannot believe I will never drive it away, not while I have you with me," Hugh said.

"I hope you will, in time, come to realise that you are more than just a student of mine. You are loved and cherished, and yes, you are wanted here. I know it is hard to understand, but it is true. I want you here with me, and with Sir Roy. Stay, be loved, and allow God to sing through your magic," Lord Aylesford said.

And for the first time, Hugh really felt it. Emotion and sensation flooded his body, and it had finally begun to sink in. He was loved. The Earl's words were not meant to soothe and coddle, meaningless drivel to ease his worries, but genuine words expressed with love. Hugh felt, for the first time, God's grace blessing him. There was no sense of judgement, no condemnation, no exile. Just love. All that existed then was love. 

Lord Aylesford held him gently. Sir Roy stood close, an arm around him. They could all feel it, that sensation of love flowing all around them. No one spoke. They stood together, naked and still, feeling the Holy Spirit binding them together. 

At one point, Hugh began chanting Psalms of praise and joy. His voice was hesitant and soft, and he was not used to chanting the praise Psalms, but he felt it then, as he chanted the words. It was magic more powerful than any he had ever encountered. In that moment, Hugh felt God touch his heart, accepting him with all his imperfections. He wept with joy.

* * *

They remained in the bath house for another hour. Lord Aylesford brought Hugh and Sir Roy into the small hidden room behind the altar, and there they remained, lying in each other's arms, talking softly, but more often allowing the silence to speak for them. There were brief moments of intimacy, fleeting kisses, and gentle caresses, but it was not needed. There was no desire for it, not at that moment. Just being with each other was all they needed.

Supper was taken in the Earl's private rooms. The three of them ate together, allowing themselves to spend time together. Away from the rest of the household, the night was theirs alone. Hugh did not feel like he was different, not anymore. Yes, he was lacking in land and title, but the love he had was worth more than the accursed manor his father owned. There had never been any love there. It was a cold, lifeless building. He was sure he did not want it, even if his father changed his mind and offered it to him. Indeed, Hugh decided that he would rather demolish the place and sell the land rather than inherit it. He knew what unconditional love really felt like now, and it had given him hope. He would become a wizzard, and make his own name for himself. His fortune would not come from his father, but from his own effort. 

They shared the Earl's bed that night; it was more than large enough to accommodate them all. Hugh found himself in the middle, with Sir Roy on one side, and Lord Aylesford on the other. They exchanged kisses, and as they lay together, pleasure was taken in slow, languishing moments. It was the closest thing Hugh had ever come to experiencing sexual intimacy as a sacred act. It felt sacred to him, expressing his love and God's love to these two men he had come to love, and who loved him back. 

He would remember that night for a very long time whenever the darkness threatened to overwhelm him. It was not a perfect cure, but it helped him find his way out. It was a shining beacon, one he needed when everything around him seemed bleak and hopeless.

* * *

Hugh glanced back at the bed as Lord Aylesford slept, watching him from where he stood by the window. Sir Roy was by his side, and after a moment's contemplation, Sir Roy led them out to the balcony as quietly as he could manage. The moonlight was bright that night, offering pale white light to brighten the world. Carefully closing the door, Sir Roy left Lord Aylesford to sleep. 

"It has been an interesting night," Hugh murmured, watching as the breeze danced through the leaves of the trees in the distance. 

Sir Roy glanced at him. "I suppose it has been, yes."

"I never thought I would feel God's kindness. I had lost all hope that He cared for me. And yet, with Lord Aylesford, I felt it. God was there. I was blessed with His grace, and I am still trying to understand why," Hugh said.

Sir Roy couldn't help smiling. "Lord Aylesford is like that. Sir Richard once told me that Lord Aylesford's love will forever change you, and I believe him. Indeed, I have experienced it for myself. You know well what I was like before I met him, when we were still at the Academy together. I would not be the man I am today without him."

"I do still find myself feeling envious that you share his love. He was the one who brought you peace with your own desires. I always thought I would be the one to do that, to show you the love we could share. But now that I have been with him too, I know better why you love him. If you had to be bound to any Lord, I would rather it was Aylesford. At least I know he will be kind to you," Hugh said.

"You still speak as if you are excluded. Is everything still alright between us, between you and the Earl?" Sir Roy asked.

"No, it is not that. I know why you desire him, Roy. I have desired him myself. But you find yourself loving him in a way I do not. It is not what I need from him. I am not sure how to explain this to him, though. I feel as if I am disappointing him. I still love him, Roy, but not in the way you do. You are my lover, Roy, and he is my teacher. That is how it is for me. I do not need anything more from the Earl other than his friendship," Hugh said.

Sir Roy looked circumspect. "I do not know if Lord Aylesford meant for there to be romantic love between you, and I am not sure how he feels about you, but if friendship is what you need from him to be happy, to feel loved, then I am all for it."

It struck Hugh then that he may indeed be loved by two people in much the same way. He had not considered what that might really mean. Did the Earl really love him? Hugh had never thought to ask. He had always been too shy, and never felt like it was appropriate to ask. But perhaps that question was overdue. And yet, he felt he would be denying himself an equal relationship, that Sir Roy would always be more important to the Earl than he would ever be. 

"How does it not drive you to jealousy?" Hugh said after a while.

Sir Roy took a deep breath as he thought of a reply. "I needed to be with him so I could love you. I believe you need to be with him too, so you can love yourself."

Hugh looked puzzled as he thought about his words. "I had not thought of it that way. He has helped to push the darkness away. I never thought it would ever leave me. I feel ... more at peace with myself now."

"I'm glad about that, Hugh. You know I hate to see you when the darkness overwhelms you. I feel so utterly hopeless," Sir Roy said.

"I would not have survived them without you, my friend. Thank you," Hugh said, and he felt genuine gratitude for everything Sir Roy had ever done for him. "I know I have not always been so thankful of your friendship, but I do genuinely cherish it. I live because of you."

"I have something for you, Hugh. I was not sure of the best time to give it to you, but I feel now may be as good a time as any, since we are alone and unobserved," Sir Roy said after a short pause.

Hugh wasn't expecting anything, and looked over to see Sir Roy take a small box out of his coat pocket. "What have you there, my friend?"

"I wanted to wait until we were alone, without Aylesford being present, but now will do. I feel like we ought to have a formal way to show our companionship, because I fear you will only continue to feel excluded if you feel I am prioritising my Lord over you, is that not true?" Sir Roy said.

Hugh nodded. "I have always been aware that I was coming into an established relationship, one with formal boundaries and duties that did not involve me. I know it is wrong to feel like you do not care about me, because I know that is not true, but I do know I have felt useless, that I do not have a place here. I am not wanted or needed, except to study magic with my Lord. I am very aware of my station, Roy. I am very aware that, unlike you, I have no real standing in the world. I have been made to feel inadequate and oppressed for most of my life, and to be taken in by an Earl, and one who is close to the King, is overwhelming. I am not used to this elevation. I feel his love for me is genuine, and I do not doubt his plans for me, but I struggle sometimes to believe this is happening to me. I do not believe I deserve any of this. That is why it is hard to settle here. I still feel like an outsider."

Sir Roy stepped toward him and touched his arm gently. "You are wanted, and needed here, Hugh. Trust me. I know it has been hard for you, and many nights I have been afraid you would leave me, too scared to take this chance you have been given. And yet, still you stay with us. I am glad for it, because what I want to give you is a ring, like the one I wear for Aylesford. I do not want you to feel alone and abandoned anymore. I will not force the companions' ceremony on you if you do not wish to undergo such a joyous ordeal, but at least, wear a ring for me?"

Sir Roy opened the box then and showed off the two small silver rings. They were identical in every way from the simple band to the small equal armed cross embossed into the top. Hugh took the ring he was offered, and felt the magic imbued into it. There was love here, too. It fit right beside his Apprentice ring, and the two glistened beautifully in the moonlight. 

"Oh, Roy, you made these for us? Just for us?" Hugh breathed.

"I did, yes. This is just for us to mark our love. They are simple and discreet, no one will guess at their true meaning. I know it is hard with Lord Aylesford being part of our lives so intimately, but I did not want to neglect you. You mean so much to me, Hugh. We have spent most of our lives together, and I could not bear being without you. This ring symbolises my love for you, our love for each other. Not even Lord Aylesford can come between that," Sir Roy said.

"It's beautiful, Roy. I will never remove it, not for anyone," Hugh said, gazing at how the ring shone in the light. "What is this companions' ceremony you spoke of? Is that the rite you unerwent with Lord Aylesford?"

Sir Roy nodded. "That is the one, Hugh. It was a long day, but by the end of it, my relationship and role with my Lord had been formalised. I have his permission to undergo the rite with you too, if you would agree to it. It is a ritual that binds us together as companions in Christ. It is like a marriage, but based around friendship. But I would not force it on you. It is an Anglican service, after all. I was not sure if you would be comfortable with that."

Hugh had suspected as much. "I appreciate you taking the time to consider my feelings in this matter. I would not necessarily shun it solely because it is Protestant, but I am not sure it would be acceptable to undergo such an important rite that was presided over by a Protestant minister. But I cannot think of any other way to do the rite in such a way that we would both not be betraying our Churches."

"I, well, I did think that maybe Lord Aylesford could perform the rite for us. He is not a priest, I will accept that, but perhaps it is the best compromise, and we could revise the liturgy so that is is suitable for us both. But it will take time, and I was not sure you would be interested, so I have not done anything about it yet. I will be content with the rings, if that is what you would be most happy with," Sir Roy said.

"Have you, by any chance, got a copy of the liturgy? I am curious now and I would like to see just what may be problematic for me," Hugh said.

"Yes, I still have it. It is in my room. Come, we will go back inside. It is getting rather cold out here," Sir Roy said, shivering.

"Yes, of course. Let's return to the warmth," Hugh said.

* * *

Sir Roy led him quietly back through Lord Aylesford's room and through to his own adjoining room. Sir Roy lit a small fire in the hearth, and then began searching for the liturgy Lord Aylesford had given him before the ritual. looking in a drawer in his desk, he finally found it underneath some letters from his mother. Together with the rite, he gestured Hugh over to the armchairs, lit a lamp for them to read by. 

"This is the full rite. Lord Aylesford gave it to me the night before so I would know what was coming, and so I could memorise my responses. I am not sure how much of this will be acceptable to you, but at least consider it. I would rather have you knowingly decline than reject it without knowing what it may be," Sir Roy said.

Hugh took the pages from Sir Roy and began reading. It was a long ceremony, with many different parts to it. The companionship ceremony itself would need to be changed, Hugh thought. The vows, at least, would need to be rewritten. But there were not many other things he took issue with, which surprised him. He expected it to feel much more alien. But perhaps there was not so much difference in how they write liturgy. 

"And you performed this in St James'?" Hugh asked.

"Yes, we fasted and prayed in there for six hours before the ceremony itself. I would be willing to accept a different place if you desired somewhere more neutral," Sir Roy said.

Hugh thought a moment. "Does Lord Aylesford have a sacred grove at Packington?" 

"Oh, yes, he does. It is over the other side of the grounds, away from the church. Have you not been there, yet?" Sir Roy said.

"No, I have done all my work in his workshop. All I need is a fire, a cooking pot, and some ingredients. I do not need a sacred grove for my work. But it may be good neutral ground for us, if you were willing to accept it. Magic is our common ground, after all, not religion," Hugh said.

Sir Roy could see the truth in his words. "Was there anything else you found objectionable?"

Hugh shook his head. "I would rewrite the vows, and perhaps make some minor changes, but otherwise, it is quite acceptable."

"Would you be willing to undergo the ceremony, then? You do not have to answer me straight away. I know it is late, and we are both tired. I would ask that you think about it, perhaps make the changes you wish to make, and maybe in a week, we will discuss this further with Lord Aylesford and see what he thinks. I do not think we should rush this, and I do not want you to feel pressured to do this if it is not something your heart truly desires."

Hugh thought about his words a moment before he replied. "What if I wrote a completely new liturgy, one based around magic? We could call on the elements to bind us together, and to watch over us. If, as you and Lord Aylesford say, that God and magic are compatible, then it would be almost the same, just with different words and spirits involved. We could call on the elemental guardians as symbols of God's power over the natural world. Magic is where we work best. Let's not try to compromise over religious liturgy and do something completely different."

Sir Roy looked a little alarmed by his proposal. "That sounds a little heretical to me, Hugh. To worship the elements in such a way would not be permitted."

"I never said we would worship them. You said it yourself, remember? Magic is channelling God's will in the world. If God is love, and God is immanent and transcendent, why can He not be present in the elements we use to cast our magic? Why are they not His powers, such as the Angels are? I say we set up the grove as we are used to doing, and worship His power in nature through the elements. That power that we channel, that binds us together. We are wizzards, Roy. We have lived most of our lives in the Magic Academy. We are both Apprentice Mages. That, I believe, is where we are closest, not in church," Hugh said.

"What you speak of is heresy," Sir Roy said, indignantly, but he soon lost his anger, knowing he was not one to talk. "And yet, I know of what you speak. I felt it that night, when I lay with my Lord. I heard the song of God. Magic and God are one and the same. Let me think about it, Hugh. I will need more time to think about this than you will, I'd wager."

"Shall we go to bed, then? It is late, and perhaps some sleep will do you good," Hugh said.

Sir Roy nodded. "That sounds like an excellent idea. Here, I shall put the liturgy away, and we will go to bed."

"I assume we are sneaking back next door? He did invite us to sleep with him this night," Hugh said.

"He did indeed. That is what I meant," Sir Roy said.

With the liturgy safely stowed back in a drawer, Sir Roy and Hugh crept back into Lord Aylesford's room, trying not to wake him. With care and quiet, they slipped back in bed with him, and settled down for the night.


	5. Chapter 5

Hugh found his way to the sacred grove. It was, as Sir Roy had said, on the grounds opposite the chapel. It was a beautiful grove, if Hugh was being honest. It was a large circular space, some hundred and fifty feet across, made of the traditional nine woods, each planted in a circle to create a space to work. The grove was also surrounded by a high hedge row to conceal it from view. The trees looked quite old, and there was a smooth stone table sitting at the foot of both of the oak trees acting as an altar. In the centre of the grove was a small pergola in a Grecian style, containing a pedestal in the centre for fire. Lanterns were erected between each of the trees, used to provide light for magical workings at night. Stepping inside, Hugh felt the magical energy quite strongly. It was clear to him that Lord Aylesford did indeed use the sacred grove often, given how fresh the magical energy felt. 

"It is a beautiful grove, is it not, Mr McDowell?" 

Hugh turned to see Lady Aylesford and Miss Matthews entering the grove behind him. He bowed in greeting to them. "Yes, my Lady, it is. I am most charmed by it."

"It is my favourite place on the estate. I come here often. I like to cast with my companion," Lady Aylesford said.

Hugh could tell by her presence that Lady Aylesford was indeed quite a powerful magician, though how she had acquired such skill, he did not know. Women, as a general rule, were not taught magic. It was considered tantamount to inviting the Devil into the groves. 

"I did not know you had studied magic, my Lady," Hugh said, trying not to sound shocked by her admission.

She nodded coyly as she approached him. "Of course. My Lord would not leave us so vulnerable. He has taught us everything we know. I can protect myself if I am ever out alone with my companion. Of course, Sir Roy is now able to escort us if we need it. You too, Mr McDowell. You may have been troublesome while in the Watch, but you would offer your sword to protect us, would you not, if my Lord asked you to?" 

Hugh bowed his head. "Yes, my Lady, I would. I am ... I am not so reckless anymore. I have made my penance for my behaviour to my Lord. You would be safe with me, if you required my protection."

Miss Matthews joined Lady Aylesford, and Hugh noticed they held hands, loosely, in such a way that would not be considered impolite. He knew, of course, that they were lovers, but had never particularly made it his business to know what they did. It was not his concern, nor his place to speak of it.

"What brings you to the grove, Mr McDowell?" Miss Matthews asked. "We were about to cast some magic. You would be welcome to join us."

"If you must know, madam and my Lady, Sir Roy offered me his ring last night, and I am considering some way to formalise our relationship within this grove. It feels easier to reconcile magic as our common ground than to bridge our different religious traditions," Hugh said.

"He loves you very much, Mr McDowell. I do hope you will care well for him," Lady Aylesford said. "The grove would be an ideal place for such a ritual. My companion and I have found the magic we cast here has enhanced our relationship greatly."

"Shall I leave you alone then, madam and my Lady? I would not wish to intrude upon your magic casting," Hugh said.

Lady Aylesford dismissed his concerns. "No, I think I should like your company. Show me how good you are."

Hugh bowed his head to her. "Yes, my Lady. What would you like me to cast for you?"

"Set up the grove, as you were taught at the Academy. I want to see how strong your wards are," Lady Aylesford said. "After that, we will tune to Mineral. You have been tuned to the second four, have you not?" 

Hugh shook his head. "No, my Lady, not yet. I am waiting for Lord Aylesford to arrange for them to be performed."

"Well, if he is too busy, then I shall tune you instead. Heaven knows my Lord has enough to do. Come, set up the grove, and then I will introduce you to Mineral," Lady Aylesford said, though she did not sound as annoyed as Hugh feared she might.

"Yes, my Lady."

Hugh got to work, preparing to set up the grove as he'd been taught. It required a sequence of wards to be cast around it to protect those inside, as well as to enhance the magic cast within. Each tree in the grove had a particular guardian. Two great oak trees sat at each end of the grove, symbolising Time and Infinity. The oaks cast a dividing line for the circular grove, and the other eight woods sat evenly between them, filling in the rest of the circle.

Infinity's oak bore its symbol carved into the bark. Hugh had never really cast the wards for Infinity and Time before, not without tuned wizzards there to supervise. Nevertheless, he got to work, trying to remember the right way to cast. 

It took a moment to bring up Phoenix, the ever-eternal firebird that guarded the oak. Hugh could picture the bird in his mind, and he called to it, bringing forth the guardian as he set up the ward. He could feel the magic coursing through his body, taking over as he brought the grove to life. Phoenix cawled gently in his ear, circling the great oak as it settled in place, nesting on a branch. With the ward set, he turned to his right, following the circle clockwise. 

Willow was next. She was always tricky to cast because of her watery nature. She never liked being pinned down. Hugh had to fight hard for her cooperation as he called on Turtle to guard the ward. As he saw Turtle take its place beside the willow tree, Hugh couldn't help thinking that Sir Roy would have an easier time of it, given how good he was with Water magic. 

Ash, Rowan, and Hawthorn rounded off that side of the circle, with Water, Mineral, Flame, and Vegetable wards cast. Serpent, Dragon, and Horse had been invoked, and they waited by their respective trees, guarding the circle as it was cast. Hugh was pleased he had remembered how to cast the wards so well, given he had not really spent as much time in sacred groves as some of his fellow students had. He had never found it conducive to his style of casting and the magic he wanted to perform.

Time's oak was next, and it stood impressively tall opposite the oak on the other side of the circle. Hugh reached out and touched a hand to the trunk, feeling the old timeless spirit living within. It reached out to him, just a little, and Hugh saw the great Owl emerge regally from the shadows. It perched on a branch, eyes watching over everything that was happening. Hugh bid it welcome as he moved on to the last four trees.

The next four trees were birch, alder, hazel, and holly, corresponding with Earth, Animal, Air, and Electricity, respectively. As Hugh cast the wards, Mole, Dog, Sparrow, and Cheetah were brought forth to finish the circle. There was always a moment where Cheetah almost seemed to break free, threatening to dissolve the entire grove, but Hugh always managed to finish the wards just in time, keeping Cheetah in place. 

It was exhausting work, setting the grove up by himself. Normally, they were set up by a pair of wizzards, at the very least. Some rituals called for ten individuals to cast each ward simultaneously. But on his own, and only properly tuned to the first four elements, it was a much more arduous task. By the time he'd finished, Hugh remembered why he hated it so much. As he returned to Lady Aylesford's side, he bowed, acknowledging her position as superior Mage.

"It is done, my Lady. The grove is protected," Hugh said.

"Very good. You know your magic very well indeed. You have been taught well. Now, it is time for you to meet Mineral. You know the proper order of things?" Lady Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lady. I have been through enough elemental initiations to know what to do. I am ready when you are," Hugh said.

"Miss Matthews, draw a space around us. I will bring him so close to the earth he will not see daylight. Watch over us, and bring us back, if you must, though I am sure it will not be necessary to do so," Lady Aylesford said.

"Is Mineral that dangerous, my Lady?" Hugh asked.

"All elements are dangerous, my dear boy. They are not to be toyed with. Mineral lives deep underground, and we must descend to meet them. But do not look so afraid. I have done this many times before. I will bring you back to the daylight safely," Lady Aylesford said.

Miss Matthews drew a small circle around them as they sat down facing each other. Lady Aylesford took his hands, preparing to begin. Hugh could feel the tug of the deep earth as he sat there on the cool ground, and wondered how profound this would be.

"I am ready. Lead me into knowledge, master," Hugh said, offering the traditional request that always began an elemental initiation.

The ground felt like it was turning to mud, sinking down around them. Hugh was sure they weren't moving, but he could feel Mineral emerge from the deep earth to surround them. Mineral felt heavy and cold, as well as warm and bright; Hugh could see both hard, cold stone and molten rock. He shivered, not expecting the contrast. The air became heavy and thick, and Hugh had to force himself to breathe deeply to avoid being crushed by Mineral's considerable weight. 

"I am the herald, Persephone, of the Second Order, and I call upon the element of Mineral. I bring the novice Sirius into your presence to initiate him into your power. He comes bearing the blessings of Flame and Earth, Water and Air, and comes seeking knowledge. Accept him, Mineral, into your embrace," Lady Aylesford said.

Sirius. Hugh shivered, hearing his name of power. Not even Sir Roy knew what his name of power was, nor did he know what Sir Roy's was, and here was Lady Aylesford speaking his own name of power as if she had always known it. How could she have known it? Did Lord Aylesford tell her? Did she have access to the Book of Names at the Academy? Hugh didn't know, and it was not the right moment to ask. All he knew was that the act of speaking his name of power had reverberated through him, rendering him such that he would not question her. He knew her name of power, of course, and if he felt so keen, could use it against her, but he rather thought he wouldn't bother. 

Mineral felt much heavier than Earth. Earth had always been deep and cool, quiet, an element of few words. But Mineral was even more evasive even as it was present all around them. Hugh tried to find Mineral's voice, but could hear nothing. He could feel Lady Aylesford gently guiding him down towards the depths of the Earth, where Mineral resided. And yet, the element remained elusive.

As the air around them began to heat up, Hugh finally heard it. Mineral's voice was so low it was barely audible, and it felt more like vibrations, like a tremor in the ground. It wasn't immediately apparent that those tremors were words, but after a while, and with some visual cues, Hugh began to hear Mineral's words, insomuch as they were audible at all. 

_It takes courage for a stellar soul to make it this far underground. I thought you were too scared of being in the dark._

Hugh felt like he'd come to a dark cave, with a portal into the molten ground sitting before him. The air around him shivered with heat, and the ground was threatening to burn him. It felt like the words had come from the walls themselves, vibrations and visions seeping into his mind from the heat and the smell coming from the portal in the ground. Hugh suddenly felt like one of the Oracles at Delphi, breathing in the vapours from Hades to bring forth the words of the Gods. 

_You are no seer_ , Mineral grumbled. Hugh almost felt the element had just been laughing at him. _Why does the Dog Star come down so far to seek me?_

"I come to seek your knowledge, Mineral. Share with me your mysteries," Hugh said.

Mineral laughed, the earth trembling beneath him. Hugh heard some small pebbles crack and fall from the cave walls, as if he could set off the cave and have it fall in on him if he wasn't careful. He could sense Lady Aylesford's presence still, and she seemed to be easing Mineral's desire to crush him, just a little.

"I have no power over any element, least of all you, Mineral. Allow me to bring you into the world as I channel your magics. I am strong in heart and body, and I come with the support of the first four behind me. I have the patience of Earth, the adaptability of Water, the swiftness of Air, and the passion of flame. I have proved my worth to them, and I ask that you, er, accept me into your embrace," Hugh said, continuing the ritual with the traditional words, though he wasn't sure he hadn't just asked Mineral to crush him under a pile of rocks.

Mineral laughed. Hugh felt the air close in around him, as if the walls of the cave were slowly closing in. He was sure he would not be crushed, because that was never part of these rituals, but then again, the elemental powers were incredibly powerful. If Mineral wanted to crush him and reject him, so be it. 

_Lay your offering down_ , came Lady Aylesford's words into his mind. 

Hugh hadn't been aware he even had an offering with him until he saw the stones in his hand. There was a diamond, a ruby, a sapphire, and an emerald. They were small uncut stones, belonging to the earth, not the cut, prized jewels of human beings. Hugh carefully got to his feet and carefully walked to the portal. After a moment's thought, he threw the stones into the molten rock. They disappeared instantly, and Hugh backed off as the heat increased. 

"I come seeking your mysteries. I come seeking the mysteries of the elements. I wish to master myself, and know myself through the power of the Elements. Teach me, Mineral, so that I may become all that I may be," Hugh said, knowing it would be important to earn Mineral's trust if his work on his pebble magic was going to succeed.

 _Then come, Dog Star, into the pits of Tartarus, if that is what you really seek_ , Mineral growled.

The first mystery was revealed then, and Hugh had not quite been ready for it. He felt himself fall, and someone had grabbed him. In his chest, he felt Mineral tightening its grip, and then, finally the now-familiar jolt of acceptance. He did not find any peace until he had felt that jolt, knowing that Mineral had accepted him. 

Afterwards, Hugh wasn't entirely sure how the rite had ended. He was sure he'd said the right words, but all he really remembered was darkness, and being swept along in the water. His dreams, for he was sure he was asleep, or perhaps in a trance, were strange and diabolical. But water was always present. Water gently washed over him, and eventually, Hugh took a deep breath and opened his eyes, seeing that he was lying on the ground in the middle of the grove, with the two ladies sitting quietly beside him. Lady Aylesford offered him a drink, and as Hugh sat up, he drank the water he was offered, needing to rehydrate his body after being in the depths of the earth.

"Don't speak now. You have too much to think about. Stay within the grove while you recover, and once you are well enough, we will take you back inside the house," Lady Aylesford said.

Hugh just nodded mutely, not sure what else to do.

* * *

Sir Roy arrived back from the Academy to find Hugh sleeping on their bed. He looked peaceful enough until Sir Roy noticed the telltale mark on his left arm, eerily similar to the one Mineral had given him when he'd been initiated into that particular element. Sir Roy didn't need to ask what had happened; his own initiation into Mineral had rent him asunder, and it was, perhaps, only because of his alliance with Water that he had escaped unharmed. Mineral was a hard element to get to know.

Sir Roy undressed and lay down beside Hugh, knowing he'd probably appreciate his help once he woke. He wondered what he'd experienced. When Sir Richard had initiated him into Mineral a month ago at Lord Aylesford's request, Sir Roy had gone into the rite with Water enveloping him, promising him he would be alright. Mineral was particularly averse to Water, given its propensity to erode rocks away, and her presence made Sir Roy braver. 

Hugh wasn't so well tuned to Water, though. Hugh's element was Flame. an element Sir Roy was still not very good at using. In many ways, Hugh and Sir Roy made up for each other's weaknesses. Sir Roy could coax Water into obedience, and Hugh could tame even the harshest Flame with very little difficulty. 

As he thought about his past initiations, Sir Roy felt Water brush his consciousness. He smiled, pleased to have her around. He felt she might be needed once Hugh woke up. 

"Water, are our experiences with initiations really so different?" Sir Roy mused softly, not wanting to wake the man beside him. 

_Everyone is claimed by a different element. How strongly they feel its influence is immeasurable_ , Water replied.

Sir Roy glanced over at Hugh. "I may drown him if I am not careful. I can extinguish him like I can stop fire."

_Then you had better be careful with him._

Sir Roy didn't reply. He rolled his sleeve up to reveal the mark Mineral had left on his skin. It wasn't exactly a natural mark, nor was it a burn. It was a magical mark that could never be removed. It was only after his Mineral initiation that he recognised a similar mark on Lord Aylesford's left arm for what it really was. It was proof that Mineral had claimed him. 

Sir Roy's mark from Mineral was roughly the shape of a coiled serpent, though it was not much more than a serpent-shaped mark, rather than an illustration of one. It curled around like a letter S. Lord Aylesford's did not coil so much, but it was still serpentine. Electricity had left a similar mark upon his back, but he had not noticed it until Lord Aylesford had found the lightning scar at the base of his neck one evening. It was Sir Roy's first moment of realisation that the second four elements left physical marks on the Apprentices being initiated into them for the first time. He idly wondered what Animal and Vegetable would leave on him as proof of their allegiance.

Sir Roy sat up to get a better look at Hugh's mark. It coiled the opposite way, like a backwards S, only it was much more distorted, looking more like a fishing hook than a serpent. Again, he wondered what Hugh had seen when he'd gone to meet Mineral.

* * *

"How long have I been asleep?" Hugh murmured. It was the first question he could think of as he woke, opening his eyes to the ceiling of their room. 

Sir Roy turned to face him. "Three days. I have scarcely left my bed. Did Mineral hit you hard?"

Hugh merely nodded. He couldn't find the words to speak, not about that. "I have been to Tartarus," he said eventually.

Sir Roy nodded in acknowledgement, and showed him his mark, proving he knew what he meant. "He is a brutal element. Do you need more grounding? I can call upon Water if you need her healing powers."

Hugh took a deep breath. "I could do with her presence. I am just so hot."

Sitting up, Sir Roy knelt at his side as he brought forth Water. She greeted him warmly, knowing what needed to be done. Holding his hands over Hugh's body, Sir Roy channelled all the Water magic he could summon, trying to cool him off. 

It took fifteen minutes before Hugh finally smiled with relief. Sir Roy applied one more spell before finishing, hoping he'd be alright. He waited for Hugh to speak, if he wanted to do so. 

"You should've done the wards for Water. Maybe I'd have been alright," Hugh murmured.

"You'll be fine. Water will soothe you now. Drink in her calm, and listen to my voice if you need to. Maybe one day, we'll talk about what Mineral has shown us, but for now, just be still," Sir Roy said.

Hugh nodded, and lay there, feeling Water surround and soothe him. With Sir Roy by his side, he finally shed the last of Mineral's energies, and found himself ready to continue with his work.

* * *

It took a while to recover from their elemental initiations. The second four elements, Animal, Vegetable, Mineral, and Electricity, were always like that, with initiations much more trying and complex to deal with. They were only considered suitable for Apprentices to work with, as they were felt to have the necessary resilience to deal with the aftermath. Indeed, they were often seen as a test of who would finish their Apprenticeships, as those who failed to cope with them tended to drop out. Those who thrived and kept on going despite the deep mysteries they'd been shown were thought most likely to be wizzards, and this trend had generally been observed over the years. 

Hugh had found himself quite surprised by his resilience, though he felt he had needed it to survive his family for so long and not be rendered mad. Mineral had tested him quite thoroughly, but once he'd been properly grounded, and had spent time talking about his experience with Sir Roy in the bath house over the course of several long, languid nights, he was able to move on and continue working on his magic. He felt this a good achievement, as he needed Mineral's magics to make the spell work properly. Mineral was still a haunting presence, but agreeable to work with nonetheless. Perhaps it was just Mineral's nature to be rough and hard to get along with. 

The initiations had also delayed their work on their companions' ceremony, and with Lord Aylesford away in London, there was no time to organise anything much until he returned. Sir Roy had been left behind, tasked with developing a new song for his music magic. Sir Roy had taken to the task with great enthusiasm, and he had spent days locked away in his room, scribbling and playing, trying to make the magic work in a new composition. 

Hugh had his own work to attend to as well. Lord Aylesford expected him to continue trying to scale up the magic he'd created, and attempt to make other foods with it. One new food at the very least was his goal, and Hugh knew what he wanted to create, if only the magic would obey. Spiced buns were one thing, but he had always fancied the magic would be good for a soup or stew. To that end, he had very politely requested the assistance of Lord Aylesford's cook in coming up with a recipe to try, and had made sure she was amply compensated for her time. With her help, he had what he needed. All he had to do was try it out.

His reluctance stemmed from the fact he had still not been able to visit Brother St Mercy and learn from him as to what he ought to do. The monk was on a pilgrimage to France, and was not expected back for six months. Hugh would just have to make do with the books he had, and wait until later to talk to the monk. It was a shame, as there were a few things he really wanted to ask him about food magic that he thought would help him as he tried to scale up his spell. He would just have to experiment and follow his instincts as he tried to find the correct method, or at the very least, a method that worked.

* * *

Sir Roy went to find Hugh one evening to call him for supper. Not finding him in the workshop he usually worked in, he walked the grounds, trying to find him. In the end, he found him in the sacred grove, sitting quietly by the willow tree. Sir Roy could sense no wards in place, indicating that the grove had not been set up and was safe to enter, and went over to him, unafraid to enter the space.

"I was not expecting to find you here, Hugh. It is time for supper my friend, though you do not look overly concerned by that. What has brought you here?" Sir Roy said as he sat down beside him.

"I've been thinking about what we might do here. It is hard to think of what to do. Magic does not come with these kind of rituals; that is what the Church is for. And yet, does it not feel right to bond our relationship here rather than in a church?" Hugh said, leaning back against the trunk of the tree. 

"I have already come to that conclusion, yes. This is where we belong, not in church. I suppose we need to work out what it is we want to do. I am not well versed at ritual, but I do enjoy the act of performing sacred ritual together. We have not done as much of that as what I have done with Lord Aylesford. I did not know if you were so keen as I to do such a thing, sacrilegious as it may appear to other people," Sir Roy said.

"Yes, but you use religious rituals. Magical rituals are not the same, not at all. I know we have some rituals, because we do ritual initiations all the time. But I am not sure if we have anything else. Working with the Elements instead of with God makes it hard," Hugh said.

"Ahh, but God is indistinguishable from magic. I see no difference in worshipping out here with the Elements as I do invoking God in a church," Sir Roy said. 

"Alright, then. How would you do it, then? How could we mark our relationship using magic and the grove?" Hugh said, laying down the challenge. 

Sir Roy thought a moment. "Well, I think we ought to prepare as we do for initiations. Well, prepare for initiations we know are coming, like our final ones before our Apprenticeship. After all, this will be like an initiation, just not about tuning us to the Elements. We will be tuning to each other."

Hugh considered his words. "So we fast half a day, and cleanse ourselves in the first four Elements?"

Sir Roy nodded. "We fast, and purify in Water, Air, Flame, and Earth, the way we are used to doing. If this is going to be a ritual based on our magical training, then we ought to do it properly. The ceremony I performed with Lord Aylesford involved a six hour fast, but with the Elemental cleansings, I think three hours is probably enough, unless you want it to take all day from dawn until midnight."

Hugh shook his head. "No, half a day is fine. Who would do the cleansings, then? They are normally done by our teachers."

"The ladies ought to do them. They are skilled magical practitioners, after all. They ought to be able to do them for us. If they have indeed undergone the same magical training as us, they ought to be familiar with what we are talking about. It would be good to include them in the rite, anyway, as they are part of this household. They were part of my ceremony, and they should be part of ours," Sir Roy said.

"Cleansed by the ladies? Why would they be a part of our ritual?" Hugh asked, confused. 

"We are a household of five, Hugh. There is you, and me, and my Lord, and my Lady, and her companion. If you are not willing to be bonded so with the ladies, then we ought not to have any ceremony to bond us," Sir Roy said. "I did not think you were so against women casting magic."

"I am not against it, I was just querying their involvement. I have seen little of them while I have been here, but I do not think that is anything against them. I have been busy with my work," Hugh said. "That said, Lady Aylesford initiated me into Mineral, after all. I can vouch for her skills. What else ought we include in our ritual, then?"

"We should cleanse ourselves, and then parade to the grove, just like we did for our initiations at the Academy. We cast the wards, and set up the grove, asking the Elements to watch over us. I feel Lord Aylesford ought to preside over the ritual blessing itself. The ladies may assist him."

Hugh felt that sounded acceptable. "And what of the contents of this ritual? Are we just going to call on the Elements to bless us, one by one, and leave it at that? What happens when it's over? Do we go back to your room to consummate our bond? Do we feast? Do we pray in the chapel?" 

"I am not sure of the ritual content, but I will write a note to my Lord and ask for his advice. He will be able to give us some ideas. As for what happens afterwards, well, what would you prefer? I should like it to be something special, but whether it is time alone to pray, or to go to bed together, or some other thing, I am not sure. I feel we ought to do something in the grove, to mark our love here. But I do not know what," Sir Roy said.

Hugh smirked as he glanced at his friend. "Are you implying you might want to make love in the grove, Sir Roy? I did not know you were so filthy."

Sir Roy blushed a little. "Well, not in so many words. I was thinking more like a kiss, like at a wedding. But it may not be magically powerful enough. We need a way to seal our love within the grove, a magical act that finishes the rite." 

"You do want to have sex in the grove, don't you, Sir Roy? Do not hide from me. I can tell it is what you would love to do, to lie with me here amongst the trees and feel our naked skin brushing against each other, and the grass beneath us. It seems an entirely appropriate way to consummate our relationship, but if you are too prudish to do such a thing, we could save such an act for our bed, and perhaps do something more civilised instead," Hugh said.

Sir Roy discretely turned away from him, hiding his swelling member. "I am not sure. I think we ought to talk to Lord Aylesford about this. He will be able to tell us what to do. Now, I think we had better return to the house for supper."

Hugh moved close to him, their faces inches apart. "You would parade your arousal through the house, my friend?" 

"We are not having sex in the sacred grove!" Sir Roy hissed. 

"And yet you will pray to God as you fuck your Lord and Master. Why is magic so protected?" Hugh challenged. 

"It is not, it is just- oh." 

Sir Roy found his voice failed him at that moment. Hugh was closer still, and Sir Roy could feel his palm pressing against his groin. It did not help. He felt too exposed. Someone might see them, in spite of the wall surrounding them. But Hugh would not be discouraged, and the more Sir Roy let him touch him, the more he was willing to surrender to him. 

Sir Roy found himself positioned against the trunk as Hugh got to work removing his trousers. Sir Roy was glad to free his prick, hard and eager as it was, and the cool twilight air made him even more aroused. Hugh took little time to slick him up, and Sir Roy could only gasp as Hugh lowered himself down onto his prick; there was no going back now. 

It was a wild, furious, and fast act of lovemaking. Hugh was facing away from him, and in a bid to get a better position, pushed Hugh onto his front, and lay on top of him, hiding in the shadows as he thrust hard into him. It was in the middle of this that Sir Roy stopped, suddenly inspired. He propped himself up on his hands and then reached around underneath Hugh.

"What are you doing, Roy?" Hugh said, trying to work out why Sir Roy seemed to be digging a hole underneath him. 

"I know how we can finish the rite. We make love like this, where I enter you, and you enter the Earth. We share our love with each other, and with the natural world. Does that make sense to you?" Sir Roy breathed, trying to make a small round pit that would catch Hugh's seed.

"Oh, of course. Why didn't I think of that? I even read that daft chapter about archaic uses of bodily fluids in magic casting a few month ago. Why do I get to offer my seed to the Earth and you don't, though? I mean, your seed would be just as acceptable as mine," Hugh said.

"Of course. I was merely suggesting it as an idea. I was not implying that you should be the one making love to the Earth," Sir Roy said.

"Can we talk about this later, though? I was nearly there, my friend," Hugh said.

"Of course. We can discuss this further with Lord Aylesford when he returns. For now, at least, we should see if this sort of lovemaking is going to cause us harm, don't you agree?" Sir Roy said.

Hugh spent a moment adjusting the earth around him, making himself a soft mound to work with. It seemed an odd thing to do, but as he did it, and as his hard prick touched the earth that was, technically, still inside the grove, he felt Earth reaching up to greet him, and the sensation through his body was like a flood. She moved close to him and surrounded him, bringing him close as she prepared to take his seed. 

"Come on, Roy, Earth is waiting, and I am in need of your help," Hugh urged as Sir Roy shifted and repositioned himself.

Reminded of his task, Sir Roy made sure Hugh was ready and in place, and slowly entered him again. He could feel Earth's magic flowing through him and into himself, and he knew, then, that his instincts had been right. This was the magical way to finish their rite. Lying close to Hugh, he began thrusting again, keen to finish what he started. With one last effort, their seed was spilled, and Sir Roy and Hugh could both feel Earth thanking them.

"Yes, my friend, that is how we close this rite," Hugh murmured.

Sir Roy agreed. They lay together a moment, catching their breath, before they got up and dressed, cleaning themselves up with a quick wash in the pool nearby. They spent a moment making sure the site of their lovemaking was not visible before they headed back to the house, content, for the moment, that they had made significant progress on their ritual. It was not completely set in stone, but given time, and some discussion with Lord Aylesford, it would all come together, and it would be a fitting way for Hugh and Sir Roy to show their love and mark how important they were to each other.


	6. Chapter 6

"I should like to talk to you, my Lord, if I may," Hugh ventured one late afternoon. 

It had been a week since Sir Roy and Hugh had discussed their magical ritual in the grove. Hugh had not had a chance to talk to Lord Aylesford about it yet, as he had been in London. The Earl had returned from London earlier in the day, and Hugh had been putting off asking to talk to him too soon lest he seem too eager. He should not wish to deprive the Earl of a rest, having come from so far away. But Lord Aylesford was happy to spare him the time.

"You may talk to me all you wish. What do you wish to discuss?" Lord Aylesford asked, trying to gauge the nature and potential place where they may need to speak.

"It is ... a little personal, my Lord. May we go somewhere private?" Hugh asked.

"Certainly. I assume you have a place in mind?" Lord Aylesford said.

"The baths, my Lord, if you would oblige. I know we will not be overheard there," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford allowed a small smile to cross his lips. "Of course, that is how the magic is intended to work. I take it the matter is quite serious then, if that is where we must talk."

"It is a matter of a rather delicate nature and I would feel more at ease there in the baths. I do not feel so unequal to you there," Hugh said, hiding how awkward it was to say that to the Earl.

"Well, let us retire there for the moment. There is time before supper. I should appreciate a bath. My body aches so from the journey home," Lord Aylesford said.

"That is also why I suggested it, my Lord. You must be very tired. I will not keep you long," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford brought an arm around his shoulder as he led him away. "Time spent with you is never wasted, my friend. Come, let us go rest our weary bones."

* * *

Hugh felt it was nice to be with Lord Aylesford again. He had grown to quite like the man, and knowing they shared more in common than he had originally thought made it easier. Their friendship had grown quite well, but while Hugh felt quite at home at Packington, there were moments where he still felt as if he were not quite a part of the household yet. He did not think it would last, but it did make him feel inadequate. The Earl had been most generous in his hospitality to Hugh, and Hugh did not wish to sound ungrateful. He just hoped he could bring this up with Lord Aylesford without offending him. 

The warm waters of the tepidarium were chosen. Lord Aylesford spent little time in slipping in, allowing himself to relax in the water. Hugh was more comfortable in the baths now that he did not mind being in such a situation with the Earl, and sat nearby at a respectable distance. For a while, they just lay there in the water, letting it wash over them and relax them. The bath house was filled with pagan treasures, and Hugh gazed at them absently, unsure how to feel about them. He had not spent enough time in there to not notice them anymore. The large statue of Mars in particular still made him feel uneasy.

"So, what is it you wished to talk to me about, my friend? Is everything going well with your studies? Is there anything I can assist you with?" Lord Aylesford said, breaking the silence.

"Oh, no, my experiments are coming along well enough. That is not the problem. My Lord, I should hate to bring this up, but it is my place here, my Lord. I do not wish to sound ungrateful, and you and your Lady have made me feel welcome and loved, but still, I feel I do not belong here. I do not know where I fit, or what role I ought to play. Sir Roy is your companion, and your ladies have their place, but what am I but your Apprentice? I do not feel like I belong in the household," Hugh said, hoping he had been clear enough.

"Ahh, I was hoping this would no longer be an issue for you, but clearly there is still room to make you feel at home here. I thank you for bringing it to my attention. I have never wanted you to feel inferior, or excluded, and if that is how you are still feeling, then we ought to act to change that. What is it you really desire from me? What do you want our relationship to be?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh thought a moment. "Well, my Lord, I have thought about this very much, and all I can really identify is the fact that while I wear Sir Roy's ring, he also wears yours. I feel like I am not important to you. That darkness has been getting to me again, my Lord, but I am trying to fight it away. I do not like what it does to me."

"Again, my friend, what sort of relationship do you want from me? I cannot help you unless you tell me what you want from me. Is a mentorship not enough? Do you desire love from me? Do you wish for intimacy? Or do you require something else?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh sighed. "That is just it, my Lord. I do not know. Perhaps Sir Roy does not mind how much older you are, but I do. You have been more of a father to me than a lover, someone who will love me and encourage me, like no one in my family has ever done for me before. But I am not your son, and I would not presume to think you would be willing to treat me in such a way. And while I appreciate and enjoy the intimacy we have shared, I would rather only have Sir Roy, if you will not be offended, my Lord. I love him in ways I do not love you."

"Friendship, then, is that what you need? Friendship from one who can be your guiding hand? I did notice how lacking you were of that sort of affection when we first met. I am willing to continue in that role with you, if that is what you would prefer. I would not wish to make you uncomfortable," Lord Aylesford said.

"My Lord, that is part of it, but I just feel like I do not have a proper place within the household. I could do my work from the Academy, and it would change nothing here. That is what I am trying to say, my Lord," Hugh said.

"You are jealous of Sir Roy's position, I think. You worry that he has duties to me that will surpass your own, and that you will be left behind. Perhaps, for the time being, you ought to be my second companion. Then you will be able to come with us to London, and I daresay you could do with the retainer, given the way your father feels about your inheritance. I ask for nothing but your companionship in return. Would that make you happy, then?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Would it make me happy, my Lord? I am not sure. I would appreciate the income, I will not lie to you about that. But I do not wish to take such a position just for the money. I would not feel right about that, given all you have done for me," Hugh said

"I never said you had to take the position for the money. It is only a benefit of the position, after all. Companionship is the main reward," Lord Aylesford said.

"Would I have to undergo the companions' ceremony as Sir Roy did?" Hugh asked.

"If it is your desire, certainly. It is not necessary, but it does formally mark your position, if that is something that you would like. I would be happy to undergo the rites with you," Lord Aylesford said.

"I know it must seem strange that I am asking this of you, but I do worry about my future, and I worry about my place here. I worry about many things, my Lord. I know I will never be your equal, my Lord, nor Sir Roy's, but do not shun me, my Lord. Do not leave me out in the cold. I have tasted sweet love, my Lord, and I do not wish to live without it," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford was surprised by the emotion in his voice. He had not quite expected Hugh would be so affected by the short time they had spent together. "What is it that you really desire, Hugh? Why is it you are chasing this intimacy? What is it you hope to achieve?"

Hugh thought a moment, and as he thought of his previous words, it all became clear to him what he was chasing. "Love, my Lord, is all I desire. Love from Sir Roy, and from you, like the father I ought to have had. No one else has accepted me, my Lord. You and Sir Roy are all I have. I am poor and not much of a student, but I try, my Lord. All I want is love."

Lord Aylesford brought him close and pressed a kiss to his head. "Yes, it is sad to see what Mage Jeremiah has become. He was once one of the greatest wizzards of his generation. You have inherited his talent, there's no doubt about that. I am sad that he has neglected you. But he never did have much time for people, not even his own family, it seems."

"I am only thankful I was able to spent as little time with him as possible. I would not want that manor anyway, not when it is so full of horrible memories. I would rather destroy it and start again. But I am not sure I will get my chance, not if he disinherits me as he keeps threatening to do every time he sees me. I am not sure it is just a pretense, my Lord. I fear he really will leave me with nothing, and that frightens me so much, my Lord. I have nothing in the whole world, no one but you and Sir Roy. I am not sure what I would do if I was left with nothing. Where would I go? How would I even support myself? I may run away and become a monk if I cannot find any way to survive. If they will not have me, then I may just have to die. What kind of life would be worth living if even God's holy men did not want me?" Hugh sighed, and tried to shift the dark thoughts from his mind. "I am sorry, my Lord. The melancholy is particularly bad tonight. I have shamed you with such thoughts, I am sure."

"Do not apologise, Hugh. You are hardly the only man to have thought such things. You are lucky, Hugh. Once you are a degreed wizzard, you can teach at the Academy. It may not be much of a job at first, but Lord Albion assures me you would be welcome there if you ever needed the work. He believes you will settle down once you mature, as do I. You are still so young and green, and have not had time to let your skin harden and give you strength and wisdom. It will come in time, though, do not fear. With age comes wisdom, as the sapling becomes the mighty oak. Believe in yourself. You are not alone in this world," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh shifted against him, surprised by his words. "My Lord, I did not think Lord Albion thought much of me. I feel I have turned my teachers against me."

"I can reassure you that this is not the case. You have been reckless, and have behaved deplorably in the past, but you have been given a chance to leave that all behind. I know you are hesitant and anxious, but trust me. I am in a position to protect you, and bring great benefits to your life. Come to London with me next time I go. I will take you to parties with Sir Roy, and you will have a chance to improve your position. Indeed, if your pebble magic is to be of any benefit to the military, you will need me to convince the right people to accept it. I am the Lord Lieutenant of the county, remember. I am in charge of the yeomanry. My influence with the King could ensure the spread of your pebble magic through every yeomanry regiment, as well as to the Household Cavalry. Have you not thought about these things? If you care so passionately about your magic as you say you do, it would be a shame if you did not capitalise on its potential," Lord Aylesford said.

"My Lord, I can barely imagine what I will do should I finish my Apprenticeship, let alone what I will do if my pebble magic proves successful. I have felt too alone and isolated to feel like I could achieve much with it beyond my own satisfaction," Hugh said.

"We should be allies, my friend. I am already supporting you while you are living here, and I will support you as long as you need me to. I hold some sway with the King. Do not underestimate how precious that could be to you if you wish to improve yourself. I am more than happy to recommend your pebble magic, should you prove it can scale up. He would incorporate it into the military if I persuaded him of its potential. I could see you paid handsomely for the privilege. Magic can be sold like that. It would support you for many years, perhaps allow you to buy land for yourself. Who knows? Prove yourself worthy, and His Majesty may give you your own honour. I think it is time you stopped thinking about your idle dreams, and begin working on practical uses for this magic. I know you created it so you could feed the poor, and I do admire you for that. I personally would use your magic for such a purpose in London for my own work, and if the King is feeling charitable, he may feel the same way. He gave us perpetual fire. You could give us perpetual food," Lord Aylesford said.

"I wonder whether the King would accept the magic of a Catholic. I wonder whether he would care at all," Hugh countered. "He has no reason to accept anything I say. I doubt even you could persuade him to give me an audience."

"I am fairly certain I could do just that. Do not tempt me, Hugh, or I will write to him this evening, and arrange it," Lord Aylesford said, offering a teasing smile. "I am very close to His Majesty, Hugh. If I suggest he ought to meet someone, he usually agrees. My advice is often sought on many matters at hand. It is no trivial thing I am offering. Please, remember that."

Hugh sighed and shook his head. "But, my Lord, you do not understand. I am Catholic. I am not welcome at Court, even if I were a Lord myself. I know the rules. I need to know the rules, so I am not found somewhere I am not meant to be. Do not pretend that I am the same as you. My faith marks me as the enemy."

"It is true that Catholics are not allowed to hold some offices of State, and His Majesty can be quite stubborn as to whether he will allow converted candidates to take office. Our Lord Chancellor is an ex-Catholic, for example. He is a thoroughly decent man, good and honest. I am not aware of any prohibition on Catholics at Court, however. Given how old some families are, and how religious tensions and primacy have changed over the centuries, it would be impossible to ban Catholics from Court. He'd have to bar half the Lords from attending, and I know he quite likes many of them. No, Court is not Parliament. The rules are not the same. His Majesty would give you an audience, and you would be welcome at Court. This is the King who gave us all perpetual fire. Did he not give it to Anglicans and Catholics, rich and poor? Even you got a lick of flame, I imagine, or your parents did, at any rate," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh thought a moment as the memory returned to him. "I did get one, that is true. I had quite forgotten about that. I was only a small boy at the time. I am not sure I really recognised the man in all his finery who had come to the Academy to give us all small lanterns of fire that never went out. I still have it now. It sits on my desk at the Academy. I always feel like it is the Holy Spirit watching over us. I had quite forgotten His Majesty gave it to me."

"See? His Majesty gave you perpetual fire. He gave a flame to every person living in the Kingdom, and I mean every single person. No one missed out. Certainly, some in the Lords, and some of his advisors wanted him to discriminate, but His Majesty would not give in. Everyone would get a lick of flame. It was his gift to his people to celebrate his coronation. He brought fire, and warmth, to the people, and he will always be remembered for that. Has not life improved because of this? Have the poor not survived and bettered their existence because they always have a flame with them for heat and cooking? Fewer of them are dying over the cold winters. If you have not seen these benefits, then you are not looking hard enough," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh had to agree. He had seen these things. Many in his congregation were poor, but they all brought their flames to church every week, thanking God for giving them His fire. Some even asked for God to bless the King, which Hugh still found distinctly odd for Catholics living under a Protestant King. But perhaps perpetual fire had changed their lives so much that it washed away their bitter divisions.

"I wish he would let us worship openly, then. I would be more inclined to bow to His Majesty if we were allowed to have a church of our own without fear of it being burnt down and looted," Hugh said after a moment's thought.

"Yes, I am sorry to say we are still working to change that. I am still trying to rally enough support in the Lords to bring in changes. It is a highly divisive issue, particularly with the American colonies being so restless. No one is particularly interested in being seen to be sympathetic to Dissenters and rebels. I fear they will try to break away from us if they are not placated. They are not above war to secure their independence from the King, particularly if France were to ally with them against us," Lord Aylesford said.

"All I want is to live in peace. I do not want to fear I will be charged with treason if I am arrested, simply for being Catholic. I thank you for trying, my Lord, even if you have not achieved much. It is comforting to know someone understands, at least, and is trying to change things," Hugh said.

"It is all I can do. If I should not use my position to better the lives of others below me, then I am not living as Christ intended," Lord Aylesford said. "Was there anything else you wanted to discuss while we are here?"

"No, my Lord, I don't think so," Hugh said. 

"Then, let us finish up here, and then return to the house for supper," Lord Aylesford said.

* * *

"I have been speaking to Lord Aylesford this evening," Hugh said as he and Sir Roy climbed into bed together later that night.

Sir Roy looked over at him curiously. "Oh? And what have you been discussing with him such that you feel a need to tell me about it?" 

"We have been discussing companions, and my role in the household. It is not that I do not feel loved, but I am only an Apprentice, after all. I could live at the Academy, and it would change nothing. But he has offered to take me on as a second companion so I have the same place as you. We would be equals then," Hugh said.

Sir Roy sighed. "I do not know why you care so much about titles, but if that is what you need, then I will not stop you. Does this mean we are to postpone our own ritual?"

Hugh lay back. "I am not sure. Lord Aylesford has offered me a companions' ceremony, but I am not sure if I will accept it. You have been through it, Roy. Do you think I ought to do it too?"

Sir Roy shrugged. "It is akin to elemental initiations in terms of how it affected me. If that is what you wish to chase, by all means, go through with it. It brought me closer to Lord Aylesford in ways I cannot explain. You will only understand once you have been through it. Is it necessary to become a companion? Perhaps not. But I think you would feel inferior if you did not undergo it. Then we would be equals, like you wish us to be."

Hugh looked over at him. "Are there mysteries, Roy? Why would such a ceremony require mysteries?" 

"You will only understand that once you go through it. I heard the song of the elements, the voice of God. It changes you completely. Do not go through with it if you do not think you can cope," Sir Roy offered by way of advice.

Hugh lay down and stared up at the ceiling. He was silent for a moment before he spoke. "I think I ought to undergo these rites with Lord Aylesford. Then I will do the rites with you. I would feel better approaching you as a proper equal. I know that doesn't matter to you, but it does to me. You are a Baronet, whether you ever wished to be or not. You have land and title to your name. As for me, I have no title to my name, no land, no money, nothing. At least as a Lord's companion like you, we would be equals. I would feel better about that then."

"Very well, if that is what you need. I will not stand in the way," Sir Roy said. "Just - promise me you will not rush into these rites. Spend the next month or so with Lord Aylesford, learning about the role and what you will be required to do. Once you are ready, and my Lord believes you are ready, then you should do the rites. Just trust me on this matter, please. Becoming a Lord's companion is not just about the retainer, though it is appreciated. There are duties you will need to perform, just like I do. Our job is to provide companionship, so we go where Lord Aylesford goes. We tend to his personal care, if there is no valet to tend to him. We will escort and protect the ladies, should they require it. You will need to learn how to continue your Apprenticeship work around your duties if you wish to pass your final exams. Are you willing to take on such responsibilities?" 

"If you had asked me a few months ago, perhaps not. But I am not who I was back then. No one will provide for me, so until I am a degreed wizzard, I am nothing. I will be a Mage, then, and while I will not have land and buildings, I will have a title, and that will be enough for me, for now. I can support myself once I am a Mage. If I need to allow Lord Aylesford to guide and support me while I work towards that goal, then so be it. Being his companion in return seems the least I can do for him, given all the trust he has placed in me," Hugh said.

Sir Roy looked over at him, and saw a fiery determination in his eyes. He had not seen his old friend so fired up for a very long time. Perhaps Hugh really would be able to do everything he needed to do. It was true that once Hugh was a Mage, he could support himself independently. There were always families seeking to employ wizzards, families willing to pay handsomely for their services. If a wizzard was lucky, he may find himself a patron willing to support him while he studied for a higher degree in return for personal magical services. If Hugh was diligent in his work, and found a good employer, he could acquire his own property. Mages ranked higher than gentry, anyway, so if Hugh acquired his first degree and Sir Roy did not, Hugh would outrank him. Sir Roy smiled at that thought. He would be glad to see Hugh settled and able to support himself. 

"You have all my support, Hugh. I will always stand by you, no matter what," Sir Roy said.

Hugh brought him into a soft kiss as a thank you. Neither spoke as they settled down in each other's arms. With a soft clap, the lamps were extinguished, leaving the room in darkness, and they settled down to sleep, content.

* * *

Hugh was surprised to find Lord Aylesford waiting for him the next morning. It was early, and Sir Roy was not yet awake. Hugh wasn't sure why he had been woken, but Lord Aylesford gestured silently for him to follow, and Hugh did so, quietly slipping out of bed as he followed Lord Aylesford out of the room.

"Dress in your riding gear, my friend. We will go for a ride before breakfast. It does invigorate my soul, and I should like to spend a little time with you before we eat," Lord Aylesford said. "Be quick. You can dress in here, if you wish to avoid waking Roy."

"Oh, yes, sir, of course," Hugh said, trying not to yawn. He quickly went back to his room to retrieve his riding gear. and left Sir Roy sleeping in bed, hoping he hadn't woken him. 

Once they were both dressed, Lord Aylesford led him down to the stables. Hugh owned a dark grey gelding that he'd bought off Lord Capill, which he had named Pluto. He was a temperamental horse, but not aggressive, and occasionally did things his way, rather than what Hugh had asked him to do. Hugh suspected he was not the most intelligent horse in the world, but he was generally a decent riding horse, if not much good for anything else. 

Pluto was pleased to see Hugh that morning. It had been some time since he'd been riding, and he'd appreciate being with him again. Even though he hadn't had the horse for more than five years, he was still a good horse, and a good companion. Hugh liked knowing he could go anywhere he liked, as long as he had Pluto with him. 

Together with Lord Aylesford's mount Athena, Hugh set off for a ride around Packington. It was the first time he'd really appreciated just how large the estate really was. They kept to the roads, riding past the farms and other buildings, before Lord Aylesford steered them into a path that cut through some thick woods. 

"Gallop to the clearing, Hugh. I'll race you!" Lord Aylesford called. "Just follow the path!" 

Lord Aylesford already had Athena speeding up before Hugh had really taken in what he'd said, but he soon caught up, following the light horse as they galloped the short trail to the clearing. It came upon Hugh quite suddenly that even Pluto was surprised it was there. He came to a sudden stop, and Hugh had to rein him in to stop him bolting. 

"Calm down, boy, it's just a clearing. Anyone'd think you'd never seen one before," Hugh said, getting the horse to walk around, trying to settle him.

"That horse of yours suits you, my friend. Where did you find such a beast?" Lord Aylesford asked as he led Athena over to the pool in the middle of the clearing to drink. 

"I bought him off Lord Capill, my Lord. I am still not sure I paid too much for him, but I am rather fond of him now. I doubt anyone else could ride him. I know how he is now. I know all his tricks," Hugh said. 

"How on earth did you pay for a horse like that? I thought you had no money," Lord Aylesford said. "That horse is from good breeding stock. It would not have been cheap."

Hugh shrugged as he dismounted, leading the horse over to the pool to drink. "I used my father's money. My old horse went lame, and I needed some way to get to the Academy. I told him I'd just steal one of his if he didn't pay for Pluto. He was cheap, though, because of his temperament, or so I was told. I don't mind him, though. He won't let anyone else ride him but me. Trust me, my Lord, don't try it. He'll kick you for sure, like he's kicked other people."

"I am not going anywhere near that horse, that's for sure. Here, tie him up over there, by that tree, once he's had a drink. Keep him away from my mare if you know what's good for you, then we'll talk," Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord," Hugh said.

Hugh stroked the horse's neck as he drank, reassuring him things would be alright. Pluto did startle at the strangest things, Hugh thought, but he'd always kept him safe. Even when he didn't do what Hugh'd told him to do, he'd always made sure he made it home in one piece. Hugh made very sure the knot was tight as he hitched him to a tree nearby. He thought about letting him graze, but even he wasn't sure he trusted him around a mare, not when he was not there to lead him away if he got too frisky. Pluto might be a gelding, but he was not always aware of this fact. Nevertheless, Hugh did ensure he had enough rein to graze on the sweet grass around him, while ensuring he was not able to wander.

He found Lord Aylesford sitting by the water, offering him a flask. Hugh joined him, and was surprised to find the flask full of hot tea. It was what he needed after the ride, he felt, when he had not had breakfast yet. 

"So, I assume there is some purpose to bringing me out here so early?" Hugh said.

"Indeed. There are, of course, certain protocols that must be followed before I can take you on as a companion. You are not a stranger as Sir Roy was, so I do not feel I need to spend two months getting to know you, but I will need to educate you on the role you seek, and of course, I must get Lady Aylesford's permission to take you on in that role. Becoming a Lord's companion, in this household at least, is not as simple as moving into the companion's room. Because of the close nature of the relationship, I like to be sure I am asking the right person, and I will not bring anyone into the household that my Lady does not approve of. You may be called upon to escort my ladies, as you may be aware, so you must be trustworthy and loyal, and someone I can rely on to take care of my ladies and not violate them or lead them into danger. I know you are not that kind of man, but I still must be sure," Lord Aylesford said. 

"Of course, I understand, my Lord. Given my recent behaviour in the Watch, I should think it wise to take precautions with me. I have not made a good name for myself, and I would not be surprised if Lady Aylesford turned me down," Hugh said.

"Oh, I do not think you are doomed, but you will have to win their trust. I trust you, because I have seen how you have grown and matured, but as we naturally spend less time with the ladies, I cannot be so sure they will accept you. Please do not take this as a personal insult. I do not wish to offend you by my words, but I must be cautious, and you must be willing to rise to your new-found responsibilities. I will take you to London in a few weeks with Sir Roy, and the ladies, to attend a ball. We will see how well you cope as a companion in that context. If there is promise, we will proceed," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh almost went to reply, but the Earl's words had hit him hard. He hadn't expected there would be a chance he could be rejected as a companion. Perhaps he had been too keen to have Sir Roy's position. "I feel like you are trying to discourage me, my Lord. Why would you not be so eager to allow me this role, when you so readily took me on as an Apprentice? I do not understand why you hesitate."

"Being my Apprentice is not the same as being my companion. Allowing you to become my companion would require much more intimacy and trust than just being my Apprentice. When you become my companion, and wear my ring, you are as good as a member of my household, and that requires certain expectations and responsibilities. I am not being harsh with you; I do not offer my companionship to anyone who asks for it. If I did so, I would have so many companions I should need another manor to house them all. I need to be sure that this is the best thing for you, and for myself, and for the rest of the household. Your wellbeing is most important to me, and I will not jeopardise that by giving you more than you can handle. I will admit that part of my hesitation is in not knowing how you will cope with both your Apprentice and companion's responsibilities at once. You cannot shirk on either of them if you are given them both. I thought you were more concerned about your Apprenticeship, anyway. Working towards that title seemed to be more important, as the sooner you have that, the easier it will be to provide for yourself. Or have I remembered that wrong from our meeting a week ago?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh lowered his head. "I did say that, my Lord, yes. Becoming a Mage is where my future lies. I am doomed without it. But I still wish I did not feel so apart from you and Sir Roy. You do things together that do not involve me, and I feel like I am not wanted. If there is no way you will take me on as a companion, then I request permission to move back to the Academy, where I will be able to work on my projects without feeling like I am getting in the way, my Lord."

Lord Aylesford brushed him off. "There will be no need for that. I am not trying to talk you out of becoming my companion. I am merely trying to make it clear to you what would be expected of you if you took on this other role. You will not have all the time you have now to work on your pebble magic, and if you are in any way falling behind on that, I would rather have you work on your magic before I would be willing to give you extra responsibilities. When I took you on, I said I'd see you become a Mage, like you were always meant to be, and I will not stand back on that assertion. I will see you become a Mage, and I will watch you make a life of your own. But since you are so keen to be my companion, prove to me you can graduate by the summer, as well as tend to me and the extra responsibilities you will carry. How close are you to scaling up your magic?"

Hugh took a deep breath, trying to stall, just a little. "Not as close as I thought I would be. I have needed to see that monk I spoke to you about some time ago, but apparently he is on a pilgrimage and will probably not return in time for me to complete my work by the summer. I have been reading every available text on the matter of food magic, and trying every combination of magic I can think of, but have had little success. I am not sure it will be ready by the summer, unless I happen upon the right combination next week. Once I know I can scale it up, then I will try perfecting other recipes. But if it is all looking too hopeless, perhaps I ought to take on another project instead. If it means I will be a Mage by the summer, I will work on something else, and leave the pebble magic for later."

"Are you really having that much difficulty scaling it up? What is causing the delay, apart from not being able to see the monk?" Lord Aylesford asked.

"It is not being able to see the monk, my Lord. He is the only one who has ever cast this kind of magic before; everyone else who writes about it has only theory and ideas. I cannot work with those. I need to talk to someone who has cast this magic before to find out where I am going wrong, but I am afraid that will not happen in time. I really want to complete this magic in time, my Lord, but I am not sure, at this stage, that it will be possible," Hugh said.

"You say he is on a pilgrimage? When did he say he would be back?" Lord Aylesford said.

"I believe it may have been March, my Lord. Far, far too late for me," Hugh said, trying not to feel too saddened by the fact he would not be able to complete the magic in time.

"What other project would you work on if you decided to switch? Have you something else in mind that would, perhaps, be easier?" Lord Aylesford said.

"I came up with a theoretical way to cast protective wards in a more efficient manner, but I have never tried it, so I do not know if it would work as well. It was meant to speed up the time it might take to cast wards while on patrol with the Watch, so their time was not overly wasted casting magic. I also wanted it to be simple enough for anyone to cast, if given some simple training, so the Watch did not need to rely on recruiting wizzards from the Academy all the time. I did not waste all my time in the Watch while I was there, my Lord," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford was impressed. "Write me an essay on this magic, then, and I will check your theory. If I believe it can be done, and it can be finished in time, I will allow you to switch. I would be willing to fund the further development of your pebble magic once you have graduated, if you are not able to complete it for your Apprenticeship, because we have great need of it. Much as I love your pebble magic, I am more interested in your graduation. I do not think you will feel so inferior once you have that title and good employment."

Hugh nodded. "I hope so, my Lord. I will prepare an essay for you this week, then, if that is acceptable, and hopefully, one or the other will prove good enough for my Apprenticeship."

"I would appreciate that, Hugh. You will finish your Apprenticeship one way or another, don't worry about that. Now, come, let's ride a little more before we go back to the house. I do love being out here so early. I find it so refreshing," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh bowed his head. "Yes, my Lord. As you wish."


	7. Chapter 7

Sir Roy was surprised to find the bed empty when he woke, but he did not overly worry about it. Hugh had been off very early the past week to work on his magic, and that was where Sir Roy assumed he was. It was only when he went into Lord Aylesford's room, only to find it empty, that he assumed Hugh was with the Earl instead, and that whatever they were doing was not meant for Sir Roy to know about. He assumed they would be back in time for breakfast. 

He did not have to wait long to find them, however. As he was emerging from the bathing room hidden in Lord Aylesford's room, he found them both returning in their riding gear. Sir Roy felt he might get asked on morning rides too if he was ever prone to being awake at that hour. He had never quite understood Lord Aylesford's passion for being awake so early, but he never argued about it. Indeed, he had had enough trouble filling the bath, but Flame had finally agreed to work with him, and for the first time in his life, the hot water had flowed freely into the bath. Sir Roy's only regret was that Lord Aylesford had not been there to see it happen. 

"You have been out early, I see, my Lord," Sir Roy commented as he saw them waiting for him.

"One day, Sir Roy, I will coax you out for a morning ride. You must not be so stubborn about it. Indeed, we have had a most pleasant ride this morning, and I am keen to break my fast. Come, tend to me, both of you, so we may then go and eat," Lord Aylesford said. 

"Yes, my Lord," Sir Roy said with a bow. 

"What would you have me do, my Lord?" Hugh asked.

"Hugh, you will bathe me. I daresay you will have more affinity with flame magic than Sir Roy. I think you will work the magic better than he will. Sir Roy, you will dress me. You are more familiar with my dressing than Hugh is. I will see you soon, Sir Roy," Lord Aylesford said as he took Hugh by the arm and led him past Sir Roy and into the small bathing chamber.

Sir Roy did not feel excluded. He did love dressing his Lord very much. While they were otherwise occupied, Sir Roy prepared the Earl's outfit for the day. Part of his responsibilities of being his companion was knowing what he needed to wear on a daily basis in case he was called upon to fulfil his duty and dress his Lord. Sir Roy did not always get the chance; sometimes, the valet tended to those duties, leaving Sir Roy with nothing to do but accompany Lord Aylesford. He did not mind, though. After quite some amount of negotiation and compensation, Lord Aylesford had arranged for Sir Roy to formally serve as his valet when they were travelling on the condition that he also trained the footman at the same time so that he might step into that role one day. 

All his added responsibilities had somewhat derailed Sir Roy from his magical work. It was true that he did not feel he had as much work to do on his project than he had feared, and he had negotiated with both Lord Capill and Lord Aylesford as to what he was to achieve with his music magic so he had something to aim for. He was still prone to putting his responsibilities as companion before his magical education, though, and Lord Aylesford sometimes had to command him to go and work on it in order for him to get any work done. 

He was making progress, though. The piece of music magic he had used for his final exam before entering into his Apprenticeship was sufficiently advanced that Sir Roy had turned his attention to documenting and explaining how to cast music magic. Lord Albion had encouraged a more theoretical project than a practical one, if only because no one else could write theory on music magic than the one who had discovered it. And if Sir Roy managed to create another music magic spell by the end of his Apprenticeship that was as impressive as the first piece he'd created, well, all the better. 

Sir Roy still managed to find room to panic, though. He was worried Lord Albion would make good his threat to give him a second degree based on his Apprenticeship work alone. Sir Roy didn't think he deserved such an accolade. He did not even think he had discovered a new form of magic; as far as he was concerned, it was just a new method of casting the old magic. Aleiphos still produced holy fire, after all, whether cast with gesture or sound. 

Sir Roy was also struck with a deep sense of embarrassment at being lauded so much, particularly when he knew it made Hugh jealous. He had always believed that Hugh was the better wizzard, much more creative and dangerous with his casting. Hugh should be getting accolades, not Sir Roy. Sir Roy just felt everyone was trying to make up for the fact that he'd lost so many of his family members. Gifts made from pity did not make Sir Roy feel any better about himself and his skills. Meanwhile, Hugh was alone and struggling to find anyone who believed in him and his magic the way Sir Roy did. It just didn't sit right with him at all.

These thoughts preoccupied Sir Roy as he prepared the Earl's clothes. He set everything out properly, as he'd been taught, and brushed down his jacket. His boots were polished, and made ready for him. In some ways, it was a tedious job, but Sir Roy enjoyed every moment of it. He was allowed to touch the Earl in such intimate ways when he was dressing him. He was allowed to just spend time enjoying his body as it was, scars and all. He may, perhaps, not allow himself to get too carried away, not that morning, as he did not wish for Hugh to witness their intimacy for fear of making him uncomfortable. It was a delicate act to keep both Lord Aylesford and Hugh in his heart without compromising his love for them both.

* * *

Hugh was surprised to see the small bathing room hidden behind a wall panel. He had heard from Sir Roy that it was there, but he had not believed him until he saw it then. He was amazed at its beauty, from the marble and tile to the statuary and the bath placed against the wall. Hugh had never been in such luxury before. 

Lord Aylesford was already undressing as Hugh gazed around in awe at what he saw. He was not entirely sure what he was meant to be doing, except perhaps to wash him, but Hugh had never really done that before. Sir Roy was the one who bothered with those things, not Hugh. But if he were to be taken on as a companion, Hugh would have to do these things too. Perhaps he ought to get used to it. 

"Close the door, if you will, Hugh. We will not be disturbed, but nevertheless, I do not bathe in such a place that anyone can merely walk in, with the exception of the bath house," Lord Aylesford said, gently prodding him with his words. 

"Oh, yes, my Lord. I'm sorry, my Lord," Hugh said with a bow. He closed the door, and watched as the Earl finished undressing. For a moment, Hugh remembered what it was Sir Roy found so attractive about him. "What should I do, my Lord? I have not done this before."

Lord Aylesford glanced back at him. "Get undressed. You require washing as well. But I will show you what to do. There is magic to cast to fill the bath, and then you will wash me. I will tutor you as you go. You will need to get used to this if you wish to be my companion, so think well on whether it is something you are willing to do." 

"Yes, my Lord. I will pay close attention to your words," Hugh replied. 

Hugh tried not to think there was anything sexual between them as he undressed. He hoped he'd made it clear that he did not really want that kind of relationship with the Earl, not when he had Sir Roy, but there was another part of him that knew he'd obey if the Earl asked it of him. He was not so foolish as to throw away a willing patron, even if it meant perhaps sharing intimacy with him every so often. It was not as if he did not enjoy sharing intimacy with the Earl, either, as that was how he had come to understand Sir Roy's attraction to him. 

"Now, I am not sure if you have ever seen this sort of technology before, Hugh. It is magical hot water, and you should know how to fill the bath. Here, this is the gesture you need," Lord Aylesford said, showing him what to do.

Hugh attempted to copy it, making his right hand into the gesture for Aleiphos, holy fire, with his fingers curled into a point, which sat downwards in his left hand, formed into a cup. "Like this, my Lord?"

"Yes, that is correct. The spell is _Ignigenae Aquae_. It will fill the bath from the tank in the cellar, heated by perpetual fire. Let me demonstrate it for you, and then you will attempt to cast it. Hopefully, you will have more luck with it than Sir Roy did," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh watched as Lord Aylesford cast the spell. At his word, the bath began filling with water flowing from the pipe bent around to flow into it. It was steaming hot, from what Hugh could tell, and he peered over to see if it was indeed real. He touched it with his fingers, and was pleasantly surprised to find hot water. 

"I am most impressed, my Lord. Is this another one of your ingenious creations?" Hugh asked. 

"Lord Stafford's, actually. I cannot claim this as my own invention. I wish it was more common, but I believe there are only ten systems in the entire kingdom. It has revolutionised our lives here, and has saved my servants from carting hot water in for me and my ladies to bathe in. Now all I need to do is train them to use the magic. Everyone is much happier this way," Lord Aylesford said. He clapped his hands and the water stopped. "Now, I will empty the bath, and then you will fill it yourself. Make sure you are channelling Flame properly, as its power is needed to make the spell work."

Hugh nodded. "Yes, my Lord. I will do my best."

Lord Aylesford pulled a lever to empty the water, and once it was empty, it was time for Hugh to attempt the spell. He felt he might be able to do it; he had always had a better relationship with Flame than Sir Roy did. He felt its warm caress as he invited the element to run through him. He was sure it didn't particularly like him, but it seemed willing to do what he wanted it to do, which was as good as relationships with Flame generally tended to be. With the gesture formed, Hugh spent a moment concentrating before he cast the spell. 

" _Ignigenae Aquae_ ," Hugh spoke, his voice firm and authoritative. After a moment, the water began to flow into the bath, and Hugh smiled broadly, pleased with his work. 

Lord Aylesford was impressed. "Very good work, Hugh. I thought you'd be better tuned to it. Once it's filled, we can bathe. I hope you will not dislike us being so intimate, but I think the bath will do you good after the ride this morning."

"Indeed, my Lord. I thank you for your concern. I do not mind this, but I would prefer to be sexually intimate with Sir Roy only, if that is not too much to ask of you. I would not want to cause offence, though," Hugh said.

"You have caused no offence, Hugh. I would not force anything on you that you would not be comfortable with. I am more than willing to step back and give you and Sir Roy room for your relationship to grow. Your happiness is most important to me, and I will not get in the way of that. I have my own love, and I know Sir Roy is so important to you, given all you have shared together," Lord Aylesford said.

"I thank you, my Lord, for understanding. It is not that I do not appreciate being intimate with you, because you are a fine man, and a generous and kind lover, but I would rather only share such intimacy with Sir Roy. I know this is a strange thing to say in such a household, but that is where I stand on these matters, and I would like to make that clear to you before we go any further with our relationship," Hugh said.

"Please, you do not need to explain yourself. I would never insist on anything you do not wish to do. Our relationship does not need to be that intimate, if it is not something you desire from me. I would be happy enough being your patron and mentor. In spite of what you may think of me, I am not the sort of man who is voracious and promiscuous. I share my love with very few," Lord Aylesford said.

"Of course, my Lord. I did not mean to imply that you were, well, I am ashamed that I have even implied such a thing. I did not mean to slander you, my Lord," Hugh said.

"Will you stop apologising, Hugh? It is getting a little tiresome, particularly since I feel you have nothing to apologise for. Now, come, smile, and let the water soak your anxieties away," Lord Aylesford said, inviting him into the bath.

Hugh bowed his head a little, unable to help himself. "Yes, my Lord. Of course."

Hugh waited until Lord Aylesford was sitting in the bath before he got in, taking a seat near, but not immediately close to him. The water was nice, and the bath was nice. The water, Hugh noticed, smelt of sweet roses. 

"I wish you would stop being so formal with me when we are alone. There is no need to stand on protocol at such a time. Being my companion necessitates a certain intimacy that will not tolerate such deference to my authority. We are as equals, Hugh, not master and servant. In spite of how you see yourself, you are still the son of a Mage, and a baronet. You may not respect your father, but his position in society is a privileged one, as is yours. He has still paid for all your magical tuition, has he not? A man who wanted to disinherit his son would not be so generous to him," Lord Aylesford said.

The Earl's words struck him as quite odd, and he tilted his head to the side as he thought about them. It was true that his tuition at the Academy had been paid for by his father. Hugh had never been prevented from studying because he was in arrears. It was a jarring thought, and not one that matched up with his experiences. 

"He may have done that, my Lord, but it does not make up for a lifetime of neglect," Hugh countered.

"I was not implying it did anything of the sort. I was merely reminding you of your relative privilege. You are not a pauper. You have had an education that few have access to, which your family was able and willing to pay for. You have your own independence, and once you are degreed, your own capacity to make your own fortunes. This is not something most experience, my friend. Do remind yourself of that every now and then when you feel like the whole world is against you. Many do not have what you have. They will never learn a lick of magic, some may never even go to school. Just remember that when you feel like you are a common peasant bowing to an Earl," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh took a deep breath as he thought of his words. The Earl was right, of course. Objectively, he knew he was very well-off, relative to many around him. The students at the Academy all came from the gentry and the nobility, sons of wizzards, even. It was an exclusive sort of place, and rank and title were not left at the family estate. 

Hugh remembered bitterly the taunts of some of his peers, sons of nobles who felt they owned the place. Coming from the landed gentry, being a commoner, Hugh had been bullied for his place, as well as for being Catholic. It did not help Hugh feel like he was welcome or accepted, and while a lesser man may have shrunk from it and become feeble and weak, Hugh just felt he needed to prove himself. He would be better than them, he would climb higher than them, create his own perpetual fire, the sort of thing that would change society for the better. 

He still held onto those desires, and felt them more strongly, knowing he was on the cusp of acquiring a title of his own. And unlike a Peerage, which was inherited, he could feel proud that he had earned that title of Mage, fair and square. No one could disinherit him from that title, not at all. It would be his alone, proof of his power and achievements. In many ways, that was why it meant more to him than his father's baronetcy. Anyone could inherit a title - well, not just anyone, but there was no skill in acquiring it. One just had to be a firstborn male son, and that only ever happened by chance, no matter how many prayers one sent to God. 

It took great skill and persistence to earn the title of Mage. It involved many years of hard work, the right sort of mind, and a willingness to experiment. And even then, earning a first degree was relatively easier than earning a second or third degree. Hugh took pride in the fact that many Apprentices did not go on to move beyond a first degree, particularly the ones from noble families, unless they showed a certain drive and determination to dedicate their lives to magic. Younger sons, more often than not, who may need a title and income for themselves, if they did not inherit. 

"They still called me a common street magician, though. I was a fool, a jester, a turner of tricks. A conman, even," Hugh said, breaking the silence. "I was never good enough for some of my - peers."

"Yes, the arrogance of Peers can be intolerable, particularly in the young and fervent sons. Do not feel you are the only one to have experienced it. I know Sir Richard suffered for it as well, particularly before he inherited his baronetcy, as have many others in your position. I did my best to love his hurts away when he became my Apprentice and companion. We are not all cruel tormentors," Lord Aylesford said.

"I appreciate that, my Lord. I know it is not true of all of them, but it is hard to believe that until you meet a lord such as yourself," Hugh said.

"Indeed. I am sorry you were treated so poorly, and if I can but make up for it in even the slightest way, I shall be happy enough with that," Lord Aylesford said. 

"I appreciate it, my Lord, I really do," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford brought an arm around his shoulders, bringing him close. Hugh did rather like the way he held him, more like a concerned father than anything else. Lord Aylesford had Sir Roy's ability to talk him back from his bouts of melancholy, for which he was eternally grateful. Indeed, they had not been as bad as they used to be, which gave him hope that he might yet defeat it. 

"I truly appreciate your friendship, my Lord. I daresay you have saved me, as Sir Roy has saved me. My soul is forever in your debt," Hugh said after a while.

"Please, call me Charles. We are friends, Hugh. There is a time for formality, and that time is not now, not if you wish to be my companion. No, we are but two men on this good green Earth, stripped back to nothing," Lord Aylesford replied.

"You gift me too much intimacy, m- Charles. But you're right. Once I am a Mage, I will have my own title. I think I will feel better about things then. I still wish to be your companion, if you would accept me. I thought I would never find a place I belonged other than the Academy, but I have found it here," Hugh said.

"Give it time, Hugh. These things cannot be rushed. You are an impatient soul, but it will do you no good to rush me. If I will court you for this role, I will do it properly. I am a man of my word, and I could not bring myself to take shortcuts. I think you would benefit more from taking the time to consider the role, as you will know better whether you really desire it. Consider yourself a novice in a monastery, if you will, as I teach you about the role, and prepare you for it. We must both decide it is the best thing for you, considering you do not wish for a more romantically-inclined companionship as Sir Roy has. We will need the time to negotiate terms and boundaries, after all. Do you agree that this is the best course of action? Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh thought on his words a moment before nodding. "Yes, that sounds entirely reasonable. I am sorry if I am impatient. It is a fault of mine, for which I apologise. I like certainty, Charles. I was so anxious all summer until I knew I had a supervisor for my Apprenticeship, aside from my dispute with Sir Roy, of course. I was genuinely afraid I would be thrown out and forced to move back home with my parents. I am glad you have saved me from that fate."

"I thought I had already made it clear I wish to keep you on as long as you desire it? I would be a willing patron for you, and you will need one if you decide not to teach at the Academy to pay your way in the world. But I do not wish to make you feel as if I am your only option. You are respected as a talented wizzard, like your father before you. Do not despair about finding a patron. It will be easier than you think if you decide to go elsewhere. You may not like your father, but his name will make things much easier. His reputation will be enough to get you whatever you require in this world, and I don't think you have ever really appreciated that due to the nature of the relationship you have with him," Lord Aylesford said.

"Is he really that beloved? I know I am biased, of course. I have had the misfortune to live with him. It is not as if I set out to hate him from the moment of my birth. I spent much of my childhood trying to find reasons to love them, but by the time I was ten, I lost all hope of that happening. I am envious of your children, Charles, because I know they will have what I did not. I am glad of that, of course, but I wish my own life had been different. Perhaps I would not be so bent over with melancholy if they had just found it in their hearts to love me," Hugh said.

"One cannot change the past, Hugh, only live for the future. You could have given up long ago, but you persist. You possess great resilience, my friend, and it is this that convinces me that you will be fine. You will acquire your degree, and you will have yourself a patron, and you will do great things. You just need to believe in yourself a little more," Lord Aylesford said. "But I think we have conversed enough. We would not wish to keep Sir Roy waiting."

"Of course not. I will tend to you, then. I have washed Sir Roy enough to know what to do. It was one of the few intimate pleasures we shared before we became joined," Hugh said.

"I had suspected as much. I remember doing the same when I was at the Academy. In many ways, I miss it," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh reached for the cloth sitting on the edge of the bath and rubbed some soap into it. Taking great care, he began washing the Earl's body. It felt just as good as when he had done the same for Sir Roy. Perhaps Hugh would never love the Earl in the same way as he loved Sir Roy, but he could still appreciate him and care for him. He washed his body, and cleaned his hair, ridding it of sweat and grime. When he was done, the Earl took the cloth and washed Hugh in return. He was tender, and Hugh was surprised at how nonsexual it was. Perhaps this relationship could work, after all.

* * *

Sir Roy was waiting for them when Hugh and Lord Aylesford emerged from the bathing room. He had taken it upon himself to lay out some clothes for Hugh, as well, just so he did not feel left out. Sir Roy loved dressing the Earl, and perhaps, if Hugh would allow it, Sir Roy might dress him too. 

"I see you have everything prepared, my friend. You do have such a good eye for these things. I see you have set out something for Hugh as well. If you were not gentry, I would hire you as my valet," Lord Aylesford said.

Sir Roy bowed a little to him. "It is my preferred way to serve you, my Lord. I hope, Hugh, that you do not take offence at this liberty. I did not wish to leave you out as I dressed my Lord."

Hugh was not offended; he was surprised by the implication Sir Roy wanted to serve Hugh in that way, as well. "You have not caused me any offence, Roy. I would be honoured to be dressed by you. Lord Aylesford is right; you have a good eye for this."

"If you don't mind, I will dress Hugh first, and then you, my Lord," Sir Roy said.

"Certainly. I would hardly see any reason to do otherwise. I will enjoy watching you from a distance," Lord Aylesford said.

"Come, Hugh, I will finish drying you off, and then I will dress you," Sir Roy said, taking Hugh's hand as he led him to the dressing area.

Sir Roy took a towel and carefully finished drying Hugh's body, making sure it was fit to be dressed. Hugh was not used to this sort of treatment, but he did discover how nice it felt. Sir Roy was very careful and diligent, and his touch was tender and soft. Hugh was also surprised by the lack of any sort of sexual layer to what he was doing. It seemed Sir Roy really did just enjoy the process of dressing someone in a way that was completely non-sexual. In some ways, it was a little strange, considering the nature of their relationship, but Sir Roy gave him no reason to be aroused, and so, it turned out, he was not.

Sir Roy really was a natural valet, Hugh decided, as he watched him begin dressing him. He'd never had much experience with valets, given his father mostly refused to share his on the rare occasions when he was home. No, Hugh had met them elsewhere, in other houses, and had come to know how good they could be. It was one of the few moments of personal intimacy he had in his life, before he had forged a more intimate relationship with Sir Roy. Being touched like that was something he had always craved.

Sir Roy sat him down at the dresser and began brushing out his hair. It was tangled and a little damp, but it would dry in time. Sir Roy left it out, letting his hair trail down his back. Hugh couldn't help shivering at the sensation.

Sir Roy smiled as he brushed the yellow streak of hair. "I am glad you are getting streaks at last, Hugh. I was beginning to worry about your skills."

"Coloured streaks alone do not a wizzard make, my dear friend! I was completely competent without them, though at least people will now believe me when I say I am a wizzard," Hugh mused. 

"Shall I braid your hair, Hugh? I am never sure how you like it done. You do not seem to care as much as I do," Sir Roy said.

"My hair is not as uncontrollable as yours, but braid it if you wish. It matters not to me," Hugh said.

Sir Roy brushed the length of hair again before deciding he would braid it. It had been a long time since he had done this on another person; Lord Aylesford did not personally like the style and Sir Roy was used to merely brushing and tying the hair up at the base of his neck. Sir Roy would appreciate the chance to practice it on someone else. 

Hugh's hair was reasonably thin compared to his own, Sir Roy decided. It was smooth and straight, and did not submit to the braiding easily. Perhaps that was how the magic had affected his hair, Sir Roy thought, as he fought hard to make the braid stay. The hair tangled in his fingers, but he did eventually finish what he started. 

"I hope you are pleased with it, Hugh. I have not braided another's hair for a long time," Sir Roy said when he was finished, tying the braid off with a piece of ribbon.

"It will suffice, Roy. Is there anything I can do for you once you are done with me?" Hugh asked.

"You should ask Lord Aylesford that, not me. I am merely doing my duty," Sir Roy said. "Stand, so I may finish dressing you."

Hugh obediently stood, moving away from the dresser to where Sir Roy had laid out his clothes. Sir Roy helped him into his shirt, vest, and coat, brushing him down as he finished. Sir Roy was pleased with his work, and once he was done with Hugh, moved onto the Earl, who had been standing aside, watching them.

"You are very good at this work, Roy. I wish I could employ you as my valet permanently. You will do a good job teaching my footman, though, I can be sure of that," Lord Aylesford said.

"I shall do my best, my Lord," Sir Roy said.

Taking a clean towel, Sir Roy turned his attention to the Earl, beginning to dry him down. It took a lot of effort not to get too carried away; there would be a time for sexual intimacy later. Sir Roy was nevertheless wise to the Earl's hardening prick as he tenderly dried his body. Sir Roy would not touch it, though he did allow himself a small smile for being able to make the Earl react in such a way.

Sir Roy dressed him in hose and trousers and boots before sitting him down at the dresser to brush his hair. The Earl's hair was long and dark, thick and coarse. It was, on the whole, much better behaved than his own, and it submitted willingly to Sir Roy's brush. Sir Roy was tempted to braid it, but knowing the Earl was not fond of it, he instead merely brushed it until it was smooth, and then tied it at the nape of his neck, letting the hair lie unbound down his back. Sir Roy caught Lord Aylesford's smile in the mirror, and smiled back, knowing he was doing a good job. 

It was always a little difficult managing the shirt, vest, and coat. Lord Aylesford was taller than him, and while Sir Roy could reach well enough, he still felt a little less significant next to him. The man, after wall, was a seasoned warrior. His body was strong and capable. Sir Roy's body was weak and feeble, not suited to battle. Sir Roy did not feel quite so much shame about this as he used to, but he still felt as if he were no good, given how his physique was so different to that of his master. 

Not that Lord Aylesford was his master, exactly. They were companions, and equals, yes, but neither denied their difference in ranks, much in all as they tried not to take notice of them. Sir Roy still felt like an underling, someone who ought to be a servant, not a companion. He was, after all, a member of the gentry, not the nobility. Yes, he himself had certain privileges from that position, but he was not a nobleman. His title did not entitle him to a seat in the House of Lords, like the Earl had. All Sir Roy could really lay claim to was the title, land, and wealth. There was a reason he was a commoner. 

Lord Aylesford offered a kiss of appreciation once he was done. Sir Roy enjoyed it, but did not linger too long, not while Hugh was nearby. But then Hugh kissed him too, as if goaded by the Earl, and Sir Roy wasn't really sure what to do about that. He felt as if he were lost in the middle, with two equally deserving men vying for his hand. But he knew, in his heart, that he could not just choose one of them to the exclusion of the other. Sir Roy was not capable of that, much as others might have wanted him to do so. 

But Hugh was not like that, Sir Roy was discovering. Hugh just wanted Sir Roy, and it left Sir Roy feeling quite guilty. He did not know what to do to make the situation better, because he felt he might lose them both if he dared to intervene. Hugh would certainly argue with him if he thought Sir Roy was going to choose the Earl. Sir Roy was certain Lord Aylesford did not care, but that was not the point. Hugh's jealousy was not something to get in the way of. 

"May I inquire as to your discussions this morning, my Lord, if it is not too presumptuous to ask?" Sir Roy asked.

"We will talk after breakfast. I have some things I need to discuss with you both that may change the way we do things here, and I would rather do this sooner rather than later, if that is acceptable," Lord Aylesford said.

"Of course, my Lord. I will wait until then. I am sorry for seeming too eager about this. I do not wish to pry," Sir Roy said.

Lord Aylesford brushed him off. "It is nothing, Sir Roy. Let it not trouble you. Come, we will eat, and then we will talk."

Sir Roy bowed his head. "Yes, my Lord."


	8. Chapter 8

Lord Aylesford led them to the sacred grove once they had eaten, and spent time in morning prayers. Sir Roy did not know why they were being led to the grove, and Hugh did not know, either. Hugh wondered how much this would change things between them if it became clear that Hugh wished to be a companion, and did not wish to take the Earl as a sexual partner. He wanted to have Sir Roy all to himself, but he knew he would not get his way. Still, he did not know how this would go, and hoped it would not ruin things between then, because this was the only place where Hugh had ever felt loved. He would not give that up without a fight.

"We are here, my friends, to talk about rituals. Hugh, Roy, you wish to be so bound, and I am willing to support such a ceremony. Roy, you may also be aware that Hugh wishes to be my second companion in addition to you, which would require another ceremony to bind us together. I say this to make the situation clear, so that we all know and agree to what is going on. I do not want a house filled with discontent, and I am aware of your need to finish your Apprenticeships. So, out here, I will ask you to speak freely and candidly, because I will not have secrets and lies rotting our relationships away," Lord Aylesford said.

"I feel you are asking for an ultimatum, my Lord, and I do not like such a suggestion. What, pray, are we meant to be discussing?" Sir Roy said, trying not to sound too afraid.

"I did not wish to alarm you, Roy, but I want us all to be clear where we stand, as lovers and friends, so that we are not in any confusion about our roles and duties to each other. Is that understood?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord. I do not have any issues with Hugh becoming your companion. I feel it is appropriate, given his place and his importance to us both," Sir Roy said.

"I just wish to feel as if I have a proper place in this house, other than being your Apprentice, my Lord. If that means becoming your companion, so be it. You have shown me what love is, my Lord, and I will not give that up, not now. But I am troubled. You are aware I do not seek the sort of intimate relationship with you that you share with Sir Roy, and I will not lie to you when I say that knowing he shares your bed does trouble me. I do not know what to do about this, though," Hugh said.

"I will ask nothing of you, Hugh, that makes you uncomfortable, and I am sure Roy is sensitive to your concerns. I have tried to ensure that our relationship does not disturb you, but if that is still the case, perhaps we ought to find a way to make us all happy," Lord Aylesford said.

"One of my hesitations in asking for you to come and stay here, Hugh, was knowing you may not like seeing me sharing his bed. I was not sure you would accept it, given how you feel about me. But I ask both of you not to ask me to choose, for if I did, I fear I would decide not to choose, because the thought of losing just one of you fills me with grief and fear. I do not feel as if I know what to do at all," Sir Roy said.

"I would sooner let you go with Hugh than make you unhappy, Roy. I love you dearly, but your happiness is most important. Knowing what you both have been through, I would not wish to cause you any further grief," Lord Aylesford said. "What is it that specifically troubles you about Roy sharing my bed? What can be done to alleviate your stress and discomfort surrounding this matter?"

"It is not just one thing, my Lord. Perhaps I am just not capable of loving more than one person unlike you and Sir Roy. The thought of him sharing your bed, my Lord, of finding love in your bed that he does not find with me, makes me afraid. Who am I to compete with an Earl?" Hugh said, shrugging helplessly.

"Is there any situation where you would feel most comfortable?" Lord Aylesford asked.

"I do not feel I am in any position to declare that. After all, he is your companion, and has every right to share your bed," Hugh said.

"You would have that same right to share my bed as Roy does now if you were my companion, Hugh. Would you be willing to come to bed with me?" Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh wasn't sure. "I would sleep beside you, I think, my Lord. I cannot be sure of anything further."

"Perhaps you ought to share my bed before you become my companion, just to see how willing you are to submit to it. I would never force it upon you, but it is an aspect of the role you would be expected to fulfil from time to time, particularly if we are away from home," Lord Aylesford said.

"I wish you would not imply that it requires sexual intimacy. I think that puts me off, my Lord, as that is not what I want from you," Hugh said.

"I have never implied that companionship with me necessarily involves sexual intimacy. It has been associated with the role, and some lords and companions have had that sort of relationship, but not all have been that way. My father, for instance, did not have that kind of relationship with Sir Frederick when he served as his companion. They were very close friends, but they did not share that sort of intimacy. I know this, because my father wrote of it in his diaries. I believe he would have eluded to any sexual relationship had it existed, but it is not there," Lord Aylesford said.

"I still find it strange they were companions, my Lord. I feel as if I did not know my father at all," Sir Roy said.

"It is not your fault for not knowing these things. Your father died before you ever had a chance to get to know him," Lord Aylesford said.

"I still wish I had known more about him, but there is nothing I can do about that now," Sir Roy said.

"At least your father is known for being a good man. Mine will forever live in my mind as a despicable man, in spite of his magical powers. He was incapable of loving his only son," Hugh said bitterly.

"That is not your fault, either, Hugh. It is no wonder you are so hungry for love. You have been unfairly deprived of it your whole life. I may not be able to be a proper father to you, but I can at least love you, whether we share sexual intimacy together or not. I would not love you any less for wishing to be companions above all else, rather than lovers," Lord Aylesford said.

Lord Aylesford brought him close, and Hugh allowed himself to be close to the Earl. He was still feeling conflicted. 

"I am trying to believe you, my Lord, but it is difficult," Hugh said.

"Do not feel pressured into taking a companionship with me, Hugh. It is not the only way for you. I am afraid you may think this is the only way you can feel a part of this household, but I assure you, that is not the case. No one needs to have any particular role in this household to be a part of it. Don't force yourself to take on something that will only make you unhappy. I dread to think what that melancholy might do to you," Lord Aylesford said.

"Now I feel you are trying to discourage me again, though I am not sure this is the case. You make it sound like you do not want me if I will not have sex with you," Hugh said.

"That is not what I am trying to say. You are letting your fears cloud your vision. You are hearing what you expect to hear, not what I am actually saying," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh bowed his head, feeling chastised again. "I try, my Lord. I am trying so hard, but I feel like I would never be enough for you."

"I have friends and lovers in equal measures. I do not preference one above the other. The man I shared my room with at the Academy, for example, has never been my lover, but I love him like a brother. Sexual intimacy is not so important I will disregard my oldest and closest friend because of the non-sexual nature of our relationship," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh could concede that made sense. He felt, perhaps, that his inabililty to understand was perhaps due to the lack of friends he had. All he had ever had was Sir Roy, and their relationship was complicated and bound up in childhood memories and imaginings. Sir Roy had always been by his side, save for the previous summer. Hugh felt he was more than a friend, more than a lover, more than any word could ever contain. To be without him was inconceivable. 

"I wish I had friends enough to know the difference, my Lord. All I have ever had is Sir Roy, and that is complicated enough," Hugh said eventually.

"I do wish you'd stop apologising for that. You are sounding like a martyr, and it depresses me," Sir Roy said.

Hugh lowered his head. "I am being candid, as my Lord has asked of me. If you do not like it, Sir Roy, you may leave. I will not force you to stay and listen to me if you would rather be elsewhere."

Sir Roy felt chastened, realising how Hugh had interpreted his words. "Oh, I am sorry, I did not mean to speak like that. I just wish you would speak of the good in your life rather than what you lack. Are there not good things in your life?"

Hugh shrugged. "I have my faith and God's grace. There is you, and there is my Lord, and there is my Apprenticeship. These are all I have in the entire world. It is not much, but it is more than I have had in a long time. I am trying to be grateful, but I am not used to having anything to be grateful for. Forgive me if it takes me a while to become accustomed to this."

"You have matured, Hugh, trust me. I have noticed the improvements in your mood, and so have your teachers. You cannot be so blind to how much you have changed since we have been together," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh thought about his words. He hadn't thought about himself in those terms before. He suspected he may have been too busy with his magic to notice. And yet, he felt there was some truth in them. He no longer woke feeling the darkness merely closing in around him. The dark thoughts that often led to his bouts of melancholy had lessened. They had not gone away completely, but they did not obsess his mind as they had done before. He had not entirely realised this until that moment, and finally acknowledging the relief he felt was threatening to overwhelm him. It did not feel like the sort of relief he ought to be celebrating; he had not been cured. He had no idea if melancholy was the sort of thing that could ever be cured. But he could see bright sunshine now, the fire of God's grace, where once all he saw was the dark clouds of Hell. He was changing, he was being changed, and his burden was being lifted, just a little.

"I had not realised it was so apparent to others. It was not apparent to me, my Lord. I have lived with it for so long, I scarcely know how else to exist. I do not know how else to feel, to live. I have lived with this all my life. I have learnt to cope with it. I don't know how to be anything else, and I have been so busy, I have not had the time for reverie and introspection," Hugh said. "But you are right, of course. I just could not see it. I never thought the darkness would ever go away."

Lord Aylesford gently touched his back, rubbing gently in a bid to soothe him. "That you have seen it at all is what is important, not how long it takes to do so. Let God heal your sad soul and return you to life. You have many gifts that you can offer the world. Do not deprive God of your skills, not when you could change the lives of so many for the better."

"You can really see it, can't you? You're not just trying to make me feel better," Hugh said.

"I would not lie about this. I would not offer hollow words. Hollow words do not feed the soul. It would do you no good. I care about you too much to lie to you," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh gazed at him, pondering his words. He did believe him, but it was still incredible to behold. The man beside him had been far too good to him, and he was still trying to convince himself he deserved it.

"I think, perhaps, that you need more time to settle, Hugh, before I would formally give you more duties than what you currently have. I think you need more time to heal, to let love shine through you and wash away all your sadness. I will have you as a companion, in that sense alone, and Sir Roy can tend to his other duties as he is more used to it. You need a friend more than a master, Hugh," Lord Aylesford said, making up his mind about what to do with him.

"But I thought - didn't you say there was a process? You needed to court me, and Lady Aylesford - she needed to accept me. I could not - I cannot accept this, not like this," Hugh said, shying away from his offer. 

Lord Aylesford brought an arm around his shoulders and brought him close. "All I ask of you is your companionship. Stay close, and accept my friendship. That is all I will ever ask of you during this time. Once you finish your Apprenticeship, then we will talk about a more formal role. I will see you degreed first, because then you can be a man of independent means. I will be here to guide and teach you, to support and love you. Would you accept this from me?"

Hugh felt that he thought about it for a long time. He was aware of Sir Roy taking his hand gently, and of Lord Aylesford merely being there beside him, but he was deep in thought. The Earl's offer was not an unreasonable one, and given he had made it perfectly clear that he was willing to be his patron, his future was looking much more secure than he had ever imagined before he had finished his formal tuition. He would have a good employer, a secure income, and, in time, the ability to acquire his own property. That the Earl was willing to allow them to be friends and not lovers, that he understood that Hugh did not want or need sexual intimacy from him and was willing to accommodate that, reassured him that this could work. 

"Yes, my Lord. I would accept this from you. Only, I ask for a ring, so that I can prove I am your companion. I will undergo the rites if you ask them of me, but let me wear your ring, so I will not feel so excluded. I will accept on those terms, my Lord," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford thought a moment. "Very well, I accept your terms, Hugh. I think you really want to undergo the rites, because then you will feel Sir Roy's equal, but we will leave those for now. We may need to discuss whether it is appropriate, given our different faiths. It may be that we may also have a magical rite, if that proves more suitable."

"I will leave that decision in your hands, my Lord. For now, I am just glad things are not as dire as I have often believed them to be," Hugh said.

* * *

Later that afternoon, Hugh rode back to the Academy. He had been thinking much about the conversation he had with the Earl in the baths the night before, and could not get the perpetual fire out of his head. He still wondered why he had left it at the Academy when he had moved to Packington. Certainly, he had left enough behind so he might stay overnight if he had been working, but most of his things had been taken to the Earl's estate. All he had left at the Academy was the perpetual fire, some books and papers, and a couple of sets of clothes.

Leaving Pluto in the stables, he went to his room, and found the perpetual fire lantern sitting on his desk, where he had left it. He had never particularly given it much importance, except as light and warmth. The flame did remind him of the Holy Spirit, and God's love, but it had never been a particularly important thing to him. He had been very young when he had received it, and had not fully grasped why or who had given it to him at the time. All he really remembered was a man in fancy clothing had come to the Academy and given everyone a lantern with fire in it that never went out. 

Sitting at his desk, he brought the lantern in front of him. The lantern itself was somewhat ornate, though primarily made from iron and glass. An inscription in Latin had been written around the bottom of the lantern: "Given by His Majesty King Charles, by the Grace of God, for the people of Great Britain, in the Year of Our Lord, 1760, on the occasion of His Coronation. The Light of God shines forever." 

Hugh had never really taken all of that in before. It had been given as a coronation present, after all. There was something quite touching in the fact he, a Catholic, had even been given one. That the King had not discriminated in giving perpetual fire to Anglicans and Dissenters, rich and poor alike, said more for his character than Hugh had ever seen in him before. 

He had been brought up to hate him, an illegitimate Protestant King. He would go to mass in secret every week and hear talk of the illegitimacy of the Crown, and the need to depose him so they might restore the Catholic Church to its rightful place on the throne. He would be surrounded by people who cursed the King and His name, in spite of the perpetual fire the King had given them. 

Hugh particularly remembered one service where several members of the congregation, including his own mother, had smashed their lanterns in protest, though it did not much good as the fire did not go out, and had to be magically extinguished by the only wizzard in the chapel, his father. Hugh had not stayed afterwards and fled back to the Academy, not willing to listen to his parents arguing. He returned to his room and sat with his lantern for the rest of the day, unsure what to feel about it. It was a gift from the King he hated, but it had come to represent the light of God, and he needed that more than caring about who had given it to him.

The lantern was not quite as shiny as it had been when he'd first received it. He found a rag at the bottom of a drawer and began rubbing it down, trying to make it gleam like it once had done. He drew the covers over the glass to clean them, hiding the flame from sight for a moment. There was nothing but a small glow from the top of the lantern, all that remained of its light. In spire of this, the fire inside seemed to shine brighter as he cleaned the lantern, as if it was responding to his care. Hugh wondered if he might wish to clean it more frequently if this was the response it gave.

He sat back once he was done. The lantern gleamed now that it had been cleaned and the dirt removed. The fire danced happily inside, and Hugh was almost convinced it was happy. The effect of being in its presence also seemed to lift his mood. He smiled, taking in its warmth and joy. Something about the flame had touched him greatly, always had, and its ability to push away the dark thoughts in his mind, even for a little while, was not something he was willing to lose. Perhaps that was why he had kept it so long.

He decided then that he would take the lantern back to Packington with him. Perhaps he would keep it with him more often, rather than leaving it on his desk all the time, lost and forgotten when he wasn't there at the Academy. He did not spend much time at the Academy anymore, given the nature of his project, so there did not seem to be much purpose to it remaining there. The lantern seemed to want to come with him, so taking it in hand, he went to ride back to Packington.

* * *

Hugh arrived back to find Lord Aylesford was waiting for him in the library. Deciding against first taking his lantern to his room, he went straight to meet him, wondering what he wanted. Hugh had arrived back later than he'd intended, and night was closing in, but it was not so bad. He had his lantern and his protective magic to keep him safe as he rode back in the disappearing light. 

Lord Aylesford was reading when Hugh got to the library. Hugh had always liked it. With one large window at one end, and high ceilings, it was beautifully light and cheery. The books were stacked high around the room in ornate shelves, and there was a desk and chair towards the middle of the room, as well as a couple of arm chairs by the window.

"You wished to see me, my Lord?" Hugh said as he approached him.

Lord Aylesford looked up at him. "Ahh, yes, I was waiting for you to return. You have missed supper, my friend, and I did not wish for you to eat alone. What have you been up to? Sir Roy said you had gone to the Academy?" 

Hugh nodded. "I went to retrieve my lantern, my Lord, the one His Majesty gave to me. I have been thinking about what you had told me, about the fire, and I decided I ought to have it with me. It does make me feel better to have it close by."

"I did wonder why you were carrying it. Is that the original lantern?" Lord Aylesford asked.

"Yes, it is. I haven't kept it in the best condition, but it is the original. It still has the Latin inscription around the base to mark its purpose," Hugh said. "Do you still have yours, my Lord?"

"I believe the original lantern is at Aylesford House. I actually had three smaller lanterns made and split the flame into them, so I could have one at St Barthomew's, one at Aylesford House, and one for the house," Lord Aylesford said.

"That is a good idea, my Lord. I wish I had thought to do the same. Either way, I still have my original lantern. That is enough for me," Hugh said. "I am sorry to have kept you waiting, though. I did not wish to deprive you of your supper."

Lord Aylesford brushed him off. "It is no trouble. I was not that hungry at the time. If you are ready for supper, I will have ours prepared now, unless you wish to bathe first."

Hugh shook his head. "No, my Lord, I will eat first. I am rather hungry. I thank you again for waiting for me. It was not necessary."

"One should never eat alone, my friend. Food is always better with company. Come, we will talk some more over supper," Lord Aylesford said as he got to his feet.

"Yes, my Lord. I would appreciate that very much," Hugh said.

* * *

Supper was taken in the dining room. Hugh felt it was a little extravagant for just the two of them, but he would not turn the Earl down. It did have a glorious view across the estate, after all, and watching it disappear into the darkness was a magical way to end the day. 

"I assume Sir Roy is elsewhere, my Lord?" Hugh asked.

"I believe he is with the ladies this evening, and if he is not, then he will be working on his magic. I thought you and I might spend some time together to work on your own magic. I would like to see these new wards you were talking about," Lord Aylesford said.

"I thought you might. I have been practicing them on the way home. I believe they can be used as personal shields as well as to protect buildings, but as I have not used them to protect buildings as yet, I will wait to pronounce them fit for such a purpose," Hugh said.

"Personal shields, you say? What good would a personal magical shield do for you?" Lord Aylesford said, intrigued by the idea. 

"Well, it has so far kept me safe while travelling home in the dusk light. I am not sure how good it really is, though, as I have not been attacked yet. I won't know how well they will protect someone until I am attacked. Perhaps I ought to goad Sir Roy into assisting in this matter. He may be able to prove either way whether this magic is effective," Hugh said.

"I am assuming it is cast with gestures, yes? How can it be so simple for such a complicated thing as warding?" Lord Aylesford said.

"I have found a way to combine gestures. I cannot explain it to you. You would be better seeing it, but as we are eating supper at the moment, I will save that demonstration for the morning. I also found a way to invoke and set in one gesture, so setting wards for the elements is less complicated and can be done faster," Hugh said.

"That sounds very impressive, Hugh. When did you develop this casting technique? You said you had been working on it while you were in the Watch?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, and no. The casting techniques I developed some time ago. Utilising them to cast wards came later when I was in the Watch," Hugh said.

"I think you ought to write essays on these new techniques for your project. More efficient ways to cast magic is indeed a great discovery," Lord Aylesford said.

"I will spend some time writing about them, then, if that is your wish. The secret to it is making the transition between gestures. Normally, we cast them quite distinctly, but if you run them together, while still being clear what you are doing, you can cast in half the time," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford was quite impressed by his discovery. "I had never thought to cast that way before. That is quite ingenious."

"I have also come up with a new notation system to take account of the running gestures. It is like cursive, my Lord, but for magical gestures. I will show you an example after supper, if you would like to see it," Hugh said.

"I would like that very much, my friend," Lord Aylesford said. "I knew you had great potential as a wizzard, Hugh. In time, the rest of the world will acknowledge that as well."

Hugh tried to look hopeful. "I hope you are right, my Lord."

* * *

Hugh took Lord Aylesford to the workshop after supper, where his magical journals were kept locked up. With his lantern to light the room, Hugh lit another couple of lanterns, and then retrieved the journal he needed. He had written up many spells in it so far, though not many had been tried. So much of his work was theoretical, and he knew he needed to change that if he would ever be able to prove they worked. He still felt they had great potential.

"These are the spells I was telling you about. See how the gesture symbols blend together? That tells me to transition between them quite quickly, rather than do one discretely after the other," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford was impressed by the notation; it was clear what gestures were being called, even though the symbols ran together. "How do you transition, then?" 

Hugh flicked his wrist, with his first two fingers forming a point with his thumb, pointing down. "There are a few other versions, as well, because I wanted to find ways that would be harmonious with the gestures and not look out of place. It had to be smooth, and that needed different transitions. I've got one that's two-handed, as well as a few other different ones. The fingers are the most important part of it; the rest is decoration."

"Hmm, I see. So it's about making the casting of gestures a more fluid sort of thing, rather than casting in staccato," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh nodded. "That is it, my Lord. I have found it builds a better flow into the magic itself, and it is more powerful when the spell is finished. It is also faster, as the gestures flow into each other, rather than be cast separately."

"Show me," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh nodded. "Very well. This is a simple spell, but still as effective, calling on the first four elements to set a basic protective ward."

Lord Aylesford stood back as Hugh prepared. Hugh spent a moment with his eyes closed, bringing the first four elements of Earth, Flame, Water, and Air to him, before he cast a quick, fluid series of gestures. The final mark of the ward hung in the air as Hugh directed it over a doorway. It settled in place before slowly dissipating, spreading its protective energy all around them.

"I would like to have a ward with all the eight elements done, but as I have not been tuned to them all yet, that has proved a little difficult," Hugh said.

"I will arrange for that next month, then. Does anyone at the Academy know of this form of casting and warding yet?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Sir Richard is sort of aware of it, being in the Watch and all, but no one else knows. I have not been game to speak of it, particularly when I had other projects that were more important," Hugh said.

"I suggest you go talk to Sir Richard properly, then. He will be able to help you with your wards and tunings. Lord Stafford, as well. He would be good to talk to about the casting," Lord Aylesford said.

"Oh, I would not wish to trouble them. I am sure they are very busy," Hugh said.

"Go next week, if not sooner. Talk to them about your ideas and that you are thinking of shifting. They will not let you change projects unless you can demonstrate that you have something equally worthy I am sure they would oblige, but it is best to let them know you are changing projects so they are aware of your progress," Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord. I will go back as soon as possible," Hugh said.

* * *

Hugh rode to the Academy the next morning, hoping to see Sir Richard, and if that wasn't possible, to do some more work on his project. He still found it a little strange to be able to come and go as he pleased; he was still worried he would be missing classes, even though, as an Apprentice, he had no formal classes to go to. He could attend classes on some more advanced subjects, but they were not required. All he needed to do to pass his Apprenticeship was the project he'd chosen. 

Sir Richard turned out to be occupied with teaching during the morning, so Hugh went to the library instead. He would not waste the time he was there if he could help it. He did want to make a good impression that he was working hard on his project, and he could be relied upon by his teachers. 

He was also rather keen to finish his wards. He was rather proud of them, and even though they were not as revolutionary as his pebble magic, they were still quite ingenious. He spent the morning working on the spells he'd written, trying to make sure they were as accurate as possible. He didn't want there to be any mistakes. 

Sir Richard came for him at noon, finding him busy gesturing the wards he was working on. Hugh didn't see him until he sat down and broke the spells he'd cast. 

"Oh, Sir Richard, I am glad to have found you. I wished to talk to you about my project, if you have the time to spare," Hugh said.

"Lord Aylesford sent word this morning that you wanted to see me. He mentioned you were thinking of changing your project?" Sir Richard said.

"That's correct. I am having problems with the pebble magic, and I am not certain I will be able to finish it in time. The man I need to talk to in order to get the spells correct is not available, and may not be available until March or April. If I did not wish to delay my project further, I would simply wait, but I would rather get my first degree and leave the pebble magic for later when I have more time to spare," Hugh said.

"There is no way you can complete the project on your own?" Sir Richard said.

Hugh shook his head. "No, sir. I need this man's expertise or the magic will not scale up, and if it cannot be scaled up, it will not be finished, and if it is not finished, I will not get my first degree by the summer."

"What were you thinking of doing, if not the pebble magic?" Sir Richard said.

"Do you remember those wards I told you about during the time I spent in the Town Watch? I had hoped to develop those further, if that is acceptable," Hugh said.

"Do you mean the ones with that new casting technique you showed me? Where the gestures all flow together?" Sir Richard said.

"That is it, yes. I have developed several shields and wards, but I have not had the opportunity to test them yet, so I cannot know how safe they are to use, and what they are capable of doing. Would this be an acceptable project to replace the pebble magic?" Hugh said.

Sir Richard sat back, taking a moment to think. "Alright, I will accept that. For your assessment, I would ask you to provide an essay on the gesturing technique, a theoretical paper regarding the wards and their uses, as well as a practical demonstration of these wards as proof-of-concept. Is that acceptable?" 

"I am willing to do that, yes. That will be no problem," Hugh said.

"I will have to run it by Lord Albion, and Lord Stafford, as well, so they are aware of what you are doing. If you can provide a written request, outlining the new project you wish to do, along with a letter of support from your supervisor, I will discuss it with them and let you know if you may proceed. I doubt there will be any objections, but I must alert them to your desire to change projects regardless. If your request is with me by the end of next week, I will have an answer for you no more than a week after that," Sir Richard said.

"Yes, sir, I can do that. I will begin work on my letter this afternoon. It will be with you by Friday, I will bring it myself. I thank you for considering my request to change projects, sir, it is greatly appreciated," Hugh said.

"It is no trouble, Mr McDowell. It happens from time to time. You are not the only Apprentice who has had to change their projects mid-way through. Do not feel any shame in it," Sir Richard said. "Also, I should inform you that Lord Stafford has scheduled you and Sir Roy to undergo Animal and Vegetable initiations at his estate over the next two weeks. I believe Lord Aylesford arranged the time for you. You will be staying with Lord Stafford while undergoing your initiations. I believe a letter has been sent to Packington that should tell you everything you need to know."

"Oh, yes, of course. I was wondering when we would be undergoing those initiations. I am glad I will have Sir Roy with me. I should not like to undergo the rites on my own," Hugh said.

"Lord Stafford always calls students in pairs or threes for this reason. They are not done separately, but together, as the bond between you will be most important for the initiations to be successful. Animal and Vegetable initiations are very intense, and quite different to the initiations you are used to. You will need time for them. I can assure you he will take good care of you. I believe you are due there on Monday, so make sure you spend the next few days preparing," Sir Richard said.

"Yes, sir, I will do just that. Was there anything else we need to discuss?" Hugh asked.

"Not for the moment. I will await your letter of request, and Lord Stafford will inform me of your progress with the initiations. I will let you know our decision regarding your request to change your project after your initiations are done. Like I said, I do not think there will be a problem in changing at this stage, but I do not wish to give you permission before I have followed the correct procedures. You will know soon enough. For now, concentrate on your initiations," Sir Richard said.

"Then I will leave you for now, if I may, and return to Packington. I will see you soon, Sir Richard," Hugh said, taking his leave.

"That you will, Mr McDowell. Good luck with the initiations," Sir Richard said.

"I thank you, sir. Good day to you," Hugh said as he left.

* * *

Sir Roy was waiting for Hugh in his room when he got back from the Academy. Sir Roy was seated on his bed, holding a letter that was as yet unopened. Hugh found this curious, and wondered if it was the letter from Lord Stafford. Leaving his bag near the door, he closed it, and went to sit beside him, trying to read the expression on his face. 

"Is that from Lord Stafford, by any chance?" Hugh asked.

Sir Roy looked up at him. "Oh, yes, how did you know?"

Hugh grinned. "I have been speaking with Sir Richard, and he mentioned a letter may be waiting for us. Have you not opened it yet?" 

Sir Roy shook his head. "I do not know why my Lord Stafford would write to us. What is it about? Did Sir Richard mention why he would be writing to us?"

"You had better pack your bags, my friend. We will be undergoing our Animal and Vegetable initiations, beginning next Monday at Highbury Hall. We are to stay there two weeks. Sir Richard said the letter would explain everything," Hugh said.

Sir Roy visibly relaxed, as if he had been expecting bad news. "Oh, is that all? I should have known that. I was aware Lord Stafford did those initnations. I wonder what he says, then."

Hugh watched as Sir Roy carefully opened the letter. Several pages were inside, folded neatly, and it appeared to contain two copies of the same letter, one for Hugh, and one for Sir Roy. Sir Roy handed Hugh his letter, and they sat there together, reading what Lord Stafford had written in silence. The Baron's letter contained a long letter detailing everything that would happen and when. He also included a list of things to bring, as well as some exercises to do before they arrived. It looked like it would be a very intense fortnight.

"I am glad I will be undergoing these rites with you, my friend. I would trust no one else with my name of power, that's for sure," Hugh said once he finished reading.

Sir Roy looked over at him. "You would trust me with that?"

"Of course. You would trust me with yours, would you not?" Hugh said.

Sir Roy thought about that. He knew a handful of such names belonging to his teachers, but he had never known the names of fellow students. Their initiations were always done individually, and they were always taught never to tell anyone your name, not even your closest friends. To be asked to break that, to actually tell Hugh his name of power, seemed like bearing his very soul to him. But he would know Hugh's name, as well. It was an equal exchange of secrets, and of course he trusted Hugh. He could not think of anyone else he would rather undergo the rites with, which reassured him about what he was about to do.

"Yes, Hugh, I would trust you with my name," Sir Roy said.

"Shall we do that particular exercise now, or would you rather make more of a ritual out of it?" Hugh asked.

"I think we ought to do it now, to give us time to deal with the repercussions," Sir Roy said.

"Agreed."

They read Lord Stafford's instructions one more time to ensure they knew what they were meant to be doing, and settled down on Hugh's bed facing each other. They held each other's hands, and stilled their breathing until they were breathing at the same time. They'd been instructed to reveal their secrets in whatever way that felt the most instinctive. Sir Roy and Hugh had decided sexual intimacy was the only way they could bear to reveal such secrets to each other. A wizzard never revealed his name of power to anyone, because of the potential for it to be used against them. And yet, sharing their names that they had been given as young children by the element of Water during their very first initiations was what was being asked of them now, to bind their souls closer than death in order that they might endure together the two initiations that were to come. 

They spent several minutes breathing together, finding that place where they would move as one. They both knew what they were about to reveal. They shared a soft, tender kiss, leaning in to each other almost chastely. Slowly, they began exploring each other's bodies, undressing as they went. They had to know each other inside and out, and Sir Roy enjoyed being able to fully explore all the scars on Hugh's body in a way he had never quite allowed himself to do before. Sir Roy asked about each mark, and Hugh whispered the story of how he had acquired each one. Hugh reciprocated, studying Sir Roy's scars as he discovered them, one by one. 

They shared many intimate things as they made love. They lay close, whispering in each other's ears, sharing everything and concealing nothing. Hugh thrust slowly, even though it made the pleasure almost unbearable, but he was more interested in hearing Sir Roy's whispered confessions, as well as offering his own. Nothing was left unspoken, except their names. In that moment of pleasure, when they were so close they felt it move inside them, that was when they shared their final secrets.

"Water named me Ulysses the Wanderer," Sir Roy whispered, grasping onto Hugh.

"Water - Water named me Sirius the Dog Star," Hugh rasped, thrusting hard one last time as he rode out his pleasure. 

A warm sensation flooded through them, carrying them from pleasure to pleasure. Something stirred within them, and they breathed together without being asked, without even trying. Sir Roy held a hand over Hugh's heart, amazed to find it beating in time to his own. Their souls were one being then, their bodies as one flesh. So that was what it felt like to be united as one.

They lay together in silence in each other's arms for what seemed like hours. They didn't speak; they had nothing left to say. Separating seemed impossible now. Water was with them, and she gently soothed them apart, bringing comfort and love. As they sat up, Hugh noticed night had fallen, and the full moon was shining down into his room. They sat naked on the edge of the bed, beside each other, drinking in the moonlight. Hugh took his hand gently and smiled.


	9. Chapter 9

Monday came too soon, and in spite of their preparations, neither Hugh nor Sir Roy felt at all prepared for the elemental initiations that were to come. They arrived at Highbury Hall just after nine o'clock in the morning, ready to begin. They were shown through to the dining hall, where Lord Stafford was waiting to greet them. 

"Ahh, my newest students. Welcome, welcome, come and sit. Have some tea. There will be nothing strenuous today, as I would rather you take some time to settle in, but we will soon begin in earnest. I hope you are ready. Have you performed the exercises I asked you to do before you came?" Lord Stafford said.

"We did, my Lord. We have been preparing these past few days," Hugh said.

"Good. That is good to hear. I like prepared students, particularly as these initiations are so long and trying. They are not like what you are accustomed to," Lord Stafford said. 

"I had gathered as much from your letter, my Lord. We will do our best for you," Sir Roy said.

"I'm sure you will. I will show you around after you have eaten. This house is a strange house indeed, and you will get lost if you do not know its secrets," Lord Stafford said.

Hugh thought on those words as he took his seat. Sir Roy also seemed to find the words strange, but as Sir Roy had never been here, either, they were both unsure as to what the Baron meant. Hugh assumed they would find out soon enough.

* * *

Afterwards, Lord Stafford showed them around the house, and revealed to them the magical secrets that he used to navigate around it. The house had been magically rearranged by Lord Stafford's father, the 7th Baron Stafford, after a rather spectacular magical accident some years ago that had cost him his life. The current Lord Stafford had not been able to fix it, and had merely resigned himself to living in the strange house. 

Hugh was intrigued to discover that all of Lord Stafford's staff knew how to cast magic, and it was only once he understood how to navigate the house that he understood why. There was no way to find your way through the house if you did not know magic, so everyone who lived in the house, master and servant alike, needed to know magic. Hugh was still not sure he would ever quite understand it, but he did not think it was his job to understand it. He was there for another purpose. 

Lord Stafford had prepared a single room for them, and advised them to sleep together for the duration of their stay, if they would be willing to submit to it. There was nothing in his words that indicated he knew how close they were, though Hugh could tell Sir Roy did wonder whether the Baron indeed knew about their relationship. Hugh felt it was part of the initiations, given how close they were going to become. 

They were shown around the rest of the house and gardens, and Lord Stafford introduced them to the general schedule of what they would be doing. A more detailed introduction would be given the next day, but for now, they had a solid outline as to what they could expect.

They would be doing some more bonding exercises the next day, so that Lord Stafford was satisfied that they were indeed bonded well enough to undergo the rites. There would be a day of rest, followed by three days of meditation, where they would learn the skills needed to assume their animal forms that they would need to meet Animal in the first proper initiation. As they would be going to meet Animal together, they would need to be able to work together. 

How well their Animal initiation went would determine how long they would rest before beginning their preparations for their encounter with Vegetable. There was somewhat less to do for Vegetable, given it was linked to their animal forms, and the work they'd done to prepare for Animal. It was still intense, and it would require preparing herbal formulations that would be used to bring them close to the element. They would spent a few days afterwards recovering at Highbury, and would not be sent home until Lord Stafford was sure they were properly recovered. Lord Stafford took his responsibilities seriously, and he would make sure they came to no harm.

By the time they were done, Hugh felt they would be in for a very interesting time at Highbury, and he hoped their bond was close and strong enough to get them through it. Sir Roy was a little nervous about it, but he was like that before every initiation, so Hugh did not worry that much about it. He went to bed that night wondering what sort of animal his spirit might transform into as Sir Roy lay in his arms, silent and unable to sleep.

* * *

The next day, Lord Stafford woke them early, and after a simple but decent breakfast, they were taken down to a summer house in the sprawling gardens to begin the day's work. Lord Stafford spent an hour detailing exactly what the next two weeks would bring, what would be required of them, and what they might experience. It became clearer then why these two initiations were done in pairs, both as elements encountered together, and as initiations undergone with a partner. The work would be hard, and it would be intense, but Lord Stafford did not think it was beyond them. 

"If anything, I believe you two share the strongest bond I've encountered so far, and I have been conducting these rites in one form or another for eight years now. I hope you don't disappoint me," Lord Stafford said.

"We will certainly try very hard not to do so, my Lord," Sir Roy replied.

"I am sure you will, and I'm sure you will do well. Now, sit opposite each other. I want to test your bond," Lord Stafford said.

Hugh and Sir Roy obeyed, turning to face each other. Even they noticed how different it felt to be so close, to be focussing on each other so intently. They had noticed it before they had arrived at Highbury, after they had shared their names of power with each other. Suddenly everything was much more intense between them, and the longing they felt when apart was far greater than it had ever been before.

"Breathe, just like I told you to do for the first exercise. I am not sure how much magic you have cast together, but the more you have done, the easier this will be," Lord Stafford said. "Once your breathing is synchronised, Sir Roy, summon a flame, and using nothing but your desires, pass it to Hugh. Do not worry if you fail at your first attempt. This is difficult to master."

Sir Roy nodded. "Yes, my Lord."

Hugh watched as Sir Roy summoned a small lick of fire. It sat happily on the palm of his hand. Hugh opened his palm in anticipation, hoping Sir Roy would succeed. He focussed his gaze on Sir Roy, never looking away from him. 

Ulysses, pass me the flame, Hugh thought, unsure if it would actually work. He felt there was no harm in trying.

The flame did move a little, but stopped once it reached Sir Roy's finger tips, and Sir Roy broke contact with him, tired by the effort. The flame instantly vanished.

"I am sorry, my Lord. I did try my best. What is the secret to this kind of magic?" Sir Roy asked.

"It is to test your connection. You must be able to pass the flame by the end of the day, or you will not succeed with the initiations. Try one more time, and then we will break for tea. I will discuss the theory with you then," Lord Stafford said.

"Yes, my Lord. I will try one more time," Sir Roy said.

Settling back down opposite Hugh, Sir Roy settled himself. He took Hugh's hands this time, and they spent five minutes breathing together to ensure they were indeed breathing with the same rhythm. Once their eyes were locked onto one another, they both noticed a subtle energy between them, as if it was linking them together. 

Sir Roy summoned another flame without taking his eyes off Hugh. 

"Ulysses, send me the flame," Hugh whispered, his voice barely audible.

Sir Roy barely heard him. Instead, he gasped as he saw flame coming straight towards him, and he shifted back quickly, breaking contact with Hugh. Hugh did not appreciate the sudden break, and clutched his head with his hands, suddenly cursed with a headache.

"Was that meant to hurt, my Lord? I fear I am in terrible pain. I can see stars, my Lord," Hugh managed to say, finding it difficult to open his eyes from the pain blasting around his head. 

Lord Stafford was by his side immediately, offering him a small flask to drink from. "Drink this, it will ease the pain."

Hugh did not like the taste of it, whatever it was, but he was willing to try anything to get rid of the pain. Lord Stafford lay him down on his side in the shade, making sure he was comfortable. 

"Stay still, Mr McDowell. Let the feverfew work its magic. Sir Roy, go and call for some cold water and cloths, and for some refreshments for us. We will cease work until he has recovered," Lord Stafford said.

"Yes, my Lord, at once," Sir Roy said, getting to his feet. "He will be alright, won't he, my Lord?"

"Yes, he will be fine. He is not the first to have suffered this sort of headache. I know how to treat him," Lord Stafford said.

Reassured, Sir Roy took one last look at Hugh before leaving them alone in the summer house. Hugh barely noticed. He had covered his eyes with his arms, unable to bare any light at all. One side of his face felt numb, and he was riddled with nausea and a sense of his body melting. He could only pray he would not be like this forever. 

"Just rest, don't move. The pain will ease soon. The tea needs time to work. Just stay still and rest," Lord Stafford said softly.

Hugh didn't reply. He lay there still, unwilling to move. He felt he might have been able to sleep if he hadn't been in pain. Time seemed to slow down, but Hugh wasn't sure if that was just his perception, or if it was actually happening. Perhaps he blacked out. Hugh wasn't really sure. At some point, he felt like icy water was being wrapped around his head, and the shock just made the pain worse. 

It took an hour for the pain to cease. Hugh lay there with Sir Roy by his side, wishing it all away. He'd never felt such awful pain before, but he was glad it didn't last. By the time he felt he could sit up, there was just a haze fogging his mind, but otherwise no pain. Lord Stafford handed him a cup of tea, and that slowly helped his mind clear. 

"Is that going to happen again? Because I'm not really sure I like that," Hugh said.

"I've rarely seen it happen more than twice. It's just a matter of getting your magic to work together, and you almost had it then. You should be able to do it by the end of the day. I won't force more work on you until the afternoon. The pain might be gone, but you're not up to casting magic just yet. We will stay here a little longer before retiring to lunch, and continue work after that once I am sure you are well recovered," Lord Stafford said.

"Will all the work be this hard?" Hugh asked.

"It shouldn't be once you've mastered casting magic together. Then, you should only need to discover how to do what is being asked of you. It will be challenging, do not mistake me on that. It would not be an initiation if it was not challenging. But it is not impossible, and I have rarely had students fail. Those who have failed have done so because their bonds were not strong enough. But I have no fear that you will meet with the same fate. You are very closely bonded. You should not find these initiations impossible," Lord Stafford said.

"That is good to know, my Lord. I will hold you to that," Hugh said, offering a slight grin in a bid to reassure him he was fine.

* * *

It was nearly two o'clock in the afternoon by the time Lord Stafford got them working again. They spent another two hours working on the exercise, and finally, Sir Roy managed to move the flame. It was a catalyst; once Sir Roy could do it, so could Hugh, and they spent a further hour practicing with several different spells suggested by Lord Stafford. 

Neither Hugh nor Sir Roy had been able to anticipate how casting magic together would change them. It was as if they now shared each other's minds. There was a link now between them that made their magic more powerful. Certainly, they could still cast on their own, but to cast together seemed more natural. It also meant they could gesture faster; with two wizzards casting together, a spell could be cast more quickly, and each could make up for the other's weaknesses. Sir Roy could cast Water magics for Hugh, who could, in turn, cast Flame magic for Sir Roy. 

Lord Stafford finished the day with a short meditation exercise they were to do every evening before bed. They were to sit still, silently, and in their mind, travel the garden into a wild wood, where they would begin to seek out the face of Animal they would later encounter. They were not to look for any animal in particular; they were to make their request, and Animal would seek them out, in whatever form it deemed appropriate. It would leave things for them to discover along the way, for them to use to piece together its identity. Only once they knew which animal they were to meet would they be allowed to face the initiation proper.

Hugh was dutiful in his meditations, even if it seemed strange to just sit still and imagine things in his mind. He could see the woodlands beyond the gardens, and entered cautiously, wondering what he might find. 

"The novice Sirius the Dog Star calls out to the element of Animal. I come seeking your wisdom. Animal, show me your face," Hugh said in his mind as he stepped into the woodland.

The air was cool, and the leaves crunched underfoot. There was hardly any light filtering though the tall trees, but Hugh wasn't looking at that. He'd barely walked ten metres when he found a feather on the ground. It was a mottled grey feather, with brown speckles on it. Hugh almost thought he recognised it, but he couldn't be entirely sure. He walked on, wondering if he might find any more clues.

Birds chirped all around him. He could hear their calls on the breeze. He couldn't pick out many of them, save the more common ones he was used to. There were several he did not know. He suspected one of them might be the animal he was seeking, but he didn't really know for sure. The feather might not be as literal as it seemed. 

He saw nothing more that first night, and Sir Roy had not been any luckier. Sir Roy had found a foot print; the only thing he could distinguish was the ball of the foot, and a few hinted imprints of toes, but the detail was lost in the mud. 

Right before bed, they sat together to show each other what they'd found. Hands clasped together, they entered the woodland together, and Hugh offered his feather as Sir Roy pointed out the foot print. Neither knew what the other was seeking, not from one clue, but the fact they could successfully journey together made them feel better about what was to come. Perhaps it would not be so difficult after all.

* * *

Hugh had not anticipated that three days of meditation could possibly be exhausting. Most of their waking hours were spent seeking and practising the techniques they were meant to know in order to succeed in the initiation proper. It was not challenging work; it was more the fact that neither he nor Sir Roy were used to the practice, and concentrating so hard for three days mentally exhausted them both, particularly when they spent a whole day practising the initiation together until Lord Stafford was convinced they were sufficiently prepared. 

They knew their animal spirits by now. Lord Stafford had taught them how to manifest in animal form in their meditations, and how to move and navigate. Hugh felt that was enough work on his own, but trying to keep track of Sir Roy as well made things rather more difficult, and not just because Sir Roy had chosen a sparrow, and Hugh, as a wolfhound, was not capable of keeping track of the small bird when it was flying. They spent several hours trying to work out how to travel together, because they would need it when seeking Animal.

The night before the initiation, Hugh and Sir Roy spent the night in the summer house. They had been cleansed and ritually prepared after supper, and told to sleep the night in the small cottage. They would know what to do once morning came. Hugh was rather nervous about this. He was used to being guided through initiations by his teachers, but now, they were on their own. Lord Stafford made a point of explaining that these initiations, while overseen by him, were not done by him. Animal and Vegetable had minds of their own, particularly as they were the two elements that could truly be said to be alive and sentient in the world around them. The others were much more abstract, more like forces of nature. Animal and Vegetable were alive, just like them.

The summer house felt strange that night. Sir Roy had trouble sleeping, and Hugh found he could only sleep after an hour's deep meditation to calm his mind. They were both rudely awoken at dawn by a cock's crow, and neither felt entirely ready for what was to come. They were on their own out here, armed with the skills Lord Stafford had been teaching them, and whatever magic they could summon. Sir Roy prepared some tea while Hugh stared out a window. 

"Do you know what we must do today?" Hugh murmured.

"In an abstract manner, yes. The details are unclear. I have seen strange things all night in my dreams, but none of it makes any sense. Did you fare any better?" Sir Roy said.

Hugh waved a hand dismissively. "I cannot say for certain. I have been dreaming of peacocks."

Sir Roy glanced at him, intrigued. "Peacocks? The only animal I dreamt about was a small lizard with skin made of fire."

"So what should we do, then? I mean, we have to do something today. We're meant to be meeting Animal. Should we go into the gardens? Or are we just supposed to meditate?" Hugh said.

"I think we are meant to go into the garden. Meditation will only take us so far. We will meet Animal today in a very real sense," Sir Roy said, though he was not entirely sure how he knew that.

"I hope it does not eat us alive, then. Perhaps we ought to meditate first, though, just in case we've missed something," Hugh said.

"I am not sure there is much left to miss, but perhaps it would not hurt to do so once more," Sir Roy said.

"I will ask for visions, for guidance as to where we ought to go first. That first step needs to be right. I am sure Animal will lead the way once we have taken that first step to meet them," Hugh said.

Sir Roy yawned. "I just hope I do not fall asleep at noon. I am very tired."

"Then you'd better drink your tea. The sooner we are done with this, the better," Hugh said.

Sir Roy nodded mutely, unwilling to speak. He poured them tea, and they shared the breakfast that had been left for them. They ate in silence, thinking about what they ought to do. 

As they finished, they sat opposite each other and held hands, preparing to meditate together. They did not need so much time to find each other now, and Hugh saw that sparrow come into his field of vision almost immediately. The sparrow had a white cloth tied around its neck, an agreed sign for Hugh that it was indeed Sir Roy. Hugh's hound had a similar white cloth tied around its neck for the same purpose, though Hugh was not sure how many other wolfhounds they would meed in the forest.

Sir Roy sent a vision of a particular tree in the forest. Hugh attempted to remember it, because he was certain it was a tree out there in the gardens. It had a strange symbol carved into its trunk that was not noticeable unless you knew what you were looking for. Hugh got the sense that they would know what to do next once they found the tree. After spending a moment returning from their meditations, they packed some food, a flask of water, and took what else they thought they might need, and left the summer house to explore the gardens.

The gardens at Highbury Hall were most unusual. They stretched out far across the Baron's acreage, and no one had yet been able to determine just how large they really were. They always seemed larger, impossibly larger, no matter how far you went in them. Lord Stafford suspected they had been magically affected when the house had been accidentally magically redesigned, but he could not definitively prove it. It did seem to be a plausible explanation, however.

The gardens were unusual because of the lush equatorial vegetation that seemed to dominate the landscape. Many plants in the garden had never been encountered in the kingdom before, let alone anywhere else in the world. They were strange plants, from small shrubs with large dark green leaves to large trees with thick trunks and a spray of long leaves emerging from the top like a fountain. There were branched trees with sweet-smelling flowers, small delicate flowering plants, extravagant vines growing everywhere, and some of the tallest trees anyone had ever seen. 

There was some semblance of a path cut through them, but it was a dirt path, and it wove a different path every time someone walked it. It was easy to get lost in there, so Lord Stafford had magically warded the place to make it navigable. Hugh and Sir Roy had to prove they could navigate the gardens successfully before Lord Stafford would let them out there. He was not sure he could find them again if they were lost. 

"I hope you have memorised that mark on the tree. I should hate to spend all day walking through these lovely gardens, and not find it," Hugh said as they walked.

"I made a sketch of the mark before we left, from what I remember us seeing. I think we ought to go that way," Sir Roy said, pointing over to a path that branched off to their left. 

Hugh looked in the direction he indicated. "What makes you say that?" 

"Sparrow told me," Sir Roy said without explanation.

Hugh wasn't willing to argue, and they set off to take the left branch. The vegetation was much larger here, and what little sunlight there was barely made it through. The air was cool and moist, and there were strange sounds all through the trees. The path seemed to grow increasingly narrow until it stopped at a stream, where there was no obvious way to cross it.

"So, do we keep going? Do we find a way to cross that stream, my friend? Or have we gone the wrong way?" Hugh said.

"We keep going. There is a bridge to the south, but it may be some distance from here. All I know is that we must cross the stream in order to find the tree," Sir Roy said.

"Where is south, anyway?" Hugh asked.

Sir Roy made a quick gesture to summon a magical compass. A small flare of light showed the direction, and off they went, keeping the stream beside them as they walked. The forest did begin to thin out a little, but it was still spectacularly dense. Ten minutes of trekking led them to the bridge, and they crossed over, hoping it wouldn't be too much longer before they found the tree they were looking for. 

They began scanning every trunk they could see, trying to search for anything they recognised from their earlier meditations that morning. Sir Roy had written down some notes, and the specific mark they were looking for, but both had forgotten much of the contents, and Hugh was sure the tree was beside a large boulder, whereas Sir Roy thought it was near a ravine. After another half an hour of unproductive walking, they stopped beside a small pool for refreshments and to meditate some more to see if they were still going the right way. 

It was only once they reached the forest in their meditations that they understood that the tree they were looking for was not in the physical forest, but in the astral one. Hugh's wolfhound followed Sir Roy's sparrow blindly, not knowing where he was being led as the sparrow took off, apparently knowing where the tree was. 

When they eventually found it, they discovered it was not by a boulder or a ravine, but by a small pool. There, they found a small red fox waiting for them. It eyed them curiously, but made no move to approach them or run away. Hugh wasn't sure if this was Animal's form, or some other spirit. Hugh wanted to speak to it, but before he could do so, the fox fled, running off into the forest. 

"Do you think we are meant to follow it?" Hugh asked.

Sir Roy's sparrow did not answer. It flitted about until it suddenly stopped and dived head first into the pool. Hugh was so astonished, he found himself unable to move, unsure if Sir Roy was in real danger, or if this was just something that happened in meditation. 

_'Are you scared to enter my realm?'_ , came a soft growl in his ear.

Hugh was startled, and looked around for who might have been speaking, but he saw no one. He prowled around the pool, trying to decide if he was meant to dive in after Sir Roy and rescue him, or if he was to stay here and wait. 

_'The bird is not of your concern. She will not see this face, as you will not see the face I show her. Now come, Sirius, if you wish to know my power,'_ the voice said.

The sound of his name of power reverberated through his body and Hugh found himself walking towards the other side of the pool, following a presence he could now feel, but did not otherwise know. Perhaps this was the part of the initiation where they would experience different things. 

The closer he got to the other side, the darker it became. He could see a pair of glowing eyes now, peering out from the darkness. Hugh didn't recognise it as a bear until he was less than a metre away from it, and it growled at him and swiped a paw, telling him to back off. 

_'Do not presume you have any right to touch me, human,'_ the bear growled. 

"I would never think I had any right to touch any such creature," Hugh replied, definitely not wanting to get it angry.

The bear seemed to glare at him for a moment before it gestured for him to follow. Unsure what else to do, Hugh followed on behind him, wondering where they might be going. The bear led him through the thick forest until they came to a small natural pool that was fed by a small stream. It sat at the base of a small rocky cliff, and water from the stream tumbled down into the pool, leaving the water bubbling. 

The bear ambled along and sat by the water's edge. Hugh moved to join it, but kept back in case he might be about to be thrown into the water and drowned. Tentatively, he took a seat nearby, close enough to escape if he needed to.

 _'You will never earn my trust while you are still so fearful, human. Your kind are afraid of the living world, afraid it might harm you. And yet you cannot see the harm you do us, and have done to us, for thousands of years. You cannot see how you poison and kill, how to destroy and burn and rip apart. I have grown weary of trusting humans,'_ the bear said.

Hugh went to speak, but the bear turned to him then and caught him in a fierce gaze. Hugh wasn't sure how to answer him, and then suddenly, all he saw around him was a wasteland. The soil was black and charred, and nothing would grow. Tree stumps littered the landscape, and there was no birdsong to be heard. In the distance, thick black plumes of smoke soared into the sky, turning it dark grey. There was no colour anywhere, no living things, and Hugh suddenly understood what the bear had meant. This was a wound that man had created. 

_'You come to me, wizzard, seeking my wisdom. This, then is what you should know. Carry the sight of that landscape back with you, and do not do any more to hurt us. We are living elements, wizzard. We feel, we breathe, we have to sustain you, and this is how you treat us. You may only be one human, but perhaps you will find it within yourself to respect us. Maybe in time we will respect you in return,'_ the bear said.

''How is it we have done so much to you?" Hugh breathed.

The bear looked at him, and did not answer. It turned and walked away, and when Hugh looked back at the bear, he was back in the forest. The bear had vanished. He walked; there did not seem to be much else to do. He was not sure where he was, but he called out to Sir Roy, hoping his sparrow was nearby. 

He had walked for fifteen minutes before he realised he was not in meditation anymore, but in the real gardens. He stopped, and tried to remember how to get out. He could hear no sound that Sir Roy was near. Perhaps he was elsewhere, maybe he was dead, and Hugh would have to find him. 

Hugh spent a moment reminding himself of how to navigate around the gardens, and then brought up the map. He could see better where he was, and once he remembered how to read the map, he found Sir Roy, who seemed to be over the other side of the garden. There was no clear path towards him, but Hugh felt he ought to go and find him, and set off in the direction that made the most sense to him. 

When he eventually found Sir Roy, he was sitting on a wooden bench underneath a willow tree, lost in thought. He did not seem to know Hugh was there, and Hugh sat down beside him for quite some time before Sir Roy looked at him, suddenly surprised by his presence.

"Oh! Hugh. I thought I had lost you. I have seen some very strange things in these gardens. I am not sure what has happened. The sky is growing dark. We ought to head back to the manor," Sir Roy said.

"Then we had better get moving. We will talk about our experiences later, I am sure. For now, just come with me," Hugh said, offering his hand.

Sir Roy took it as he got up, and slowly, they walked back to the manor in silence, navigating their way back with magic, and a little lick of fire to guide the way.

* * *

The days after Animal's initiation became a vague memory for Hugh. It was not that he did not remember, or had not been aware of them, but as much as he had tried to speak to Sir Roy, or even Lord Stafford, about what he had seen, he found himself unable to speak. He could hear that bear's growl in his ear, as if he was still reminding him of his presence, and the sight of the black land all around him made him shiver. He had not thought it possible that the earth could feel pain, but the bear had shown him it could. It had left Hugh unsettled and his dreams were filled with madness. 

He was not ready for their next initiations. Hugh felt it was too soon. He felt he had barely begun to digest what Animal had shown him when, three days later, he was studying again as Lord Stafford taught both he and Sir Roy what they would have to do. The full moon would be approaching, and on that night, they would brew a tea made from certain plants, find a place in the garden, and embrace Vegetable's power. Lord Stafford and Sir Richard, who had come to Highbury for this initiation, would accompany them to be sure they did not come to any harm. The tea would bring them close to a trance-like state, and Lord Stafford would not let anyone merely wander into a magical forest after taking it, unaccompanied.

Hugh found it daunting. His preparations were not helped by Sir Roy talking about his Animal initiation with him. Sir Roy seemed able to talk about his, and Hugh was regaled with stories about birds and eagles, and a dark underworld cavern where he had flown with a dragon. Hugh wished he had not spoken so much about it. He just felt jealous that Animal seemed to have liked him better, to have shown him something so marvellous. 

Still, he found it hard to complain. Lord Stafford reassured him that what Animal chose to show a particular wizzard was never the same twice, and there was always a reason for its decision. Hugh might not understand now why he had been shown a black, polluted field, but maybe one day, it would become clear to him. Hugh did not think this was particularly comforting, though.

* * *

The full moon rose before dusk, though they had been preparing all day. Hugh seemed to have a talent for brewing potions, and the tea came easier to him than it did to Sir Roy, who had to have Sir Richard make his tea for him, as Sir Roy just could not concoct the stuff without burning it, or turning it a horrid shade of vermilion. 

"What do you think we'll see?" Sir Roy asked as Hugh added the final ingredient to his tea. 

"After what Animal showed me, I am not entirely certain. I do not feel at all ready for this, but it is required, after all, and I would rather complete this ordeal tonight so I can focus on my project. I have not enjoyed these initiations very much," Hugh said.

"Initiations are not meant to be enjoyable, Mr McDowell. They are what they are. The earth is both bright and dark, and to neglect one would be folly indeed," Sir Richard commented.

Hugh wanted to bite back a reply, but decided against it. Instead, he offered a quick prayer to God to save him from eternal torment. If Vegetable was going to devour him like he suspected it might, well, he would need God's help to get out of there in one piece.

"It is time, my friends. Drink up, and we will begin the initiations," Lord Stafford said.

Feeling resigned to his fate, Hugh poured himself a cup of tea, and with a glance at Sir Roy, drank it. It tasted bitter, and he felt it move quickly through his body like wildfire. He was barely aware of Lord Stafford taking his arm as he felt a soft voice singing towards him, drawing him close.

Hugh could not see much beyond a shimmering light that turned into a figure that might have been a woman. She beckoned him forward, and Hugh stumbled on, saved from injury only by Lord Stafford, who kept him from harm. 

The voice was not singing in English, or in any language he knew. She floated on the breeze, glowing a soft golden green, and eventually, she stopped, and Hugh stopped, and suddenly they were together, and surrounded by a white gold light. Hugh couldn't really feel much around him, except for a dry heat in the air. She was very close to him now, and she moved around him, curious. 

"W-who are you?" Hugh murmured.

She made a reply, but he could not understand it. She reached a hand to touch his cheek, and it felt both cool and soft. The only features Hugh could make out where her dark eyes, nothing more than deep dark circles where eyes ought to be. There were echoes of a human form, but she did not, on the whole, look human at all. Her form was a strange mix of plant and animal. She did appear bipedal, but her limbs, such as they were, seemed more woody and plant-like than human. Her feet appeared to have tendril-like roots growing ever downwards into the earth. Her fingers, too, were twisted and bent, and Hugh was surprised her touch was as gentle as it was.

She considered him, and then turned and moved forward, floating on the air away from him. He reached for her, but she slipped from his grasp, and he stumbled as he tried to chase after her. Hugh felt she was leading him through the entire garden, given how far they went. She did not stop again until they were at the base of a huge tree with a thick trunk, surrounded by small scrubby herbs and bushes. Hugh felt absolutely dwarfed by the tree, and his neck hurt as he gazed up, seeking the crown. Hugh was startled to see it disappeared into the clouds above.

"Are we meant to climb up there? How am I meant to climb a tree?" Hugh said, unsure that was why they were there.

She didn't speak this time. Instead, she picked a small cutting of a particular plant from the base of the tree; it was a simple herb, with tri-lobed leaves that were a dark, lush green, and it had small delicate white flowers on the tips, each with five petals. Hugh did not recognise it. She offered it to him, touching it to his head, and his heart. Hugh gazed down at his chest as she pressed the plant into his body, and it glowed as it disappeared inside him. She nodded encouragingly, but Hugh just looked confused. 

"What am I meant to do with that? You haven't poisoned me, have you?" Hugh asked, trying not to sound alarmed.

She considered him one last time before she dissipated with a flash of light, with thousands of tiny pinpricks of light scattering everywhere around him. Somehow the spell had been broken, and as Hugh stepped back, he tripped and fell, landing hard on his back. He seemed to be alone, and looking around, he didn't recognise where he was. The path was dark, and what little of the sky he could see above him was dark and cloudy. Scrambling to his feet, Hugh brushed himself off, and tried to remember where he was. 

"Lord Stafford! I say, are you there, my Lord?" Hugh called as he walked forward a little, taking the path back the way he thought he'd come.

He could hear no one around, and as he walked, calling out for Lord Stafford, he found no one. As he came to a fork in the path, he conjured up the navigational magics to see how close he might be to anyone else who was meant to be there, but no one else appeared to be in the gardens. Hugh took a moment to steady his nerves, hoping this was still just the tea affecting things, and he had not been left alone, lost in a magical garden. 

Hugh felt there was nothing to do but continue walking, and hope he may find his way back to the manor on his own. He did not wish to be out here after dark, though it was noticeably dark as it was, considering the dense forest that surrounded him. The shadows closed in, and Hugh could have sworn the trees were closing in on him as he walked. After a moment's hesitation as a vine swiftly attempted to wrap itself around his leg, Hugh pulled free and ran. The garden was obviously not welcoming to him, and he needed to find the manor soon. 

He called for Lord Stafford, Sir Roy, Sir Richard, anyone he could think of as he ran, watching the huge full moon sink lower in the sky towards him, as if it were an asteroid coming for him. Feeling trapped and alone, he stopped as the path came to a dead end. Daring to look back, he saw hideous plant-like creatures coming for him, slowly closing in. Hugh did not know where to run. There was nowhere to run, and they were upon him soon enough, their leaves, tendrils, branches, and vines suffocating him as they drew him further into the soil, burying him deep in the earth.

Hugh tried to call on the elements he knew to try to break free, but he felt their power very distantly. He would have to find his own way out of this. Just as he felt a vine begin closing around his neck, fire erupted all around him, and there were awful screeching sounds that deafened him. Hugh could barely hear the sound of an approaching horse before there was a flash of bright white light, and then everything went black.

* * *

Sir Roy spent the next few days sleeping beside Hugh. He did not know what Hugh had done, or why he had found himself in such trouble, but he had felt it halfway through his initiation, and had gone in search of him. Together with Sir Richard, they headed back to the manor, and took horses to make the search faster. After two hours, they found Hugh lying unconscious beside a small pool, looking as if he had been half-drowned. He had been clutching a small piece of a plant in his hand that was withered and damaged. With Sir Richard's help, they built a stretcher to carry Hugh, strapping it between the two horses. Lord Stafford found them just as they were about to head back to the manor. He reported that Hugh had run off, and Lord Stafford had not been able to find him. Unaware of all that was going on around him, Hugh was taken back to the manor and put to bed, hoping he might wake.

Sir Roy had prayed over him every day, and had refused to leave his side. He was aware of some of what Hugh was experiencing, as the close magical bonds they had formed at Highbury had meant Sir Roy was now able to share Hugh's dreams. He tried to contact him, to find him and bring him back, but it did not seem to work. All Sir Roy knew was that it physically hurt to be apart from him now, and he would not leave his side until he was awake and recovered from their ordeal.

Lord Stafford and Sir Richard reassured Sir Roy that Hugh's reaction was not unusual. It was not a frequent occurrence, certainly, but it had happened before, and Hugh was not the first to be overcome by the magical powers of the garden. Neither of them knew why it happened; Hugh would probably not remember much that would seem like anything other than a nightmare. Still, Sir Roy was not reassured, and being by Hugh as he slept was all he could do to allay his fears.

Hugh did eventually wake four days later. He had no memory of what had happened to him, and while Sir Roy wanted to tell him everything, he decided to wait at least until Hugh was not quite as dazed as he was at that moment. 

"I have not left your side, Hugh. I could not leave you alone," Sir Roy said.

Hugh took a deep breath, taking that in. "Will I ever be rid of you, heretic?" he teased, offering a grin as he spoke, glancing over at him.

"I have cared for no one else quite as much as I care for you, my friend. I hope you are feeling better. I have been so worried," Sir Roy said.

Hugh brushed him off. "I do not know what caused my troubles, except for magic, but I care not. I feel fine."

Sir Roy was certain he would wait for a physician to decide that before he agreed, but kept silent on that point. "Lord Stafford said we would be allowed to travel back to Packington in a day or two, once you are sufficiently well that he will let you leave. I have already let Lord Aylesford know what has happened, and I promised I would send word when we are due to leave. Do you remember anything at all from our Vegetable initiations?"

Hugh sat up cautiously as he thought about Sir Roy's question. "I have a memory of the garden bathed in moonlight, and I remember horses cantering the paths, but that is all. Perhaps I will remember in time, or maybe I will never remember. I will be pleased to see Packington again, though. It does feel so much like home now."

"Lord Stafford said you may never remember that initiation. You aren't the first to have suffered so because of that particular initiation. Lord Stafford said it is not an uncommon reaction. Some wizzards, it seems, are highly susceptible to Vegetable in a way that causes the garden to react the way it does. He does not know why that is. It is not a sign of rejection, either. It seems to affect those wizzards who are particularly gifted at herbcraft more than others, but I am not so sure about that," Sir Roy said.

"At least it did not kill me, Sir Roy, and for that, I will be forever grateful. I am reassured this has not caused me to fail the initiation, even though that is what it feels like," Hugh said.

"You have your mark on your right arm, Hugh. That is proof enough that you passed," Sir Roy said.

Hugh pushed his sleeve up to find a small green mark depicting a plant he did not recognise. "So you speak the truth, my friend. I was not expecting that."

Sir Roy rolled up his right sleeve to show him his mark. It was a depiction, in lurid shades of purple, of a plant that might have been a rose, or perhaps a carnation. "I have my own, just as you do. It is meant to represent the plant most aligned with your soul, or so Lord Stafford said. I am not sure how this strange flower relates to my soul, but I am not sure I know enough about these things to say so with any certainty. What is yours? Do you remember the plant you were given?"

Hugh shook his head. "I do not remember. There is very little I remember from that particular initiation."

"Perhaps it will come to you in time, then. I certainly do not recognise it, nor did we recognise the plant you had clutched in your hand when we found you. Lord Stafford has never seen it in the garden before," Sir Roy said.

"You are asking me, again, as if I will be able to clarify these things for you. I wish I knew, my friend. I wish I could remember," Hugh said.

Sir Roy lowered his head momentarily. "Oh, I am sorry, I did not wish to sound rude or insistent. I did not wish to cause offence."

Hugh brushed it off. "Do not punish yourself. You have spent too much of your life apologising. It is not your fault."

"Oh, you must be hungry, Hugh. I will go call for some food and tea, is that acceptable?" Sir Roy said.

Hugh shrugged. "I care not what you bring, as long as it is edible, my friend."

"I will only be a moment," Sir Roy said, excusing himself.

Hugh found himself alone and left with his thoughts. His memories were sketchy, but they held enough information to know where he was, and why he was there. He remembered the nauseating feeling of doom as he drank his tea right before he was let loose into the gardens, but nothing more came to mind. Sitting back, he lay down and gazed up at the ceiling, trying to clear his head. Perhaps, in time, he would discover what Vegetable had done to him, but as he lay there, looking at the mark on his arm, he decided he didn't care.


	10. Chapter 10

"Hugh, oh, Hugh, please wake. We're going to London today! Lord Aylesford is taking us to the royal palace!" 

Hugh felt Sir Roy shaking him as he tried to wake him, but his words didn't quite register. Ignoring him, thinking it was a dream, he slept on, until Sir Roy more forcibly woke him, making sure he was awake. Hugh stared up at him, dazed, unsure what was going on.

"What's this about London?" Hugh murmured, all he remembered of Sir Roy's words.

Sir Roy looked both fearful and elated. "Lord Aylesford is taking us both to London! He has gained permission from His Majesty to use his sacred grove. Oh, we will be vowing ourselves in the royal grove, Hugh!" 

Hugh merely blinked. "You are delirious, my friend."

Sir Roy persisted, grasping him by the front of his shirt as he pulled him up. "I very much am not! Come, get dressed, we are to eat, and then set off at once. Lord Aylesford is waiting for us!"

"Alright, alright, I'll get up. I wish he had told us we were going to London today. I would have packed," Hugh said.

"Lord Aylesford took care of that last night while we were in the baths. I did not know he was planning this, either. He only told me this morning when I went to wake him," Sir Roy said.

"Well, I suppose we had better get ready to go, then," Hugh said, lost for anything else to say.

* * *

They dressed each other in what had been laid out for them, before they joined Lord Aylesford and the ladies in the dining room. Lord Aylesford ceased their questions before they could speak, saying they would be leaving in half an hour, and they both should eat their fill. Everything was already prepared, and he had arranged already for their horses to be taken with them, so they might go riding in the parks together.

"Oh, I hope you have not had any trouble with Pluto, my Lord. He is such a troublesome horse. I should not wish for anyone to come to harm trying to ride him," Hugh said.

"Don't worry, my friend. My groom has got the better of him. He's in good hands," Lord Aylesford reassured him.

Hugh almost relaxed, and if he had time, he might have gone to see him one last time, but it was not possible. Conversation would just have to wait until they were travelling, and Pluto would just have to wait until they made a first stop before he could go and see him. 

There was further discussion about the journey, and where they would be stopping, but Hugh hardly listened. He was going to London, and it was all a little overwhelming, if Hugh was being honest. He had not been to London before as his parents had generally refused to take him. He was still unsure of the exact purpose of their visit would be, but Hugh decided he'd find out soon enough.

* * *

Sir Roy had grown more used to carriage travel since he had become the Earl's companion. It still made him feel a little queasy, but it was not so bad anymore. Indeed, Lady Aylesford had mixed up a potion that generally eased his symptoms, for which he was grateful. He was beginning to enjoy the journey, now that he was not so worried about being sick. 

Hugh was not so troubled, and he conversed amiably with the Earl and the ladies as they went. In spite of how the day had begun, Hugh was beginning to get quite excited about going to London. He was being told great stories about what he would see there, from the palace and the gardens to the churches, galleries, and concerts they would be going to. They would be there for two weeks, and Hugh decided he would relish the chance to spent as much time in the city as possible.

Hugh was surprised he was as attentive as he was, given he had only arrived back at Packington with Sir Roy from Lord Stafford's estate only six days earlier. Their initiations were still fresh in their minds, and Hugh was still not sure he had discovered all that had happened. He had tried to speak to Sir Roy about it, but most of the time, his words became caught in his throat, and he gave up, unsure what he was meant to do except puzzle it out for himself.

"Is it true we are going to the Royal Grove? I hardly think His Majesty would let someone like me into his sacred grove," Hugh asked.

"We are going there, yes. I have privilege and friendship with the King enough to ask to use it. I have told him much about your pebble magic, as well, and I know he wishes to talk to you about it, if you would be willing to speak to him," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh had to convince himself the Earl had said those words. The very thought that the King might want to see him, and that he might have any sort of choice about it, was a complete shock. "Oh, but, my Lord, why would he wish to see a Catholic like me? Surely he is going to have me sent to the Tower."

"He can see the practical applications of your pebble magic as you can. If you want it to go anywhere, to be used as widely as possible, having His Majesty on side is not going to hurt your chances of that happening," Lord Aylesford said. 

"Oh, but I have hardly had the time to work on it such that it is in any state to show the King. I fear he would feel it too inadequate to be of any use to him," Hugh said.

"He is not interested in seeing a finished spell, but wishes to speak to you about the concept, and its applications. If you are lucky, he may offer you his patronage to continue working on your pebble magic. Do me the honour of taking any opportunity that comes to you, because this will help you find your own independence from your family. I would be open to anything he wishes to offer you," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh did his best to hide his fear at the prospect of the King offering him patronage. Him, a Catholic, why would the King offer a Catholic his patronage for magic? The very idea seemed preposterous. Nevertheless, he did recognise that Lord Aylesford spoke true. If he did indeed wish for his magic to be used for the purpose he had intended, he could do worse than to have the King's patronage to develop it further. Perhaps he would surpass his father, after all.

* * *

The rain was pouring down when they arrived at Aylesford House, making London seem grey and melancholic. Hugh thought it suited his mood, as it had been some time ago. But Hugh was not feeling the darkness at that moment. Seeing London had excited him, and he was keen to get out and explore it all.

"You will have time enough to explore later, Hugh. For now, we will settle, have supper, and sleep. You will need your strength for tomorrow's duties," Lord Aylesford said as Hugh was about to leap out of the carriage to go wandering.

"Yes, my Lord, of course. Forgive me, I am just so excited to be here. I have listened to your tales of London all the way here, and I am keen to see all of it," Hugh said.

"There will be time enough for that, I assure you. Now, come, I wish to get into the comfort of my home and out of this wretched weather," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh was expecting Aylesford house to be grand, and it did not disappoint. Its opulence took his breath away, and had he not been with others, he may have spent his time wandering slowly through the house, just to see everything it contained. As it was, it was late, and they were all tired and hungry. The prospect of supper was not one to turn down.

He did not much take in the rest of the evening. He was tired, and apart from eating good food, and drinking a little wine, he was in no mood to do much else but sleep by the time he was led upstairs by Sir Roy and Lord Aylesford.

"Are we to sleep in the same room, then, my Lord? I was not aware you had a spare room for us," Sir Roy said as they entered the Earl's room.

"Oh, I have had my study prepared for you. I did not wish to insist you both ought to sleep in here with me every night we are here, so I have made the adjacent room up for you, if you should wish for some privacy," Lord Aylesford said. "You are welcome to avail yourselves of it any time you have need of it. I may keep it that way for the time being, just so it will always be there for you. The books have been taken to my study downstairs. They will not be missed up here."

"Thank you, my Lord. That is very generous of you," Sir Roy said. "I had hoped I might have the space to share with Hugh. I would rather replicate the arrangements we have at Packington than attempt to share one room and one bed. I hope you are agreed, Hugh."

"I am glad of the spare room, my Lord. I should think I will sleep better without being crammed into a single bed with you both, much as I appreciate your company," Hugh said.

"That is what I thought. It is only just large enough, and I thought you would be more comfortable on your own. I may call one of you to bed each night, if you would allow me to indulge in such a thing," Lord Aylesford said.

"I will agree to that, my Lord, now that we know what we both want from this relationship. I assumed Roy might share with you from time to time, and I had rather thought I would appreciate having a bed for myself, if I needed it, so I thank you for your insight in this matter," Hugh said.

"I insist on nothing but your happiness, my friend. I am not here to make you feel uncomfortable. Now, it is late, and we ought to sleep. We have much to do tomorrow, and I will tell you both the reason we are here, and what will be asked of you. You may sleep together tonight, if that is your desire. I do not require company in bed tonight," Lord Aylesford said.

Sir Roy bowed. "Yes, my Lord. I will sleep with Hugh, if it pleases you."

"I would appreciate that. I would like to share my first night in bed here with a friend, if I am not causing trouble," Hugh said.

"It is no trouble, Hugh. I will sleep with you this night. You are just as important to me as my Lord is," Sir Roy said.

Hugh almost wanted to argue his point, but tiredness overcame him, and after a quick goodnight to the Earl, in which soft kisses were exchanged, Sir Roy led Hugh next door to sleep. Once they had changed into sleeping clothes, it was not long before they were both soundly asleep.

* * *

Hugh woke first the next morning, and he lay there in bed, taking the time to get a better look at the room he was in. It was a lovely room, though small, but it did not feel ungenerous. Sir Roy did not appear to be willing to wake any time soon, so Hugh crept out of bed, drew his dressing gown around him, and went to the window to look out at the city.

He did expect it to be grey, though it was grey even moreso than Birmingham. There were patches of green, as they were near enough to the Palace that they might be able to see the parks and gardens. There was still a lot of grey, though, from the buildings in the poorer areas of town. As he gazed at the city as it came to life, he heard the door to their room open. Turning, Hugh saw Lord Aylesford peering in, and he silently gestured for Hugh to join him.

Leaving Sir Roy to sleep, Hugh quietly left the room and shut the door behind him as he followed the Earl back into his room. Hugh wasn't entirely sure why he was being called in, but he didn't mind. It would be nice to spend some time with him alone, without Sir Roy being around as well.

"I hope you have slept well, my friend," Lord Aylesford said. His voice was kept soft, unwilling to wake Sir Roy by their conversation. "Here, have some tea. It will invigorate you."

"I have slept well, yes. I thank you, my Lord," Hugh said, matching his hushed tone.

Lord Aylesford gestured to the pot of tea sitting on the table by the window, and Hugh would not turn it down. Taking a seat, they sat down and Hugh watched as Lord Aylesford served him. Hugh was still not entirely used to seeing the Earl behaving in this way, but it was just how he did things, and he saw no real reason to criticise the Earl anyway. 

"It is going to be a good stay, I can feel it. We will accomplish much while we are here," Lord Aylesford mused as he sipped his tea.

"What, exactly, are we doing here, anyway, my Lord? Sir Roy mentioned something about being able to use the Royal Grove, but I did not really understand him," Hugh said.

"I could think of nowhere else but the Royal Grove for us to make our commitments to each other. I am close enough to the King that he would trust me enough to give me access. I have also asked for His Majesty and the Queen to be present for our rite. I do hope you will not hate me for such an act. I assure you, I invite them as personal friends only. I would not be so crass as to ask a Protestant King to make blessings over a Catholic such as yourself," Lord Aylesford said.

"I thank you for your kind considerations, my Lord. I would have been content with your grove at Packington, my Lord, but I will not turn down the chance to be in the Royal Grove, if I am to be so lucky to be allowed to step inside it. What will our rites comprise of, my Lord, if I may be so bold as to ask such a question? I should like to know what I will be required to do, and what vows I will be making, before I make them," Hugh said.

"We will spend some time today discussing that matter, and all will become clear to you then. We have two days to prepare, so you had better learn the ritual well. We will be greeting the solstice on the 21st, and the Astronomer Royal tells me it will rise at a little after five o'clock in the morning, so you had better get some good rest before then, as well, my friend. You will need it when we are being roused in the dark, cold morning," Lord Aylesford said.

"Yes, my Lord. I will do my best. I am surprised you are spending time with me this morning. I would have thought Sir Roy would have been awake to serve you as valet," Hugh said. "I should not wish to get in the way."

Lord Aylesford brushed him off. "Nonsense. There is time for service, and there is time for tea, and right now, it is time for tea. Sir Roy will be out soon enough, and he can share some tea before he dresses me. The morning routine is not so busy there is no time for rest and leisure. Sir Roy is a baronet, after all. I can hardly give him real servant's work to do. That would be most improper, as much as he will protest against it."

Hugh sat back and sipped his tea. "I am still not used to this strange household you run, my Lord, but I will cease to question it. I would not object if you allowed me to serve you in the mornings as well. I would hate to feel as if I am sitting idly by while Sir Roy is tending to you."

"You are to wash me, my friend, or had you forgotten? You are better with the flame magic. If you would be so inclined to accept this one act of service, I would be much obliged to you. I recognise that it is not part of our pact, though, and you are welcome to refuse. My footman, whom Sir Roy is training, can tend to my bathing if need be," Lord Aylesford said.

"I was not certain you were so keen for me to take on that duty, my Lord, but I would be happy to serve you in that manner, if it pleases you," Hugh said. 

"Your happiness pleases me, whether you wash me or not. Do not make the mistake in thinking you are a servant to me. You are a companion, and you can of course sit idly by while Sir Roy dresses me, if you so desire. He is very good at dressing a lord, after all. Perhaps he might also dress you," Lord Aylesford said, a hint of teasing in his voice. 

Hugh swallowed. He had almost - but not quite - forgotten that morning a month ago when, after an early morning ride, Hugh washed his Lord, and Sir Roy dressed them both with care and tenderness. It had been the first time Hugh had been dressed by him, or by anyone, really, except during the time he was a child, and unable to dress himself. He had not had a valet at his parent's home, and he had not had one at the Academy. And so, like a commoner, he had done without, and had learnt to dress himself, and this had continued after he had moved to Packington, for no other reason than he didn't feel he was at all entitled to it. Lord Aylesford had never pressed the matter. 

"It is - very strange to me, to be dressed by someone, my Lord. Any gentleman ought to be used to it, he ought to think it essential, but it is still a very strange custom to me, if you forgive me for saying so, my Lord," Hugh replied, though he did think that, perhaps, he may ask Sir Roy to dress him again, just once, just so he could feel that sensation of being cared for once more.

"It is a strange thing to get used to, if you have never grown up being served by them. I understand Sir Roy's valet also serves as groom and butler, as well, and this is not uncommon in small estates like his, or your father's, for that matter. He is not very used to it, either, and I notice some mornings where he finds it very strange to be dressed by my valet. I think he feels that sort of intimacy ought to be reserved for lovers, that only you and I ought to be privileged enough to see him in such a state of undress," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh nodded. "I would think that is true enough for Sir Roy. I have always lived with servants, of course, but they generally did not serve me in such an intimate manner. I think that is why I think it strange, to have a servant dress you as if you are a child. Not that I believe you are a child, my Lord, of course, but that is just what it seems to me, begging your pardon for speaking so."

"As I said, I have grown up being served in that manner. But I can imagine how it would be strange to you. It is a custom particular to the nobility to a great extent, to those with large and rich estates able to afford many staff. Even His Majesty has a personal valet, the Lord of the Bedchamber. I believe the Duke of Shrewsbury is currently serving in that position. But I should not wish to pressure you into feeling you ought to be accepting that sort of service yourself, nor would I expect you to serve me in that capacity if you were not comfortable with it," Lord Aylesford said.

"I would be content to wash you, my Lord, if that is what you would appreciate. I would at least feel as if I am doing something for you. Besides, we cannot have Sir Roy attempting to fill the bath, given how atrocious he is at flame magic," Hugh said.

Lord Aylesford allowed himself a smile at his last comment. "That is very true. Very well, then. You will wash me just while we are staying in London, just for the moment. Sir Roy only serves me as valet while I am in London, so it seems only appropriate for you as well. I am mostly trying not to jeopardise your studies at the moment, for both of you, as you will have more than enough to do without having to serve me at the same time. We will reconsider these things again once you have both obtained your first degrees." 

It was then that Sir Roy came out to greet them, and duly joined them for tea. Lord Aylesford offered him a kiss, and Hugh followed suit, glad to be with them both. 

"What have you been discussing this morning?" Sir Roy asked.

"We have been talking valets, my love. Hugh will wash me while we are in London, as you will dress me. I hope this is agreeable," Lord Aylesford said.

"I will not miss trying to fill the bath, my Lord. I do adore dressing you," Sir Roy said.

"I am well aware of that. I always look forward to it. I have missed you these past few visits to London, but I did not wish to distract you from your work. I will try to bring you both here again more often," Lord Aylesford said.

"What will we be doing today, my Lord?" Sir Roy said, stifling a yawn. 

"We will be rehearsing the rite we are to perform in three days. We will use my ritual room here. It is not a difficult ritual, but it is one you need to be familiar with. We will be greeting the solstice dawn, and you will need to know what to do, as it will be cold and dark," Lord Aylesford said.

"Oh, no, my Lord, we will be getting up early, won't we?" Sir Roy said with a sigh. "I do not like doing ritual in the early morning."

"The solstice carries its own magic, Sir Roy. The longest night of the year will soon be upon us. As light returns to the earth, and the days get longer, so our bond with become stronger as the sun grows stronger. It was His Majesty who suggested the timing. I believe he performed this rite with Lord Darling many years ago when the Duke became his Lord of the Bedchamber. It's a very powerful rite. Feel privileged that he would let us use it for our own purposes," Lord Aylesford said.

Hugh was aghast. "This is the _King's rite_ we will be performing? In the _Royal Grove_? Oh, my Lord, as a Catholic, I am not sure I can-"

Lord Aylesford raised a hand to silence him. "Hush, my friend. It is a sacred grove, not St Paul's Cathedral. There are no restrictions save ones the King himself applies, and he is happy for us all to use it to seal our bonds of companionship. He is aware of your faith, Hugh. Sometimes, magic can bridge more between us than faith can. He will not stop you entering the grove, nor allowing you into the palace. You have my protection, and the King's protection. No harm will come to you."

Hugh did his best to believe him.

* * *

Hugh found it strange that they would spend so long practicing the ritual in the days leading up to the solstice. The rite was indeed not very complicated, and it did not take long for him to learn his parts well enough. Lord Aylesford insisted they continue practicing, though, and Hugh was not inclined to disagree. Even Sir Roy felt it was good to immerse himself in the ritual for such a long time before they would perform it in the grove. Hugh could see the benefits to that. It was all he thought about when he was not practicing, and he dreamt about it every night. Perhaps that was the Earl's intent. 

Certainly, Hugh felt a little disappointed that he had not seen much of London yet, but he knew there would be time enough for that once the ritual was done. Lord Aylesford had promised to take him, and Sir Roy, riding every day in Hyde Park, and Hugh had discovered from the Earl's cook that there was a Catholic chapel not far from Aylesford House. He was eager to see it, though he had decided to save it for later, when he would have more time at his disposal. Nevertheless, that there was a Catholic chapel in London at all brought him great cheer. It would be good to be in his sacred space, if for a short while. 

These thoughts were all pushed aside on the afternoon before the ritual. Lord Aylesford announced they would all be attending the palace that evening, where they would dine with the King and Queen, before performing their ritual in the early hours of the morning. Lord Aylesford indicated it would be a long night, and that they should be prepared for little sleep until the next day. 

Hugh was quite daunted by this prospect, not only of meeting the King, but of the ritual that would last well into the night to greet the dawn. Sir Roy was not much looking forward to it, either, but they'd both decided it would be worth the effort. Sir Roy reassured him the King was a kind man, and if indeed he was keen to meet Hugh, then he should hardly fear his wrath for being Catholic. Hugh kept this in his mind as they travelled to the palace, and tried not to feel too overwhelmed by everything he saw around him. 

King Charles met them in the blue reception room, with the Queen and Lord Darling also present. He smiled broadly as he rose to greet Lord Aylesford. Hugh did his best to keep calm, being in his presence. He clutched Sir Roy's arm, hoping the King would not throw him out. 

"Ahh, my good friend, it has been too long since you were here, Aylesford. You have been too busy!" The King said as he embraced Lord Aylesford warmly.

"Your Majesty, I have been busy running the county for you! I would not shirk my duties. It is good to see you again, though. I do love this house," Lord Aylesford replied. 

"And what a fine job you do, Aylesford. A King could not wish for a better Lord Lieutenant," the King said. "I hope the journey was not too torturous for you all. The weather has been atrocious."

"The weather is always atrocious this time of year, Sire. The journey is always miserable when it is raining, but good flame magic keeps the horses from falling ill, and the carriage warm. It is good to be here, though. Everything is well with you?" Lord Aylesford said

"Indeed, my good friend. We are very well. Lady Aylesford, you are looking delightful this evening," the King said.

Lady Aylesford curtseyed respectfully. "Thank you, Your Majesty. I recall this is one of your favourites, is it not?" 

The King smiled as he went to greet her, taking her hand as he kissed it chastely. "It is, my Lady. The colour does cheer my soul."

Queen Charlotte approached her, and took her hand. "You are well? I have missed you, my Lady."

"I have missed you, too. May we walk in the gardens tomorrow? I would love to see the new parts of the garden you told me about some time ago," Lady Aylesford said.

"It would be a pleasure, my Lady. There is a lovely rose garden you will love very much," the Queen said.

Just as Hugh was about to excuse himself, thinking he and Sir Roy were not important enough to be greeted, Lord Aylesford and the King approached. Hugh offered a bow to him, hoping this meeting would go well, and that his fears about being a Catholic in the King's presence were not going to be realised. 

"Sire, may I present Sir Roy Wood, 7th Baronet of Castle Bromwich Hall whom you have met, and Mr Hugh McDowell, son of Mage Jeremiah, Baronet of Cathedral Manor. Mr McDowell is the Apprentice who created the pebble magic I was telling you about," Lord Aylesford said.

"Ahh, yes, I have heard many fascinating things about this magic of yours. I should like to discuss it further with you. Lord Aylesford tells me it holds much potential for the provision of food to my subjects," the King said. "And Sir Roy, it is a pleasure to see you again, and in much happier circumstances. Come, come, be welcome here at the palace. You are my guests, and I am glad you are both here."

"Thank you, Your Majesty," Hugh said, offering another deep bow. He did not wish to push his luck and forget the proper protocols. 

"Come, my friends, I wished to show you the sacred grove before we retire for supper. It looks glorious in this late afternoon light, and it will do you good to see it in daylight before we return in the hours before dawn," the King said.

* * *

Hugh found himself being led outside, Sir Roy still by his side, as they took the long path through the gardens to the lake, where the grove sat on a small island in the middle of the water. The path led to a wooden bridge that served as the only way into the grove. It was lined with lanterns. 

The island was hard to see at first. Weeping willow trees and other low greenery concealed the grove from view, though the tops of the trees that made up the grove could be seen far above them. Across from the bridge there was a gate, and the King unlocked it, allowing them to enter. 

Hugh had never seen a grove so beautiful before. The surrounding trees created a warm atmosphere once inside the grove, and they provided a nice ring of protection from the elements. Hugh found he couldn't really see anything beyond them. They were dense, and acted as a good screen. 

The trees of the grove themselves were large and old. How old, Hugh didn't know, but they were all well-established and stood proud in their specific places. The circle they created wasn't as big as Hugh expected, either. He estimated that it was probably smaller than Lord Aylesford's, but Lord Aylesford's did not stand on an island, and perhaps there was more room to make it larger than there was on this island. In many ways, it was not that dissimilar to Lord Aylesford's grove, or to the groves at the Academy. Sacred groves were, on the whole, very similar sort of structures. But there was something about this one, this Royal Grove, that felt different. Certainly, each tree had its [corresponding elemental symbol](http://i41.tinypic.com/2lc8gb5.jpg) carved into the trunk, and altar stones sat at the bases of both oak trees. There was a small raised pavilion in the centre of the grove that contained a brazier, and more elemental symbols. There was even a small summer house near the brazier, and Hugh didn't need to guess what it might be used for. 

And yet, there was just something about this Royal Grove that felt wholly different. He just couldn't pinpoint what it was. Perhaps he would never know. 

"I hope this is a suitable space, Aylesford. It will look different tonight, bathed in firelight that tries to fight off the darkness, but no less magical," the King said.

"Any grove you are willing to use is suitable, Sire. I am grateful for allowing us to use it for our rather personal rituals," Lord Aylesford said.

"You are like family, Aylesford, and I longed to see you back here at the Queen's palace. I hope you will forgive the duplicitous nature of your monarch in his bid to see his favourite Earl," the King said.

"I would sooner die than refuse a request to visit, Sire. The palace is looking more beautiful every day. I cannot wait to see your refurbishments completed," Lord Aylesford said.

"Only the best for my Charlotte," the King said, smiling warmly at his Queen. "Now, you all know what we are doing? I have made all the necessary preparations. You need only bring yourselves."

"We have been rehearsing the rite since we arrived in London a few days ago. We are prepared. Was there anything else you needed us to do?" Lord Aylesford said.

"Nothing but enjoy my hospitality, my friends. I have had rooms prepared for you, and you may stay as long as you like," the King said. "Sir Roy, Mr McDowell, I should insist you stay a few days. There are many things I would like to discuss with you both."

"Then I cannot possibly refuse, Sire. I thank you," Sir Roy said, offering a curt bow of his head.

"I will tell you stories of your father's courage, my boy. You ought to know your heritage. Mr McDowell, if you would show me your pebble magic, I would be most obliged," the King said.

"I - of course, thank you, Sire. It would be an honour, Your Majesty," Hugh said. 

King Charles waved off his attempt to bow a third time. "You are not at Court, Mr McDowell. There is no need for such formalities. You are my guest here, and that is all I require from you."

Hugh caught himself attempting to bow, and straightened. It would take some time to stop the desire to show due deference to him. "Yes, Sire."

* * *

They didn't stay much longer. Night was closing in, and they returned to the palace for supper. Hugh hadn't expected that supper would be more akin to a grand feast, and while they dined in a rather informal manner, Hugh could not help wondering if he was behaving appropriately. 

Halfway through, after rather a lot of wine had been consumed, Hugh found himself calling for the ingredients he needed for his pebble magic as King Charles insisted on a demonstration in the middle of their feast. The table was cleared, a fire lit, and the cauldron set in place. Filled with a deep-seated nervousness, Hugh did his best to perform the original spell perfectly for the King, hoping it would be enough to impress him. When he retrieved two spiced buns from the cauldron, and both were deemed very edible as everyone present insisted on a taste, Hugh finally allowed himself to relax. 

"You truly are Mage Jeremiah's son if you have created such a spell out of thin air, my young friend. What a glorious creation! And from so little! The savings from feeding my armies alone would be enormous, and I am certain even the poorest could cast this spell if they were taught adequately. Perhaps we ought to start teaching magic to the lower classes after all, if magic can improve their lives so much," the King said.

"I would love to see such a thing, Sire. I would love that the poor could feed themselves well. If my magic can be used for such a cause, I believe I could say I had lived a good life. I believe this is the work God wants me to do in this world," Hugh said.

"You and I shall discuss this further, mark my words. You might be a Catholic, but on this we are agreed," the King said.

Hugh wasn't sure at what point the feast stopped. All he remembered next was stumbling into bed with Sir Roy in the dark, and hoping they might sleep long enough to be able to cast magic later on when it was very early, very cold, very dark, and very much the time when they both wanted to be in a warm bed together.

* * *

Hugh felt he had been very disciplined during the feast. He had not drunk very much at all, and he noticed Sir Roy had also held back. Hugh appreciated this decision very much when he was woken at half-past three in the morning, and he did not have a headache that made him feel like death had hit him with a carriage. 

They had a short time to dress, and they ate a simple breakfast to get them going, along with a strong cup of tea. While most of the household slept on, Hugh and Sir Roy, accompanied by Lord Aylesford, Lady Aylesford, and Miss Matthews made their way quietly down to the main entrance of the palace, where the Queen, her companion Lady Julienne, the King, and Lord Darling were waiting for them. Accompanied by twelve trusted Yeomen of the Guard, they walked down to the grove by torchlight in silence.

The yeomen formed a guard around the grove while they processed inside. It did look quite different now that it was dark, though the protective willows had made the air not as icy cold as it was outside. They all walked the circumference of the grove, lighting all the lanterns that were set around and inside the space. Their collective light was rather greater than Hugh expected, and the place seemed bathed in the soft light of dawn as the fires shone all around them. 

The ladies performed the elemental cleansings. Hugh still wasn't entirely used to this concept of women performing magic, but he was hardly going to stop the Queen performing magic if she was competent enough to cast. She channelled the second four elements strongly and calmly, and Electricity was the only one that caused him any strife as he hadn't been tuned to it yet. It seemed to claim him in that moment, though, as the Queen channelled it around and through him. Hugh felt the familiar jolt through his heart, and Electricity whispered its claim on him harshly in his ear. It may not have been a proper initiation, but as long as he had been claimed, and he had the scar to prove it, he knew he would be fine.

Not that he was thinking about initiations at that moment. The atmosphere changed around them as the elements were brought forth to cleanse and bless the space as a first casting. Once everyone had been cleansed by the elements, they all cleaned the space and prepared for their ritual. Hugh had been given specific spells to chant as he did this, along with what everyone else was chanting. This set the foundations for the casting of the wards.

Hugh had never set up a sacred grove in this manner before, though he had studied it. It was usually set aside for complex rituals for degreed wizzards that required a more thorough foundation for the wards to be protective. Hugh thought it might have been used for the wards placed in the great hall at the academy where they did their exams.

Hugh had only one ward to cast this time. He had been given Flame, and he felt Flame's hot embrace as he brought the element forth, calling to its guardian as he set the ward in place. Sir Roy had been given Water, while Lady Aylesford and Miss Matthews had been given Air and Earth. Lord Aylesford and Lord Darling, the Queen, and Lady Julienne, handled the second four between them. King Charles finished the casting with the invocations and setting of the wards for Time and Infinity.

The whole space felt different when the grove had been warded. It now felt like a distinct place set outside of time and space, and the air was noticeably warmer. The King and Queen stood either side of the brazier, which was now lit with a bright orange-purple flame. Lord Darling and Lady Julienne took positions flanking the platform. Hugh was a little disappointed there hadn't been a procession down the aisle towards the platform as he, Sir Roy, and Lord Aylesford, were made ready for the ritual, their hands bound with red and white cord. Miss Matthews and Lady Aylesford stood behind them, completing the space they marked around them. 

Hugh found himself in the middle, with Sir Roy and Lord Aylesford to either side of him. He did understand the reasoning for this, given the bonds that were being formed, but he did rather feel Lord Aylesford ought to be in the middle, escorting his two companions to be so joined. 

"We stand here in this sacred grove, surrounded by the forces of Nature, to bind these men as companions, to seal their lives together with the power of God's love. To break such a bond, once formed, would be a grave transgression against God's covenant. If any of you are unwilling to submit to such a bond, leave the grove now, or be it upon your head," the King said, beginning the ritual.

There was a moment of silence, though no one particularly expected anyone to leave. Hugh did consider it one last time, but there was no desire to flee, not anymore. He would willingly bind himself to the two men standing opposite him with God's magic. To be without them was not an option. 

"Who brings these men to be so joined?" the Queen asked.

Lady Aylesford and Miss Matthews stepped forward, presenting them to the King and Queen, and spoke their response together. "We bring these men to you to be so joined. We bring Mr Hugh McDowell to be so joined to Sir Roy Wood, and also to be so joined to Lord Aylesford."

"The responsibilities of companionship are many, and few. In accepting this bond, you are entwining your souls, and your fates, with each other. Your hearts, your minds, your bodies, are one, just as a marriage bonds two souls into a single union in Christ. You are charged, then, with living for each other, with living for Christ, and submitting to God's will," the King said.

"Do you consent to be joined in such a manner to each other, and to accept the responsibility that such a bond will bring?" the Queen said.

Hugh, Sir Roy, and Lord Aylesford responded, "We do. We come willingly to this ceremony, and accept the responsibility of this bond of companionship."

Lady Aylesford and Miss Matthews stepped forward then and presented the rings to the holy fire burning in the brazier. The King and Queen blessed and sanctified them in the flames, and with the rest of the elements in turn, to confer their blessings, magics, and protection to them. It was a simple piece of magic that was used to seal the bond into the rings, and in doing so, create an item that did its best to remind its wearer of the bond they had made. Hugh suspected similar magics were embedded in the companion's rings that Sir Roy and Lord Aylesford wore, though he could not be entirely certain. It was a form of magic he had not been taught yet. 

"These rings symbolise the bond you are making. With your vows, they will serve as reminders of what you have agreed to do, and the bond you have accepted. Which of you are making your vows first?" the King said.

Sir Roy and Hugh stepped forward, and while Hugh was still bound to Lord Aylesford, it was not so tight nor the cord so short that he could not move to make his vows to Sir Roy. Hugh felt a little nervous, but it was not the sort of nerves he knew were based on fear. It was more a recognition of the enormity of what he was about to do. This was not just any kind of promise, but a magical bond between them. He would come away from this ritual with two magical bonds he would be asked to keep, and while the prospect was daunting, he knew he would not have it any other way. 

Miss Matthews offered Hugh a ring, and Hugh prepared to make his vows as he gave his ring to Sir Roy. They would make identical vows, of course, and then he would repeat the same vow with Lord Aylesford, though the prospect of giving him a ring seemed a little, well, improper. He did not think he had the proper stature to be giving a ring to any lord, but he felt this was more a residue of his upbringing, and pushed his feelings of inadequacy aside. 

"With this ring, in the presence of the elements of Nature, and of God, I make this commitment to you, Sir Roy, to be your companion in Christ from this day until the end of time. All this I vow in God's name. Amen," Hugh said as he slipped the ring onto Sir Roy's left ring finger. 

Sir Roy smiled shyly at him as he too spoke his vow and gave Hugh his ring. Their words sealed their bond, and Hugh could feel the intense bond between them now. It felt, in some ways, as significant as the afternoon in which they shared their magical names with each other, though the power surrounding them now was magnitudes greater. This feeling only increased, though Hugh did not quite know how, as he made his vows with Lord Aylesford. The ring was not quite the same, but the power was identical, and the energy he felt between them all, now that they were all bonded together, was incredible. 

"You have made your vows before Nature and God Himself. The elements stand witness to your words, and their power will hold you to your commitments. Be true to them, be true to yourselves, and be true to God. May your bonds never be broken," the King said.

Somehow, Hugh never quite knew how, their ritual had, to this point, collided with the first tantalising glimpses of dawn. It was not quite obvious yet, but gazing up through the grove to the sky, it was beginning to soften and lighten on one side, just a little. It still seemed very dark in contrast to the brightness of the grove, but he could hear the birds beginning to sing, and knew that the dawn of the solstice was soon on its way. 

Half the lanterns were extinguished then, in preparation for the dawn. The rest were lowered, their flames reduced, so that the flame in the brazier was the brightest light they could see. Standing around, soft chanting of hymns and Psalms were the only sounds that could be heard, apart from the birdsong, and the fleeting caresses of the wind against the willow trees. The water in the lake around them glistened softly, trickling quietly around them. 

Hugh thought about many things in that moment. He wanted to kiss Sir Roy desperately, to share his love as if they were married now, but they were not alone, and he would not show his intimacy for him in front of the King. He might be able to forgive him for being a Catholic, but Hugh was not sure he would be forgiven for being a Sodomite. 

Everyone faced the dawn, now. That the longest night of the year would soon be over was comforting. Soon, the deep dark of winter would be upon them, but it would not last. The days would grow ever longer, and the growing warmth would return as the land thawed. 

Hugh could not have counted how long it took for the bright sun to shine through the eastern side of the grove. All he knew was that, at some point, the sky became bright, and golden light streamed through the leaves to greet them. Everything they touched shined with radiance. Hugh had never felt such power from sunlight before as it reached him, shining upon him and his new companions beside him. Energy rose within him in a manner he could not articulate, except that it felt like God's grace touching and blessing them. Hugh closed his eyes, and drank it all in, feeling at last that he was at one with the world around him.


End file.
